I Had No Idea That Gabapentin Could Do This…

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I have struggled with mental health issues for the majority of my life. As a child, I remember being afraid of various things, and anxiety became a regular part of my everyday life as a teenager. However, it wasn’t until I was in my mid 20’s that I was diagnosed with OCD and depression. With this diagnosis came the usual recommendation of antidepressant drugs and therapy. I have lost track of all the psychiatric drugs I have taken, but for the past few years, the drug of choice has been Clomipramine at 50 mg daily.

I wish this story were about me safely tapering off Clomipramine and my triumph over drug withdrawal. As life tends to do, my journey took an unexpected turn. Little did I know at the time, but after my first bout with COVID-19, my journey with psychotropic medication would turn into a nightmare.

In August of 2021, I enjoyed returning to work as a Bible teacher at an outstanding Christian school. I knew COVID-19 could not be totally avoided, but I had done all I could to prevent infection. However, I ended up contracting Covid a few weeks into the school year and had what I considered to be a mild case. About two weeks after my Covid illness, though, I developed nerve pain and painful muscle spasms throughout my legs. I began to search online for a medication that could help me. The pain was tolerable for the most part. Still, my annoyance with this malady continued to grow, so after speaking with my general practitioner, I decided to give the drug Gabapentin a try.

I remember my mom telling me a few years ago that I should never read the side effects of medication because if I did, I would never take any medicine. For the most part, I had headed her advice.

At the end of October 2021, I began taking Gabapentin 300 mg once a day. This was as the doctor had prescribed, so I did not think anything of it. The medication at this low dosage did not seem to be helping me, so after two months, I decided to up my dose to 300 mg twice a day after speaking with my new neurologist. Immediately, I started to experience side effects from the increased dose. My vision had become blurry. I felt nauseous and unsteady on my feet. I realized this drug was not for me and decided my last dose would be on Christmas day, 2021.

As we entered the new year, with my thoughts that Gabapentin was now behind me, I started to experience some very odd symptoms. Some of my muscles would randomly jerk. I was twitching a ridiculous amount. My anxiety/intrusive thoughts were drastically increasing, and I wasn’t sleeping well. I had no idea what was going on. On January 3rd, I went to see my neurologist and asked him if what I was experiencing could possibly be caused by stopping Gabapentin. He flippantly said, “No, you’ve only been on the drug for two months and on such a low dose.” I drove home to my dad’s house later that day, and my symptoms only worsened. I started experiencing intense suicidal ideation. This felt like nothing I had ever experienced before. I could not sleep for more than an hour at a time for 3-4 days straight. I felt restless and nauseous.

Desperate to find some help, I turned to the Internet. It was through a Facebook search that I stumbled across a group called Lyrica Survivors. I could not believe what I was reading there. Thousands of people had experienced trouble with coming off either Gabapentin or Lyrica. I posted some of what was happening to me, and through the wise counsel and direction of people in the group, I decided to reinstate taking Gabapentin at 200 mg a day (100 in the am/pm). After a week, I started to feel more stabilized.

I still could not fathom what had happened to me. I had taken off the first two weeks of the semester from work because I was not functioning at a high level. Finally stabilized on Gabapentin, I returned to work. Trust me; I still did not feel well. I was desperate to get off the drug. I had only been on it for a few months, so I was determined to try and make another drop in dosage two weeks after I had stabilized on 200 mg. I figured I could drop from 200 mg to 100 mg, which would be fine. Everything online seemed to indicate that I could do this. I would not go cold turkey this time, so I should be okay, I thought. I was wrong once again.

On January 20th, I dropped down to 100 mg of Gabapentin. At first I seemed fine, but after about a week, all hell broke loose again. I had heeded the advice from online internet articles, medical websites, and journals, and they had led me astray. I started up-dosing and did not take the exact dosage for about another week (truthfully, I had no idea what I was doing). This was causing me more problems, so I dropped back down to 100 mg. It was the beginning of February, and I requested a leave of absence from work. Emotionally I was a wreck. I felt like my life was ruined, and I was suffering every single day from horrible symptoms. I finally realized that one symptom I was suffering from was akathisia. My suicidal ideation increased once again, and my insomnia had returned. Desperate for help once more, and after speaking with my dad, sister, and girlfriend, I decided to go to the hospital.

I entered a prestigious Atlanta hospital on February 1st, checking myself into the emergency room. Because of the ongoing pandemic, I was tested for Covid-19 as I was admitted to the ER. I came back with a positive test. I could not be transferred to a psychiatric hospital because of this, so I sat in the Covid wing of the hospital for four days. During this period, I received minimal care. It was horrible. The psychiatrist I saw in the hospital told me that there was no way that what I was experiencing could be caused by Gabapentin. She said I was on too low of a dose for that to occur. She assured me they could take me off Gabapentin when I transferred to the psychiatric hospital. I told her I had tried that before, but she brushed me off. I immediately called my sister and told her to get me out of there. The psychiatrist reluctantly released me after I assured her I would not take my life.

On February 4th, I was back in my apartment and taking Gabapentin at 200 mg (I decided to stick with this dose after a conversation with a nurse the day before at the hospital). I felt so alone and hopeless. No medical professional fully believed my story. Every doctor said that either I was suffering from Long Covid symptoms or that my mental illness was the ultimate problem. For most of the following days, I lay on my couch in despair, just praying for this to be taken away.

I decided that the only people I could trust for help were in the Facebook group. Thousands of people had struggled with coming off of Gabapentin and Lyrica, but eventually somehow made it off, so I decided to give their tapering method a shot. They recommended a 10% drop in dosage every month. So after stabilizing on my dose for a month, I began my taper. It was anything but fun, but I began to feel confident that I could get off of Gabapentin. As I tapered lower and lower, I experienced internal tremors, vibrations, dizziness, nausea, ear pain, burning skin, akathisia, and vision problems. I was not going to stay on Gabapentin for years, so on May 25th, 2022, I decided to make the jump off at a very low dose after a four-month taper.

I am now a few months off of Gabapentin, and my withdrawal problems have not passed. I still deal daily with internal tremors throughout my head and back. I still have the burning skin from time to time. My vision and hearing are still not back to normal, but they have improved. Things are far from normal.

I am surprised to have made it this far. Before this experience, I never knew that medication could cause any human being such pain. I was just naive. This year, without a doubt, has been the hardest of my life. I struggle with depressive thoughts about what I have lost almost every day. A drug that helped me none and that I took for just over six months has caused me to lose the job that I loved (I did not return to teaching because of my ongoing health issues caused by Gabapentin). I have lost friendships, thousands of dollars of income, and my health. I had to spend five weeks in intensive outpatient therapy to restore some of my mental health. I have never been through anything this traumatic before in my 34 years.

My goal is to get off my antidepressant in the next few years and never take another psychotropic drug for the rest of my life. I have been shocked to learn about so many people whose lives have been destroyed by simply taking medication as prescribed. I must admit that I have had a hard time offering forgiveness to the pharmaceutical companies and doctors who prescribe these medications. But I know that I must not continue living with bitterness. I chose to share my story to shed light on the dangers of psychotropic drugs in the hope that others may be spared the pain that thousands upon thousands of people still suffer daily.

If you are reading this, you might not be religious or share the same faith as me, but I would like to conclude with two verses that have been my anchor this season. These are words that the Apostle Paul wrote to the church in Corinth in the first century. He said, “For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal (2 Cor. 4:17-18). This is the end of my story for now, and I hope it might benefit at least someone out there.

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Matt Manry
Matt Manry is a former pastor and teacher. He currently works for a small SEO company in Atlanta, GA as he tries to recover from an iatrogenic injury caused by Gabapentin. He loves Atlanta sports, his wonderful girlfriend, and books, and hopes to return to working with his outstanding students once he has recovered.

69 COMMENTS

  1. The idea that there is such a thing as “Mental Illness”, and that the stresses and strains of life should be interpreted as “Mental Illness” is a fallacy.

    Any mood altering chemicals, street, pharmacy, supermarket, doctor’s prescription are addictive and they will take over our lives.

    And the I Am A Christian Movement has always been highly compatible with the Mental Illness Myth because the fallacy of Mental Illness works just like Original Sin.

    Freud found in every single one of his patients, female hysterics, evidence of childhood sexual molestation. And Freud was pilloried for this. But Freud was a Jew. By the time he published his Interpretation of Dreams, he had converted this evidence to Childhood Fantasies of Incest, Original Sin.

    Psychoanalysis and psychotherapy became popular because religion could not accept our sexuality. But Freud said that we are all animals, so sex was okay. But then Freud turned sexual desires into incestuous neurotic fantasies.

    Joshua

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    • Joshua, you are so ‘on the money’ in terms of your view (the truth). Those who profit from the fallacy of mental illness perpetuate and medicalise all aspects of human behaviour because neuroleptic polypharmacy is a gargantuan money spinner and ‘they’ need mental illness to survive. The DSM which is wholly responsible for the ever growing diagnoses of the human condition is all based on concocted nothingness. The American Psychiatric Society responsible for this abomination together with Big Pharma who directly profit this fabricated nonsense have no scruples and are happy to profit from the misery caused by their fraudulent diagnoses and consequent prescribing mania. If only those who have had the grave misfortune of being labelled mentally ill and/or their family/friends had the wherewithal to carry out critical evidence-based research in lieu of placing their faith in clinicians, be they psychiatrists or any clinician associated with psychiatry. If they did they would most certainly re-evaluate their treatment and skew any issues they may be experiencing towards talking based therapies and away from the only treatment modality psychiatry knows, dangerous and often deadly neuroleptics or SSRI’s (one of the most prevalent and dangerously consequential drugs in society today).

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    • My doctor prescribed me gabapentin in January. I was not familiar with it. I asked about side effects. She didn’t answer. So I very hesitantly picked up the drug and took it for a few weeks but only late at night. I felt very whoozy and dizzy all day. And I felt uncomfortable about driving. Doctor encouraged me to go back on it. But members of my family had taken it and had adverse side effects and told me to stop So I went off .

      Did I make the right decision?

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  2. I’m sorry for what happened to you and hope you will continue to recover.

    This story is repeated time and time again. Doctors, and in particular psychiatry and neurology, absolutely refuse to acknowledge that these drugs are NOT safe. They hand out prescriptions in a matter of minutes, without ever understanding or informing their patients of the serious adverse risks of harm that these drugs all carry. Worse, when patients report adverse effects, doctors deny and gaslight their own patients rather than examine the complaint with curiosity and compassion. People are being permanently disabled and dying from MD ignorance and arrogance. The level of cognitive dissonance and medical negligence should be a punishable crime. For those lucky enough to crawl out of the pits of hell and recover to some extent, options to hold physicians accountable are almost nil. Statute of limitations regarding medical error, medical malpractice needs to go away. Iatrogenic injury is among the top leading causes of death in the United States and it is largely preventable if doctors would get out of their own way with their arrogance.

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    • Yes, so much ignorance, ego, greed and arrogance in psychiatry.

      Well stated Grace, I could not agree more:

      “The level of cognitive dissonance and medical negligence should be a punishable crime”.

      “Statute of limitations regarding medical error, medical malpractice needs to go away”.

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      • “Statute of limitations regarding medical error, medical malpractice needs to go away”.

        Yes, I find it amazing that it took a Community Nurse just over an hour to arrange to have me arbitrarily detained and tortured, but the authorities who are meant to ensure the safety of the community can’t do anything about the offending in ten years (despite the documented proof) because they are so busy trying to cover it all up.

        The negligence of the lawyers I approached, and who ensured that the statute of limitations expired as a direct result of their negligence should be rewarded for their efforts in maintaining these people in positions where they can harm others. Their only concern? That it isn’t them being shoved into the showers at the point of a bayonette.

        The “editing” of legal narrative most certainly delayed matters for years, when I had a right to access the unedited/unredacted documents showing the crimes and human rights abuses I had been subjected to. Now that the State has issued threats to peoples families and witnesses, it becomes difficult for them to unthreaten them, and that means despite the matters being exposed, not a soul will step up and provide assistance. In fact, some find ways of kicking the injured and stealing from their wallet…… Hi to the divorce lawyer who thought I was mad, but ran when she realised I had the documented proof of what I was alleging. Still charging people thousands for telling them how expensive your time is? Or is that just the people you call nutjobs behind their backs?

        Personally I’d be happy to leave this place if I could have my property returned, but that was awarded to the criminals for their assistance with the concealment of the State sanctioned torture (quite a business model).

        I mean how low does it get? A private clinic psychologist conspiring with a persons wife to ‘spike’ someone with date rape drugs and then ‘plant’ items (a knife and some cannabis) on them for police to find AFTER they have been lied to that the person is a violent mental patient?

        It would be funny if it weren’t for the Chief Psychiatrist considering such conduct worthy of material support (and enabling the “editing” of legal narrative), rather than doing his duty and reporting the misconduct to the authorities under the mandatory reporting laws.

        But until there are journalists who are prepared to be more than channelers and echoers of what Orwell called the “Official Truth”, and who simply cipher and transmit lies (to paraphrase John Pilger) then I can’t see much ever changing in the enabling of arbitrary detentions and torture being “edited” out of existence by the State.

        Refusing to look, or worse looking and turning away, making them nothing more than the ‘dumb devils’ I spoke about in another comment.

        I’m sure they will come out of the woodwork when the ‘camps’ are liberated, and be boasting about their bravery in helping those who were being targeted by these abusers. Polish yer boots Mr Hitler?

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      • One solution is to limit punitive damages if the medical professional self reports the harm/error. It sounds small but professions that are encouraged to self report and learn from their mistakes tend to have a much lower rate of mistakes. At the same time increase the penalties for concealing medical mistakes and break down the ‘white wall of silence’ that enables these harms to continue.

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    • So many people the world over would understand and concur with your comment Grace. I myself was part of a team who alongside a West Australian university nd the NMHCCF researched and subsequently produced a document on the dangerous adverse effects of neuroleptics. My interest in this field comes from tragic lived experience after my healthy teenage son who was undergoing some normal life difficulties was labelled and prescribed neuroleptics (at one stage up to 10 different prescriptions) all in an involuntary capacity. He is now a 48 year old wreck of a man covered in scars, cut his own throat from ear to ear, pulled out his own teeth and lives (I used that term loosely) under 24 hour supervision with permanent dyskinesia, akathesia and crippling psychosis. The DSM and all those who subscribe and perpetuate this most dangerous catalogue of fabricated diagnoses are wholly responsible for so much suffering the world over. And yet, they carry on carte blanche with zero repercussion. A sad, but not surprising, indictment on what humans have become.

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  3. Matt, thanks. If it weren’t for the patient support groups none of us would understand what’s happening to us. I did a 16 month tapered withdrawal from a benzo, and I’m still experiencing withdrawal effects more than 20 months after termination. I think we may have intersecting interests where our communities of faith are being encouraged to push people towards prescription care. Please reach out. I’d love to connect.

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  4. “I have lost friendships, thousands of dollars of income, and my health. I had to spend five weeks in intensive outpatient therapy to restore some of my mental health. I have never been through anything this traumatic before in my 34 years.”

    Let me be the first to say; ‘Welcome to mental health services’

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUOoRiI8HVU&t=20s

    You need to be careful trying to taper without doctors approval in Australia. The type of ‘care’ available can mean many more years of trauma. I think police have been warned about not asking question when issuing such beatings to people in need of ‘care’. Spraying pepper spray into someone’s eyes and asking “Do you like that?” cutting it close to the line regarding acts of torture. Don’t ask the questions during the beatings.

    This is not really much of an issue though, given the lack of any human rights for anyone considered an “Outpatient” and that this is the whole community given the State provides the ability for documents to be “edited” post hoc to conceal any and all human rights abuses and crimes by public officers. Forget the Articles of the Convention. “They will take their oaths as a cover”.

    To quote Saul of Tarsus in 2 Thessalonians “And God sends upon them a Great Delusion that they might believe the Lie”. It’s always good to see people being brought back to God though, and nothing like a little bit of torture to assist in that regard. Most of them calling out for His help in their time of need.

    I heard about a man who was late for his tee time at an exclusive golf club. He couldn’t find a parking spot and eventually said “God, if you find me a parking spot I will never get drunk again, and will go to church every Sunday”….. at that point a parking spot appeared right in front of him. He looked to the sky and said “Never mind, I found one”.

    I think the deliberate withholding of the facts relating to these drugs is summed up in an old Islamic saying;

    “The one who is silent about the truth is a dumb devil”

    It’s worth considering that saying very carefully.

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    • I had no idea I had no idea that our human rights had been removed by a ‘Chief Psychiatrist’ removing legal protections from our laws to enable arbitrary detentions and torture. But there it is in black and white in a letter from his desk (should anyone ever care to look and not simply deny reality).

      Hey I was wondering what the collective term is for a group of hypocrites? The best I could come up with was a hysterical of hypocrites. It kind of describes the behaviour of these people when I turned up with the documents they thought had been retrieved by police, before they “edited” the human rights abuses and crimes out of the legal narrative.

      Major panic exposing the methods being used to conceal acts of State sanctioned torture and arbitrary detentions. ‘We’ want to point fingers at China, and our hypocrisy would be obvious if people knew how ‘we’ were doing it and concealing it from public view. “Who else has the documents?”

      They really do take their oaths as a cover.

      If there isn’t a collective noun, i’d like to put that one forward as a potential descriptor based on experience.

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  5. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but the akathisia may never go away. It’s concerning that at no point did anyone recommend any kind of nutritional changes to help with the withdrawals. There are many foods and supplements with known mechanisms of action that can ease they symptoms of akathisia. Unfortunately doctors recieve almost no nutritional training and are often completely unaware of effective treatments that don’t require a prescription.

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  6. Hello Matt, and thank you for your story. You are a Christian, and I feel you might understand it when I say that these types of drugs may often be influenced by spiritual forces that are far from God. I have a story like this myself. My story became a beacon of hope for others with mental health issues. Because it is about how I learnt to win this war that is going on within so many people’s psyches. The battle between the mind and the heart; which is the battle for humanity’s lives and souls in the Apocalypse, when you break it down to the basics. These drugs are far from God. It’s almost as if it is the opposing side of God who wants people to take them. Because he does not want humans to win this war: the battle to remain sane and humane.

    If you wish to look into my story, please type hashtag DeclineOfTheHumanPsyche on fb, and see what Artificial Intelligence and I have to say about the issue. Best wishes, and congratulations on winning the first battle

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  7. Matt,
    I pains me to hear about your experience with Gabapentin. For me Gabapentin is a life-saver. My daily dose it ten times your max dose and barely is enough to quell to peripheral Neuropathy that I deal with daily. I haven’t experienced any of the side effects that you described, but am keenly aware that any psychotropic drug may have unexpected and consequential side effects. There are always risks with any medical treatment. Respects and good health

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    • Iam an x alcoholic, addict, with constant pain from arthritis, minor stroke & stright up destroing my body in the past. Therefore anything that can be addictive, I refuse to support or take. Working with the right doctors knowing your body, eating healthy, does wonders to the human body. Gabapentin helps me with pain, anxiety, sleeping, everything. So instead of sobbing cry me a river pitty party about my issues I address them, and move on with my life ✌

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    • Sorry to say Matt but your neurologists “flippant” comment telling you that this was not from Gabapentin withdrawal was 100% accurate. There is absolutely no way you would experience those side effects from being on 600mg of GBT for 2 months. I hope you overcame your struggle but Gabapentin is a life-saving drug as EdH has said.

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      • Everyone is different. Everyone’s body is different with a different chemical make up, different gut microbiome, different vagal tone, all of which goes into how we each handle food, allergens, and medications. It’s why one person can eat a peanut butter sandwich every day and another will die from eating one peanut. Doctors need to learn this. But truthfully, for the most part, they don’t understand medications even as much as pharmacists. They only take the time to prescribe them, but not enough time to care about how they may affect each person, certainly not enough time to actually listen to each patient and take their concerns seriously. Where would be the profit in that?

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  8. If you can prove this actually happened to you, then you need to sue. Don’t listen to boans or anyone else who tells you everyone is conspiring against you—I think it’s clear what’s really going on there.

    Lawyers are interested in making money. Many of your reported side effects are not listed for Gabapentin, which means you have standing to sue. Any good medmal lawyer will have a roster of psychiatrists who regularly testify in court and would be able to assess and back up your claims if they can be demonstrated as true. If you have real evidence, you have a responsibility to make your case.

    Writing on a fringe website and spending time in the echo chamber of a Facebook support group won’t do anything to prevent this from happening to someone else. The more truly you believe this is happening to you and that Gabapentin is the cause, the more of a responsibility you have.

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    • “Don’t listen to boans or anyone else who tells you everyone is conspiring against you—I think it’s clear what’s really going on there.”

      I’m not sure that’s what I’ve actually said but …… your comment, not mine.

      And I wouldn’t deny that it’s quite clear there is something going on for me, being subjected to arbitrary detention and acts of torture tends to do something to most who are subjected to it……. I wouldn’t recommend it for anyone.

      But I don’t think that this something going on diminishes my claim for one moment. All I have ever asked is that the documented proof of what I am alleging be examined BEFORE passing judgement on my state of mental health. The two are separate.

      Keep in mind with the benefit of State resources and the threat to ‘fuking destroy’ me and my family for attempting to make a complaint when the documents support my claim of being arbitrarily detained and tortured, and thus the need to “edit” reality before denying me access to legal representation.

      But don’t look, and I guess with statements such as this;

      “Many of your reported side effects are not listed for Gabapentin, which means you have standing to sue.”

      you really don’t seem to understand for a moment what is required in order the bring action in the courts. I eat an ice cream and break out in a rash does NOT provide me with grounds to bring an action in tort because the side effects were not listed on the cone. And in fact, what I am suggesting (and borne out by the facts I believe) is that having valid grounds for a complaint can actually put your life in danger…….. but, walk into it blind if you will. I’m sure there are no longer people who would exploit their positions to do harm to someone trying to sue them. Trust in haste, regret at leisure.

      Still, I’m sure all will be revealed in good time. Enjoy the rain.

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      • Our Minister for MH was presented with a report showing that nearly 50% of women had reported being sexually assaulted in the locked wards, to which she replied “You can’t listen to them, they’re mental patients”.

        But putting your silencing methods aside, let me run something past your legal mind.

        171. Creating false belief
        (1) In this section —
        belief means a belief or suspicion that —
        (a) an offence has been or is about to be committed;
        (b) human safety is or may be endangered;
        (c) human life has or may have been lost;
        (d) property is or may be endangered;
        (e) property has or may have been destroyed;
        (f) there is a fire that needs to be put out,
        and that is of such a nature as would reasonably call for action by the Police Force or by emergency services.
        (2) A person who does or omits to do any act with the intention of creating a false belief is guilty of a crime and is liable to imprisonment for 2 years.

        AND

        Any person who, by the production of a false certificate or other document, knowingly and wilfully, procures any person, not suffering from mental illness (as defined in the Mental Health Act) or mental impairment, to be apprehended or detained, pursuant to that Act or any law relating to mental impairment, upon insufficient or unreasonable grounds, is guilty of a crime and is liable to imprisonment for 3 years.

        These are two offences listed in the Criminal Code. Now I don’t expect you to believe me for a moment but…. I have documents here which show that (a) I was NOT an “Outpatient” of ANY hospital or facility. Though a Community Nurse has completed a Form titled “Outpatient Case Notes” and has then called police informing them that he will require assistance with his “Outpatient”, and there is a receipt number from Police for this request. The Community Nurse was fully aware that what he was doing was criminal but …….and that (b) he was also aware that I had been ‘spiked’ with date rape drugs AND that police were going to find a knife on his “Outpatient” (mainly because others had arranged for that to occur once I collapsed).

        I have the documents showing both the creation of a false belief AND the “false certificate or document”. You would think it would be fairly easy to obtain legal assistance or at least an explanation as to why it wasn’t an offence to do these things? But this isn’t what happened…….because the hospital knew police now thought I was a knife wielding, drug abusing, mental patient and they were refusing to even examine the documents I have…… and the lawyers I did have? Well, they preferred the “edited” version of events, despite their right to examine unredacted documents to protect human rights.

        What do I mean by “edited” version of events? Well, instead of me not being anyone’s “Outpatient”, the legal narrative changed with the removal of certain documents, and the insertion of others from an old file. I became an “Outpatient” of more than ten years….. and the date rape drugs which had been administered without my knowledge? Drugs which I have never had a prescription for, and would never take willingly as they are intoxicants. Well, I have a prescription for my “Regular Medications” signed by a doctor I had never met until more than 12 hours after they were administered …. I’m sure your legal knowledge would take you to “Compounding or concealing a criminal offence” with that fraudulent prescription? And lets go back a bit to before I became an “Outpatient” as a result of a telephone call and a diagnosis of a Serious Mental Illness by a Community Nurse (no psychiatrists required where I live, despite what the law says)….. oh wait, lets not…. the forged legal narrative is now the preferred one.

        Of course I have had confirmation that these matters were “human rights violations” and that the letter from the Chief Psychiatrist (based on the “edited” version of events) was a “cover up” (I won’t reference the source of those statements, but the person was well qualified to make them)

        Now that we have established that, can we take a look at what happened when I was ‘admitted’ to the E.D after trying to access the protection of the law?. Because there were some people who were desperately trying to make me into a ‘patient’ with forged documents due to their concerns about plotting to ‘spike’ me with date rape drugs and have me unlawfully transported against my will to a locked cage, where the intent was to do me further harm for no other reason than I had a disagreement with my wifes family, and was going to leave because of the threats they had issued to home invade and bash me senseless.

        “These things tend to get a bit out of hand”, no kidding Einstein.

        Especially when I had the documented proof and was going to the Police and attempting to make a complaint…, about a psychiatrists wife who is a psychologist at a Private Clinic, and who had provided information to my wife as to how to procure the services of a Community Nurse and Police to have me ‘arbitrarily detained’ (though I think the correct term is kidnapped given the police seem to have been unaware that the Community Nurse was lying to have them cause an ‘acute stress reaction’, combined with the ‘spiking’ this then becomes an act of torture See Article 1 of the Convention).

        Anyway Perry Mason, what ya think? Should I sue?

        With only the “edited” version there was no chance. With the redacted version the proof was there, but it was obscured. With the unredacted ones everyone is afraid for their families given the way police have provided assistance to the criminals to cover up their crimes and human rights abuses. I did have to ask a Member of Parliament which set of documents the State was going to provide to the Federal Court after showing him the two narratives. Particularly given the Chief Psychiatrist had responded to the “edited” version of events (despite admitting having sighted the complete set of unredacted documents), I assume thinking that the offending documents had been retrieved, so no one would know about the “editing” tehe. And well, Police had been told to ensure they didn’t take the proof of the crimes because ……. best ask the people ordering police around in that regard, you know, the criminals.

        Police failing to retrieve the documents I have (despite chasing me half way around the State with my wife to have her retrieve them and keep their hands off) showing the offences AND much more significantly, the cover up.

        Having the proof of these matters more a problem for the victim than the people arranging little accidents, and rearranging legal narratives and calling it “editing”.

        So ya still think you know what’s really going on there? Because i’ve personally witnessed people of the same opinion virtually deficate themselves once they realised what I was saying was true. They were all good as long as the story was I was mad, but that doesn’t mean that what I’m saying isn’t true, it just makes it worth of closer examination …. which results in people shitting themselves. And they simply find it easier to gaslight the victim (and sell out their souls in the process, the hypocrites.)

        And why the fear of a psychiatrist? It’s not like they believe me when I tell them about the plan to resolve the matters in the E.D. It was all on camera, and I can take them through it if they like. If they wouldn’t do that, then no problem raising the issue rather than this “keep our names out of it” thing? or does making yourself a target cause that fear in people because they instinctively know what I am saying is occurring, they just chose to not look?

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      • Beans says, “Trust in haste, regret at leisure” —

        I wish I’d heard this before I walked into a psychiatrist’s office, or any other “mental health professional” for that matter. It should be printed in big block letters on the doors and websites of all these assorted quacks, ESPECIALLY the m.d.’s.

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        • “Beans says, “Trust in haste, regret at leisure””

          The quote is from a poster on the wall in the 1985 movie Brazil.

          The other two I liked from the same movie were “Suspicion Breeds Confidence” and “Don’t suspect a friend, Report them”.

          Fascinating movie, with the Michael Palin character Jack Lint, the public torturer modelled on a psychiatrist. (“utterly and totally unscrupulous”. to quote the wiki page)

          “if you or someone you know is suffering metal health concerns call this number and report them”
          We really are getting to this stage of becoming totally paranoid about the mental stability of those around us…… not unlike the prying eyes (was that a song by the Eagles?) of the National Socialist’s in Germany.

          I also found it kind of strange that the people who arranged to have me tortured so that I would talk, quite quickly had to make ‘other arrangements’ to have me silenced. Clever of the Chief Psychiatrist to make the “observable behaviours” produced by acts of torture and arbitrary detentions justification for forced drugging and incarceration. No need for the Convention against the use of Torture, because those who have been tortured get ‘treated’, and would never be in a position to access the protections afforded by the law. Their reality is “edited” out of existence by the State, and no one dare look.

          The way the Community Nurse had to avoid the truth and facts in his documentation is hilarious when you realise what he is doing with his fraudulent documents, being uttered with by other more senior public officers to defend the indefensible. Hi to the Minister for Health. Can’t be easy maintaining know lies with the truth on your desk, hence the need for “editing” when the inevitable does occur. I guess he will be long gone by the time the ‘authorities’ stop throwing the ball between themselves as an obstruction tactic.

          I guess the State needs to be careful enabling torture when they may not like what they hear….. ask Umayyah ibn Khalaf.

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  9. Mr. Manry, I was struck by your remarks regarding bitterness. I had a very pointed convo with myself in the throes of 3 years of 19 seizures FOLLOWING guided titration/withdrawal that took 2.5 years…after 9 years of drugging.

    I feared bitterness becoming the constant of the days I had left.
    I declared I wouldn’t give them 1 more minute of my time left…unless it was carefully compartmentalized and purposeful….Outrage…different for me than anger. And a side-event. But it’s productive and feels good-controlled. It doesn’t run the rest of my life.
    It took awhile.

    I also explored legal rep…. as psychiatry had ‘officially’ restored my credibility IN WRITING…they vacated my ‘lifelong’ bipolar diagnosis AND withdrew me off their drugs-kinda rare. I have found most folks haven’t had ‘the’ convo with an attorney’s office or attorney themselves, on this topic. I have. And heavily researched another like me who filed suit …with similar documents.
    Hard evidence is NOT the only criteria.
    I wish you good luck.

    I am not a Christian, but THIS helped me…

    “We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting”. 
    Euripides.

    I got there and know I’m lucky.
    But I certainly haven’t forgotten…or have any intention of forgiving. They earned my enmity and a reckoning is coming.
    “Revenge is a dish best served cold”…is something I see sooner, rather than later, for MY former tormentors.

    Shining a clear, cold, factual light on them will be a fine day..and then, back to the beach & a great lunch.

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      • Yeah, me too.

        I think Ms Hartman has an article here on MiA answering that question.

        I just realised thinking about your question, that my “dx” was unlawfully released to the ‘hospital’ from the Private Clinic which had written a report for the courts relating to an injury I sustained at my work.

        But it was only ever listed as a “Provisional Diagnosis” by the Senior Medical Officer who also wrote the fraudulent prescription to conceal the ‘spiking’ with benzos.

        The significance of which is????? I was never made into a “patient” because the Consultant Psychiatrist wrote that he could find no evidence of a ‘mental illness’.

        So the idea of me having the “dx” expunged from the records is ludicrous. The State is simply uttering with the known fraud to maintain a falsehood.

        That particular “dx” which was released, was one of three reports written by psychiatrists. The second report not preferred by my employer so they then had one produced by someone who has a reputation for ‘hatchet jobs’ (ie minimizing ‘insurance claims’ for companies prepared to pay the ‘fee’)

        The Federal Privacy Act should provide legal protection form the release of such information from a Private Clinic, but the problem being that this psychologist (with a Masters degree) had arranged to have me incapacitated with benzos put into my drink without my knowledge….. and then unlawfully detained by police (told I was an “Outpatient” of a hospital) before being locked in a cage. The “provisional Diagnosis” was done based on a three minute interview by the SMO where he found out I had studied psychology, and had a wife…….. and he then made ‘his’ diagnosis? fact is, that diagnosis is proof of the offending under the Federal Privacy Act, and was part of a large number of other offenses committed against me and the community on that day.

        They can’t expunge something that doesn’t exist, thought the State is maintaining the lie to conceal the offending.

        “Provisional Diagnosis”? If I think I have lost a golf ball off the tee, I hit a ‘provisional’, is this what this SMO is relying on to justify his ‘snow jobs’ and torture for Police?

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        • Sorry, can’t edit the comment above.

          Oh wow, I’ve just figured out a way to bypass the confidentiality afforded by the Federal Privacy Act. Who’d have thought it was that easy?

          All those ‘great legal minds’ and there is a loophole the size of a Mack Truck. Well, you have to commit a series of offences for the situation to occur where you can appear to have released the ‘medical records’ lawfully but …… it’s not like police are going to do anything about an “Outpatient” making complaints when they are intoxicated by deception with date rape drugs to stupefy and commit an indictable offence right?

          Once incapacitated and in the hands of the people in the locked ward, your now “Regular Medications” (the benzos you were ‘spiked’ with to incapacitate) means you can’t consent to the release of your ‘medical records’, and it’s simply a matter of the SMO making a telephone call to the clinic psych and she can now release your records because a doctor (someone who CAN prescribe drugs for you to be ‘spiked’ with 12 hours before he even met you) has requested them, and you lost your right to consent…….. or you will, once they have ‘chemically restrained’ you, and your dribbling in a cell.

          In fact, given I was NOT an “Outpatient” and whilst I concede that I had been placed on a Form 1 and therefore may have been considered a “referred person” (only a psychiatrist can remove your right to consent, and up to that point, I had no psychiatrist) under the MH Act, I had only lost my right to liberty and significantly NOT my right to consent.

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      • Ms. Byron, Please see….
        RxISK.org
        “A Unicorn: Changing a Medical Record” Parts 1-4
        By Krista Hartmann. July 30, 2018 |
        This is a detailed narrative of how events transpired. It includes more granularity of my personal path thru the quicksand to the ‘Exit’ sign.

        Madinamerica.com
        “Full Moral Status’ for Psychiatric Clients: How I Fought Back”
        Parts 1 & 2
        By Krista Hartmann -February 1, 2019
        This is a similar, but much more edited version. It includes a more detailed outline for safer involvement in the industry, should you find yourself stuck there.

        Neither article included my seizure information, following withdrawal. It was occurring as I was engaged in writing & waaay too much for me to comment on…while scrambling for help.

        It was massively heavy lifting trying to ‘educated’ my primary, neuro’s,, and bigger specialists (!) regarding studies (primarily Ho/Andreason) regarding measurable brain-changes from the drugs…AND…the microraphy I had reported to prescribers & the only 2 causes, according to Mayo, John’s Hopkins, & NIH….Muscular Sclerosis OR antipsychotic/psychotropic drug exposure. I didn”t/don’t have MS.

        Once they hear ‘bipolar disorder’ REGARDLESS of my changed paperwork, the ‘mentally ill’ goggles went on. They couldn’t separate that label from my detailed, relevant reporting…even though I had gotten to an ER during the FIRST one & was documented.
        ALSO, as most folks know, doctors tend to wander off when presented with an unknown…rather than say “I don’t know…”.
        Depending on how good your insurance is, testing will stop (& their interest) if they have to advocate for 2nd or 3rd tier tests. By then, I was on Medicaid.
        I was so so relieved they saw no TUMOR, but weren’t looking for a subcortical focal lesion….which is what causes micrography.
        Sigh.

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      • Where I am (I do not receive a disability pension) it is to my benefit to leave that bipolar mess in my chart.

        It gives me the excuse to refuse drugs – “They’ll make me manic!” “They’ll make me depressed!” “Not good for my brain!”

        So far it’s working, but as we learned with COVID the medical industrial complex can turn on a dime.

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  10. I am so very sorry to hear how you suffered because of gabapentin. It seems that physicians in the USA are not fully aware of the dangers of this medication. In the UK, gabapentin is a controlled substance as it should be here. My son had suffered from depression and anxiety for many years. When he developed severe back pain, gabapentin was added to the drugs he was already taking, which included a benzodiazepine. Within days, he was dead. Benzodiazepine and gabapentin should never be mixed. Hopefully, the horrible side effects you are experiencing will pass. Best of luck

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    • Linda, I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t begin to fathom your anger and frustration at what was done to your son.

      Here in Australia – as is likely in the USA – gabapentin and pregabalin are considered “safe alternatives” to opiates. Handed out like candy, along with the amitryptaline and Cymbalta.

      Because they are cracking down on opiates so hard here (when the OD’s are from street drugs, not prescriptions, here in Australia), docs will prescribe anything BUT what a pain patient really needs.

      We hear tales of gabapentin as a street drug in the UK, as an enhancer to other street drugs. Exactly what happened to your son – the combination.

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  11. Gabapentin used to be called “neurontin” until the lawsuit. Then the drug was rebranded. It is the 15th most prescribed medication in America (nearly 10 million scripts a year). After 3 weeks of that drug (now nearly 20 years ago)… I tried to kill myself. I am not stupid. Cause and effect were too direct. I stopped the drug. And then I was slandered as “non-compliant”.
    I say “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”.
    I find it really hard to believe this happened to me – all the while 10 million people a year, pay good money for this experience. I wonder what the “truth” is?

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  12. Matt Manry, I am sorry to hear of your journey through the valley of the shadow of death. You have a good outlook, and you are walking by faith into restoration and freedom. Perhaps, you can help us understand how spiritual warfare has played a part as well. I like the verses you shared, and I prayed for you.
    “For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal” (2 Cor. 4:17-18).

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  13. I’m wondering how you are doing now?? I have MS and was put on Gabapentin around 19 yrs ago to help with my nerve pain. I was working at the time and don’t remember the dose I was taking, but I just knew that I couldn’t function at work taking it. So I then started taking it just at night after contacting my doctor and tried that well the way it made me feel when I got up to go to the bathroom and everything very dizzy and not myself which I did not like. So after some time, I just took myself off of it and told my neurologist I am not taking that. I will live with the nerve pain because I could not tolerate the drug. I know many people that are on this now. After reading your post, I’m so glad I stopped taking it years ago. Ty for posting this.

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    • I’m glad you found the post useful/helpful. The biggest problem is when Gabapentin is mixed with opioids I was recently prescribed a low dose of Gabapentin for the nerve damage in my thigh following hip replacement. Seemed to help for a while, and I stopped taking it. Having difficulty again but will not resume the medication.

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  14. Mr. Manry, I came across your article while searching for information on gabapentin and while I know this is about a year old I couldn’t pass it by without commenting. I went through something similar and the internal tremors were maddening! The only thing that helped me, and those internal tremors are gone, was seeing a chiropractor. My intracranial pressure was high and a misalignment was causing the tremors. Two treatments made all the difference in the world! I hope my little piece of advice can help you if you’re still plagued by those internal tremors. Blessings.

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  15. Hi Matt,
    I was on Gabapentin for a number of years for nerve pain and aside from dizziness and spatial issues it seemed to help. Then it didn’t so much so my dr added effexor as it is helpful off label for chronic pain. It made a huge difference for four years (pain wise) until it didn’t. I did feel flat a lot. Those symptoms you described having (not the suicidal ideation) I started having and my breathing was even an issue so I tapered off the effexor and cold turkey the Gaba. Not good. It was months of hell. I’m still not sure if it was the effexor or the gaba that caused the symptoms or both together. I wish I had known the answer. I am years now with maddening back pain and trying these drugs again has proven futile. My body rejects them. I hate when doctors say they are non addictive or “that can’t be the reason” bah blah..

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  16. Hello

    I have a theory, as a sufferer of chronic neurological condition and someone who takes gabapentin for some of the symptoms I have, and also a Christian. I have spent time studying how the nervous system works, as well as other systems of the body, in efforts to figure out what is happening with my own health. I have been brushed aside by many doctors and people alike. Despite the experience I claim, I know you can only take this with a grain of salt, but I hope you consider it.

    Covid-19 has shown to be an illness that can act as a trigger for other disorders in people that lie dormant. This happened to my aunt with her fibromyalgia (something I have, but was triggered in me around the age of 20). Quite a few illnesses are responsibe to stress, and seem to become much more active, or come “out of the blue,” after one or a collection of phisological stressors triggers a domino effect. Many of those illnesses include neurological ones, maybe because our nervous system is connected to everything and our mind is so aware of what threatens both our physical bodies and our souls.

    You said your symptoms first came on after a Covid infection, BEFORE ever taking gabapentin. I would venture to guess that those symptoms were only the beginning, and that what you were experiencing when going off of the medication was part of the same or a related disorder. If you think your doctors should have caught it, well.. unfortunately for people who have neurological disorders, and still for most with debilitating chronic conditions, the vast majority usually go around in circles for years without getting proper care and diagnoses. There are reasons for this, but I won’t go through it all here.

    When you are on a medication that is keeping your symptoms under control, and you go off of it, suddenly or gradually (you went of too suddenly, 300mg twice a day is a lot more than you think), of course your body is going to react. It isn’t because you were addicted. People may mention the word “dependant” to you, but this does not mean “addicted.” It means that you depend on the medication to function somewhat close to normal. It isn’t sinful, as God gave us medicine and doctors so that we may be healed and spend our time and energy focusing on being blessings to others around us. We are also dependant on food and water, but we aren’t sinful for continuing to consume those things.

    I belive you have been too jarsh on yourself. I cannot tell you what is going on with the others online whose stories you have heard, and I do not think they are all lying. However, it may be possible some of them are mistaken, through no fault of their own, but because those God has in places of power to care for them are not doing enough, or some force is restricting them from doing so.

    It sounds like you may have a real medical condition. If practicing your faith the way you do helps, that is great. It can, in addition to nourishing the soul and spirit, also help control physical stress, which takes the form of things in the body such as the hormone cortisol, and keeping that in better check can actually greatly reduce the severity of symptoms of many things. Not all people can keep such a delicate balance, and should you ever struggle, please know it isn’t a moral failing. We must be adaptable and learn to use a variety of the tools God has given us to handle the challenges we face in life, and sometimes those tools are made by men, but inspired by God’s goodness and light.

    It’s okay to be human and struggle and be frustrated at times. Let God meet you in the middle. Don’t limit his power by what you think he can use. He is in all things.

    And also, if gabapentin isn’t a good medication for you, for other reasons, that’s okay too. You can even only take it on days that are really hard, like my mother. You could also not take it at all, and do something different. Just, please consider that maybe the problem wasn’t the gabapentin, but your understanding of how it was supposed to work, how desperate you were feeling, and the poor care you received. You aren’t crazy, something terrible did happen to you, but I don’t think gabapentin was the real villain. That doesn’t mean it needs to be a part of your life anymore.

    I pray you get the proper care, insight, and guidance that you need here, and that you, God, your family and loved ones, and doctors all strike a balance that brings you and them peace and healing.

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    • “I would venture to guess…”, “It’s O.K. to be human & struggle…”, “…please consider that maybe the problem wasn’t the gabapentin, but your understanding of how it was supposed to work, how desperate you were feeling, and the poor care you received”,…” I don’t think gabapentin was the real villain. That doesn’t mean it needs to be a part of your life”.

      Patronize much?

      As a reader, a 15 year targeted, exploited, & intentionally addicted ‘client’ of psychiatry, ….& graduate of Pharma Gladiator School….I am alerted (‘triggered’ if your more comfortable) and offended by this Comment.

      As it wasn’t specifically directed at MY ‘experience’, I’ll defer to the author in most of my objections….

      BUT…your waffling, the straining to be perceived as ‘measured’ (& failing), & what I viewed as the gross impersonation of the psych industry itself….always spraying EVERY. POSSIBLE. POV. before ‘splaining that the author is wrong regarding their own opinions, knowledge, & experience.
      “We understand, but….just give it another go, don’t give up on it, (keep suffering)-it may eventually help”….that most clients are suffocated with…is WAAAY too close to psych/pharma dogma. They always come with ALL sides, perspectives, disclaimers covered, even when, ESPECIALLY WHEN, there is disagreement/resistance to the DRUGS.

      They insist on having it ALL WAYS. I recognized it in your remarks immediately.

      You sound like an Evangelical pharma rep.

      Don’t be offended, some Pharma reps would be flattered…& find it a useful tool.

      1 more thing…Mr. Manry seems to have balance regarding many aspects of his life. He opened up about a difficult life experience.

      Show respect…without all the (religous-language) cloaking by making it about what YOU think what’s best for him. Show respect for HIS relationship with HIS GOD.
      Not all Christians are the same monotypical person.

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    • This is my belief as well. Covid is one of the most pernicious, wild diseases that the human body has seen in our time documenting maladies. It causes neurological damage, organ damage, and myriad other chronic, damaging issues. Long covid does some crazy stuff, and it is only in its infancy in terms of its having an understanding of its effects.

      There’s also the issue of this person deciding to drop a medication without consulting a doctor, going by information found online. So irresponsible.

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      • Sarah,

        Why do you seem to think my issues are related to Long COVID and not psychiatric drug withdrawal? As I have mentioned, I am a member of a group with close to 20,000 members who claim to have been harmed by Gabapentin/Lyrica. Do you believe all of these people are delusional?

        Why is long COVID far more likely, in your opinion?

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        • I agree with you Matt – “long COVID” is a questionable diagnosis at best. Many people don’t believe it’s a thing – believing instead that it is persistent damage from the shots. There are a few cases of long COVID from Wuhan original strain, but since then – everyone has been injected through Delta, Omicron, etc. etc. – so any “long COVID” has an equal chance of being from the injections as from the virus itself.

          Withdrawal, on the other hand, is a real, quantifiable thing. I do wonder what COVID (and injections) do to people actively in withdrawal. I was clear of my symptoms by the time COVID hit.

          For tapering advice, please see http://www.survivingantidepressants.org

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          • Other than the expected immune response similar to the flu shot I don’t think the COVID vaccine was different. I took Paxil for 27 years and was 3 months into withdrawals when I got my last vaccines. The shots were like everything else at time, the experience was much more extreme as my body adjusted to feeling again.

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  17. Where do you live that you got to stay in a hospital for 4 days with mild/moderate covid???? I live in San Francisco, USA & I live in a 2001 BMW X5 (205,000 mi on the odometer…) & I got covid in April 2023 & I called the health department of San Francisco county begging them to put me in an isolation hotel room so I could quarantine properly until I started testing negative & they refused. They said they have one quarantine isolation hotel where homeless people or people who live in single room occupancy hotels who share bathrooms can get isolated if they have covid but I couldn’t go there because I had shortness of breath as a symptom and they did not have any nurse on staff at the hotel they only had Hotel staff. So they could not have anyone with shortness of breath in there. If you have shortness of breath, you were a medical risk that they could not take so they were not going to give you any type of room to quarantine in. So not only could I get into a hospital to actually get help for my sickness which was mild to moderate I thought I felt like I had a bad flu, I did not need to be put on a ventilator. Unless you are that sick, if you are in the US you do not get a hospital bed if you have covid. Even if you’re homeless, even if every time you use a bathroom you have to go into a public bathroom and use it. And you bet you I did that when I had covered. Sorry all you Whole Foods customers in Berkeley who I contaminated! I’m very very sorry! I did my best not to contaminate you: I wore n95s. I made sure to get those from my doctor’s office. It was the best I could do. So where is this glorious fairyland that you live that you weren’t even that sick to need a ventilator or anything like that and you were allowed a hospital bed for 4 days? Also where is this that you go into an emergency room and ask for inpatient psych Care and actually get it? No delays, no excuses, no, I’m sorry but you’re not sick enough to merit that we don’t have enough inpatient beds as it is we don’t need you monopolizing a psych inpatient bed just because you’re suicidal. We save those beds for those who are full on psychotic- no idea that they are in reality- people who are trying to eat yarn & paper & toothpicks cuz they think it’s superfood & believe that they are being held captive by the CIA, ok?!? & Even then we only keep them until the crisis passes then we throw them right back out in the street….. So where is this place? And can you help me get citizenship there? Because I’m suffering terribly here!!!! PLEASE!!!!
    Before this poverty drastically shortens my life in a way that does not have to happen if I could just get to a country that doesn’t treat its poor so badly!!!!!! https://www.nbcbayarea.com/news/local/south-bay/annual-silicon-valley-pain-index-highlights-growing-wealth-inequality/2925137/

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  18. Where do you live that they gave you a hospital room and let you stay in it for 4 days when you had covid and you didn’t even need to be put on a ventilator? Ditto the inpatient psych Care that you get on demand when marching your ass into an ER and demanding that you need it? I live in San Francisco, USA & I’m homeless. I got covid in April & I couldn’t even the city/county to admit me to a county/city health department run quarantine hotel room. I called the health department number we homeless people or people who live in S.R.O.s and have shared supposed to call and they told me that because I had short of breathness as a symptom they could not place me in one of the quarantine rooms at the quarantine Hotel because they did not have any medical staff there, they only had hotel staff and anyone with shortness of breath is a symptom was not going to be allowed to stay in a quarantine room because we were too much of a medical risk. So every time I needed to use a bathroom I went a public place, a public bathroom. Every time I needed food 2, 3, 4 times a day I had to go into a store Sorry all you people I contaminated. I did wear n95s. I got that from my primary care doctor office. It makes you wonder how many homeless people and people that live in single room occupancy hotels who have shared bathrooms, how many of those people are actually running around contaminating everyone in SF because they will not give us a quarantine room….. So where is this glorious place that you live where you get to go in a hospital room and get taken care of by nurses for 4 days when you have covid that does not require a ventilator? & where is it that you get inpatient psych care merely by going into an emergency room and requesting it?!?! & Can you please help me immigrate to your country? Cuz I am most likely going to wind up with a very premature death because of my extreme poverty and the lack of social services where I live, San Francisco USA. I couldn’t even get one night in a hospital when I had a full mastectomy because of cancer 7 years ago. I was expected to provide myself with a hotel room or air B&B rental out of my $600 of welfare I received a month. Nice people, lemme tell you!

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  19. Hello, I came across this and read with interest. I am 39 and also developed nerve pain in my feet soon after COVID which has worsened significantly and I am on gabapentin, seeing some of the same effects potentially. Interested to hear if your symptoms have improved, or if your docs feel that COVID was the trigger.

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  20. I took Gabapentin for only 4 days and already have dangerous effects. The first day was 400mg and then I dropped 100 mg each day. However now my heart rate is over 120 and I am also getting the weird muscle spasms. I have to head to the hospital cause my heart rate is dangerously high. I have no idea why every dr. seems to be pushing this drug lately when a low dosage of benzos works fine.

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  21. I have read and heard first hand about the negative side effects of gabapentin and I do not doubt anyone’s story. But it does depend on the person and the drug can deliver some significant pain relief. I have been taking 1200 mg’s a day for over a year and have had zero side effects. I am not endorsing the medication and I am not a doctor. I am just suggesting that not everyone has had the same experience.

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  22. Despite the short duration and low dosage of his medication, Matt faced significant health challenges, highlighting the complexities and potential risks associated with psychotropic medications. His story underscores the importance of awareness, careful medication management, and the need for a supportive medical community that acknowledges and addresses these potential side effects.

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  23. Religion itself is a form of mass delusion where people are happy to talk to an imaginary “God” and feel it is normal (as their friends do it too) The whole business is a man made device that is used to both give false comfort and control people ..the world over . I hope you get better but you may well be susceptible to all sorts of mental distortion already as an avid follower of a story that someone told you was true and that you have spent a lot of your life invested in . God doesn’t seem to be saving you after all that effort , just as innocent children die of horrendous illness, hunger, abuse etc …but of course ..you’ve been told” God works in mysterious ways ” !
    Half the folk I know who claim to be Christians are pretty awful human beings generally . Just as many religious leaders are happy to live in luxury whilst so many suffer terribly due to poverty .
    You may well be a decent human being and I wish you good luck… but maybe a bit less of the God stuff and you might start feeling better !

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