Friday, November 22, 2019

Comments by mizchulita

Showing 10 of 10 comments.

  • Faith, thank you so much for showing me the Icarus Project. I visited the forums and was amazed to read how people struggle in similar ways to my sons.

    Jonah, thank you for the links you’ve provided. I’m looking forward to watching the video when I get an opportunity. I love your perspective on my sons — they are treasures, I believe. <3

    Regarding assumptions, well, I would be hard-pressed not to make them myself. Fact is, some things just suck. My sons seeing demons is one of those things. My younger son has auditory, visual, tactile and olfactory hallucinations. He has described being eviscerated by demons and feeling every bit of it. It is indeed a horror.

    Yet I am thankful for the beauty in my life and theirs. One thing this whole business has taught me is that everyone carries around a goodly amount of pain. We relate to some people's more than others due to our own experiences, I'm sure. So I don't feel my pain is special in any way, but it is indeed pain. It is heavy. So is what a lot of other people deal with. It is what it is.

    I appreciate the empathy, information, referrals and visualization of light and protection so very much.

    I think when we simply love one another, the badness has to retreat — at least a little.

  • Thank you for your comment and the links. 🙂 I have heard of her as well as the boy who inspired the book “Heaven Is for Real.” I heard of both of these people after I shared some of my son’s visions.

    I am astounded, just amazed, at the similarities between experiences.

    I wish it were all light, though. Sadly, if my son were to paint, there would be more of demons than heaven. He is embroiled in a spiritual warfare more vivid and concrete than most of us ever consciously experience.

    As a mother, I wish I could protect him from this.

    Strangely, ever since all this has started happening, I myself have had other-dimensional experiences.

    Very few people have any level of understanding about these things. And the more I learn, the less I know.

    There are all kinds of people who think they have the answer. Then there are the people who tell me they are happy that it is my family and not their own, that experiences this stuff.

    My older son also communicates with spirits. It is all very dark for him as well. For him, it is a choice. Both of my sons, however, are very sensitive souls who love deeply and hate injustice, exploitation, evil.

    One thing I have learned. The name of Jesus is very powerful. I have seen a demon leave its harassing of my younger son from hearing his name. His name is so threatening to this darkness that one of the entities put a spell on my younger son so he would not be able to say his name out loud.

    I am fully aware aware just how nuts this all sounds, even to people who are more open-minded than most.

    It can be a very lonely experience.

  • Oh, this. “How might their stories have been different if they’d had someone to talk with, someone to listen to them, to support them in figuring out what their thoughts and feelings meant to them in relation to what was in their hearts?”

    My 14-year-old son has been having hallucinations since he was 11. The doctors say schiz, but that was difficult to believe when he was quoting things out of the book of Revelation at a time when we did not attend church.

    So I’ve looked for guidance. I’ve looked to counselors, pastors and friends. There really isn’t much out there. People don’t believe there is a reality to the hallucinations, or, if they do believe, they are frightened or feel at a loss as to what to do. We’ve been very fortunate that one of my friends has an open mind so that he has someone besides myself to talk to about his experiences without having a label tacked on him.

    Thank you for your thoughts on this issue.

  • I have spent the past two years withdrawing from a 4mg a day Ativan habit that lasted 12 years. I seem “stuck” at half a milligram. It is just awful, these days when I wonder if I’ll ever be free of it. My heart goes out to you going through this with two young children. The bright side, though? You’ll remember their childhoods.

  • Here is the family’s Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/janifoundation?ref=ts&fref=ts

    I resisted medicating my son for three years. Along with the voices, he had painful tactile hallucinations and frightening visual hallucinations. An array of therapists did not help. He is on meds now, which makes me very sad. However, he is no longer tormented by seeing demons cutting off people’s heads, for example. I’m hoping that the new therapist will be able to help him resolve this stuff. My guess is that Jani’s family is simply beside themselves, as am I. My heart goes out to them.

  • I read an article by you in Outside magazine, I think it was. I almost wrote you a letter. I’ve been wondering how you were. I am ALMOST off benzos after a two year taper. I was on them for 12 years. It’s hard.

    You’re so right on with what you’re telling people about psychiatrists and these drugs. Can’t wait for the book.

  • LOL at large aquarium sounds. I’ve had “benzo belly” and looked as though I was nine months pregnant. :/

    I plateaued for several months. During that time, I started feeling really great. It was hard, but I started my taper once again.

    I’ve also had the experience of doctors having no clue, thinking you can up and quit after 4 mg of Ativan for 12 years.

    As far as the Existential Cafe goes, been there. Jesus Christ took me out.

    Keep spreading the word. People need to hear the truth about this poison. Wishing you much peace.

  • I have a similar story. I took Xanax and Ativan for 12 years, according to how the prescription was written. I have also spent two years struggling to get off Ativan. I have reduced the dose from 4 mg to .75 at this point.

    The weirdest thing is that my mental health is much better, even though I suffer from some horrendous physical symptoms. A lot of fears that I have disappeared. It was really toxic, and I had no idea.