Tuesday, January 31, 2023

Comments by abbynardo

Showing 10 of 10 comments.

  • I bet Dad was thinking the same thing. That’s what was so damn hard about this. He had SO much more to say, but his lungs weren’t having it. I was thinking that it might be a good idea to host a discussion forum on his site to talk about what he wrote. My only hesitation is that I absolutely don’t want to moderate.

  • That’s when Psychiatry started. I can’t recall when Psychoanalysis started. I’m currently on the hunt for his CV from Emory. I just know that I already knew how to spell the word “psychoanalyst” by the 6th grade. I recall bringing Dad into my Gifted & Talented class as part of my presentation on Dreams for a special project.

    Want to know something funny? My big rebellion was that I trained as a behaviorist. Actually, he never cared that I went into his field. Until I was 23, I was an Oberlin-trained soprano, but then I bailed on grad school for Vocal Performance and went back to Georgia State University while living in my parents’ basement. My path to Psychology had far more to do with my own ADHD than with Dad’s job. That and I am also pretty skilled in the area of behavioral observation (a useful yet irritating gift, as I’m sure many of you know).

    It’s going to be weird without Dr. Dad, the retired psychiatrist who is often right by the phone ready to answer any personal or professional questions I may have.

  • Thank you. For the record, I am not a very private person. It’s so interesting to me that people have described my father as a “deeply private person.” Mom and I spoke about this idea earlier today. Neither of us feel that is accurate. Dad did not want to be special. He did not feel all that comfortable with the spotlight being on him, but I have posted many public photos of Dad and mentioned him many times long ago when I was blogging. He never minded. He was just interested in what he was interested in. He didn’t post photos of himself because he wasn’t interested in photos of himself. He was interested in holding psychiatry accountable.

  • A few corrections. The original blog was called Three Old Men. And dad was writing a lot about politics and medicine, and so I joked that it should be called 1 Boring Old Man. Then, as a joke, I bought the 1boringoldman URL for him for Christmas, since Al and Andy hadn’t been posting much.

    One more: We moved back to the US in 1974. That’s when he started studying Psychiatry officially. In the 60s, Dad was still in internal medicine in Memphis.

  • I’ve always been clear about the fact that my Dad was an unassuming, brilliant, deeply insightful, and profoundly helpful man. There have always been jokes around our house. I called him Rescue Boy and made jokes about him getting his cape. He told us about what he was doing with the blog, and when we visited him or when he visited us, he’d disappear for a while to his back room or my front porch. Later, my feed reader would let me know he’d written something else on the blog. We knew he was deeply engaged. We knew he thought it was cool to hang out with whistle blowers. I knew that the times he would call me repeatedly were only when the blog was down (I was the admin). For my whole life, Dad was always the tech guy, but there came a time when I passed him. I was a better user. He was a creator, building his first computer board with a little light using a soldering iron and a little pack of transistors and other tiny parts back in the 70s. In the 80s, he learned several different programming languages and ended up building the software he needed to run his private practice: billing, scheduling, etc. We knew he was up to big things, but I don’t think I realized how big until that BJM article came out and suddenly, Dad and his “blog friends” were in all the news outlets I read. I love what you wrote here, not because it was complimentary of my father. I’m used to that. I like that it distills what the hell hes been up to for the last 10-15 years. At first, I read Dad’s blog, but this isn’t content for the mildly interested! I’m not an MD. I’m a PhD, and a lot of this was so deep in the details that I was often bored (Dad would laugh. “Have you taken your Concerta, Abby?”). But he didn’t mind at all that we didn’t read all of this. As a serial hobbyist, this mission captured his interest more than anything I’ve ever seen him master. And I was so grateful. He’s a hyperdocuser, and what better way to spend one’s retirement than to became deeply involved in such an important cause: Holding Psychiatry to a higher ethical standard. Thanks for helping me understand what he was up to in the back room. Dad’s health had been declining for a long time. I know that didn’t show up on his blog. He even hid much of it from me. I knew more because Mom was honest with me. In the last year, I knew things had gotten bad. This month has been a rollercoaster, and I’m actually relieved that he is at peace. But I know he had so much more to say. All of you will help make sure that what he added to the field will not be lost just because he is gone. <3