Thursday, October 28, 2021

Comments by Godlovesme

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  • This is my first time posting but i would like to say i wish i could hear more positive experiences in these forums. It is very true that all you read about on the internet is horror stories. No one is going to post a success story, they just keep going on with their now fixed life. Why take the time to say you feel great. When you feel bad like we psych people do, then you look for help, support, answers, etc. I would like to say that without the “cocktail” of meds im on i would have surely committed suicide. I am 100% sure of it. I have battled anxiety my whole life and i hit a wall at 30 years old. I am not proud of the list of meds i have to take but i am also not ashamed…2×0.5mg Klonopin(anxiety), 150mg Lamictal(Mood and severe muscle spasms uncontrollable to until painful, 200mg Seroquel (sleep), 2x50mg tramadol (pain from back/neck injury, and what my doc calls fibro which i don’t believe in…i think i have some sort of autoimmune or virus that ravaged me at one time and lef lasting effects), 75ug synthroid (hypothyoroidis). I plan to remove each of these one at a time over the coming years but as of now these meds saved my F’n life. I was down to 2 hrs of sleep a night for years. The family genetic paranoia crept in and the “flight or fight” response became a 24/7 curse. Now going on 3 years taking these meds and going to therapies both mental and physical. I feel the change coming over me. The anxiety/irratibility/mood swings/paranoia/etc. have come down by at least 80% and i have hope that i will be able to come down off the drugs. I self medicated with everything you could think of for years and am now 100% sober. Anything i take is prescribed to me. I guess i wanted to put a success story in the making out for people to read and have hope. Im half way there. I am truly sorry for those of you that are alone and don’t have a family/friends to support you. It makes a HUGE difference. I would offer my time to you if you lived near by me. I am learning to love myself, love others, have faith in God/me/Good, i am taking martial arts now, boxing, playing soccer, and finally accepting my success in the workforce. You live half a life without self esteem. I finally have some and it feels F’n great. I will leave you with this. YES, meds are bad for your body BUT if you need a CRUTCH to heal just as if you broke a bone then why not use it. With a CRUTCH you can learn to be your own resource and not depend on it. But without that CRUTCH you run the risk of never feeling what we will call Normal/Peace/Love/Calm. My opinion is use the CRUTCH, learn to live without it over time, then take the CRUTCH away slowly and with ease and support of others. If i can help you i will. Just shoot me an email or reply. MUCH LOVE AND PEACE TO YOU ALL. Signed, Godlovesme..