Monday, December 5, 2022

Comments by C P

Showing 5 of 5 comments.

  • Wow, I’ve never thought of that. Good point! I think I assumed that if/because I’m so mentally broken, that I am not able nor allowed to be amongst society without help, and that it’s the dr’s/therapists/police’s jobs to keep sick people either out or closely watch them. That even if you are hopeless, you are not allowed to die, but they can’t let you amongst society unwatched, as the public would be upset. So they are forced to keep you in line, but they know you are hopeless but have to monitor. And that’s also why I thought, in part, that the attitudes towards hopeless cases like me was one of anger, resentment, disgust: they are duty-bound to keep you as “well” as possible yet mad cuz they know you are hopeless, waste of time, just gonna die like this anywY. But jump on a moral high horse if anyone mentions euthanasia. It is bonkers when I think of it. They are resentmentful that you are there and untreatable but they are forced to do whatever they think to make sure you don’t die nor bother/upset the public, yet in their minds they know it won’t help. Babysitting with pills and psycho babble and probably some secretly hoping you die naturally to rid the world of having to waste time, money, food, meds etc.

    Or they just like taking anyone’s money and it’s as simple as that.

    I really think many working in psychiatry and therapy literally hate most the clients. That it’s their job to society to keep us in a small niche, usually medicated. It’s been my experience that a huge chunk of us patients are living in a bubble of meds, therapy, groups etc where most psych patients are only around or kinda interact with other psych patients and drs/staff. And the public mostly avoids us, so our whole world, mentality is based on that, and “normal” people don’t want anything to do with it. And the public loves pushing you back in that bubble. Normal upset? First response is find meds, your dr, therapist, A psych group, etc. If I am not talking to a therapist or similar, I am isolated. And who wants to make new friends with the girl the whole town knows is crazy. Let the Drs deal with it. Happens to others, I’ve seen it. I’ve gone back in the system purely cuz I have nobody hardly to even just talk to., they don’t want to, or I get people warning people to stay away, which is how I lost a brand new friend, she said people told her I was hopeless, crazy, beyond help. I’ve gone months, A year, by myself, and end up running back to system out of sheer desperation. Had a therapist who would talk to me about movies, books, etc, cuz I just need to talk, much less any issues. Most my social life in life has been vague pseudo friends while in group, but not after, and therapists etc. And I’m shy anyway. I got very depressed in past thinking that. Pseudo friend of a therapist. Then they dump you, or move, or you do. Bam, no friends. Only human I talked to for long while was a therapist. Angway, I digress. I think the system sets ppl up to have to depend on it for literally all your needs–medical, mental, social. I had a worker once whose job purely was to do stuff with me–walks, cards, etc. But it’ll never be a true friendship (we are exempt from friendship/relationships, we are the unwanted specimens after all). I believe this is a core problem with psychology. But the public doesn’t want us, they want Drs to fix us or deal with us, so I’m sure the Drs don’t know what to do.

    You can manage symptoms but you’ll always be a very bad case and that’s all you should expect but not whine about it. Was my understanding.

    The public expects the Drs and pills to fix you or keep you out of society either physically or socially.

    However, I feel if they declare you hopeless and are resentful, they should offer euthanasia. But they need to be on moral high ground, so as to sleep at night, or feed ego.

    Which brings me to the point that we are society’s scapegoat– those damn hopeless crazies, causing stress and problems for us and everyone, I’m so overwhelmed having to deal with them and they are ruining society.

    However, I do wish they had therapy robots or something one could buy to be your friend, cuz many of us are just lonely I feel. Very isolated for much of life. The system benefits off our pain and loneliness though, that’s for sure.

  • Great news that more professional people, in many different areas, are starting to speak out against psychiatry. Awesome! Fact is, I doubt us current or former psych patients will ever be believed. The media, drug companies psychiatrists, etc have brainwashed the public, gps, police, teachers, clergy, friends, family, everyone.

    I began questioning medications slowly. Found out that questions are not allowed. Told I was in denial and overthinking, all part of my illnesses. Mind you, I was told this by lay people and professionals alike. Refusing to get well. I’ve had many regular people find out I am “severely mentally ill”, and if they know I don’t take meds anymore, I am further shunned. So I stay myself where I live. Only out for groceries. This was even way before covid!!

    Any time I have a legit, normal human problem. Nope, go get some meds. Any physical illness, nope, be quiet about it and if you’re upset, take some meds.

    I’ve had people stuck in the psych system who get VERY offended themselves about the fact that I myself don’t take meds. They get legit mad, even though it has no bearing on thrm. Probably jealous they are on 10 different meds, also tons of health problems they didn’t have before. Thing is, I was on and off meds for over 20years. I know what I’m talking about.

    I told a staff once. So, are just supposed to spend life taking tons of meds, sick, still mentally unwell, shuffled to tons of drs, whole life going to Drs and appointments etc. I was considered rude for asking. And told that since I have mental illness that is my responsibility in society, to take care of it, which to them means: be quiet, take pills, ignore your body and mind, be grateful, and remember that if you had diabetes you’d take insulin.

    Do you know how many regular people have bleated that fixed trope of: if you had insulin….

    So, if you do not take tons of meds, go to endless appointments, you aren’t being responsible. I’ve been threatened in the past with being locked up for life because I must follow Dr orders.

    I was taken to a psych hospital very upset crying. Depressed cuz all I did in the group home was sit, watch tv, and had something upsetting happen. The Drs bleated on about helping etc, but that meant more meds. This new med. I said do I have to take it? At first they said no. I was gonna discharge. Was told the day of that since I won’t take the med, I am not allowed to keave. I cried and cried. Took the med just to get out. Eventually got out of other help house. Stopped that med. Coercive control.

    I have so many bad experiences with psychiatry and mental health system. A few good experiences with a few therapists. Constantly passed around as they don’t have expertise in trauma. Therapists by and large don’t know much. In cahoots with psychiatry. Go Drs too.

    I no longer go to Drs for even physical problems unless super severe. Even then its not often a good experience. No matter the reason I’m there, its always cuz I’m crazy. I also get fearful that any Dr at any time can say you are crazy and lock you up. If you are blocked up, you end up having to pretend that just cuz you sat doing nothing but maybe a fee cooing skills classes, and took a few pills, that you are mostly better and super happy now. If you dont, you will be put on more meds or not allowed to leave. If you say something isn’t helping, it’s always your fault and they are MAD at YOU for it.

    Seems mental illness will be society’s next scapegoat, if it isn’t already.

    Public mostly considers Drs gods.

    There was a patient sick in a psych ward once. They were told that you have to wait to deal with physical problems unless its fatal til you are out, this is a PSYCH ward. I’ve had Drs tell me that food does not affect your mood or body. I complained that we all are supposed to eat 3 meals and maybe a snack,just sit here doing nothing, takingnmeds, and most gain weight. I ssid, I don’t need that much food to sit and do nothing, it makes no sense. Nope, eating disorder behavior. Tho I had a staff told me she agreed, so I was allowed to not eat all the food. This wasn’t even an eating disorder hospitsl. Oh god, dont get me started on those either. Abysmal. Yet the patients are deemed incurable. No one will ever blame drs, they are god remember.

    I have just met A professional and they will say in a very irritated voice, you have too many boring MS I don’t know where to start with you. I have had professionals say the hat people like me never get better, so expect to be like thus and on meds and hospitals for life. Yet you are worthless, hopeless, yet can’t die. Nooe, can’t die cuz then THEY would feel bad. So we are meant to subsist as prisoners of psychiatry and Ford d to be alive in this hell, all so the Drs and public can sleep at night, safe that they are “helping” those worthless people and safe and smug that they are not mentally ill.

    Psychiatry created us worthless ones. I was z13, put on meds against my will. Told was born broken. I any many meds later. And drs. No career, no relationships. Shunned. On disability. Had the trauma and abuse that happened nd and going on been dealt with, I could v been a regular member of society. Is impossible now cuz everyone will always believe you are ill. The public does NOT want to help LP mentallybill. If hey dont want them in work, family, or for nds. They are resentful that the media tries to destigmatize illness. They don’t WANT to interact with or know you. Even if you are “cured”, you never will be. I believe he I was a normal girl reacting sanely to bad circumstances. But, I was a submissive kid, and believed I was born broken. Stil do actually. Tho psychiatry made me that way. Nobody believes s that, if you say it, it is your illness blaming others.

    So, yes, please, recruit ” normal” professionals to tear this devil of psychiatry down.

    I know many people in their teens 20s 30s who their life, like mine was and is, is either going to endless appointments, or if nit, shunned and sitting home all day like lock down. Most of us are on permanent disability. Paid to be on my d’s and keep quiet. Paid to keep quiet. Shoved out of the workforce. Many like me never having a relationship, and in fact I’ve usually been shipped encouraged to NOT seek friendshios or relationships, as people can’t handle mental illness. Gone years s talking to nobody but a therapist as a “friend”. Was told the only n people who would love would be those trying to hurt me. Grsnted, they were right, only abusers want anything to do with me. So I have up wanting friends or s relationships, either they want to hurt me, or I’m so much seed up I will upset them, which is a fear made 100x worse by Drs and therapists telling me to his. If hen that hey act like you have no right to be lonely, you are mentally ill.

    Really, I just pray for a quick heart attack. Life looks bleak. Is no return or way out. I’ve accepted it. Just very sad and hesrtboken. I can’t even get proper help or talking cuz it all ends n up being about labels and must get meds and half don’t want to hear your life. I had numerous times just needed to talk. If old if I’m not taking I d’s for life I am refusing to be well, and then you are further shunned cuz you are crazy but not fixing it. And by fixing it hey mean take meds and never cry, be sad, lonely, upset etc.

    Thanks to those with the power and social clout for speaking out. We haven’t been rendered voiceless.

  • The labeling of behaviors/reactions as “attention seeking” is VERY Prime problematic. It silence s you. Confuses you. Makes you feel bad.

    I’ve gotten this from drs, nurses, friends, anyone. I have legitly had a very hard time, self harmed in some way, or was crying upset, only to ALWAYS be told: you’re attention seeking. Knock it off. You are having mental illness by attention seeking. You wont get attention.

    So what happens is, you are shamed and silenced for reacting to severe mental anguish. That anguish is dismissed, mocked, and you have to be silent about what is wrong cuz : nothing is wrong with you but the fact you are attention seeking cuz you are ill. 🙁

    I’ve gone to Drs and crisis saying I’m struggling. Tri new saying I’m struggling. No you’re not you’re fine quit attention seeking I’m told. If I do selfnharm, off to hospital for a week, more my ds, come back and you better be good. Struggle is relapse they say.

    The worst thing a mentally ill person can want is attention, apparently. Jesus wept!

    Thus,no gave up trying to solve struggles. Why would I try? Its attention seeking to struggle. Take pills and shut up and kiss the doctor-gods’ feet.

    I know many who equate Drs withbgids. Do not question. Ever. Its a sin to ever question a Dr and questioning Drs is an illness. Bow to your lord. Even if it kills you.

    Yet if you talk about this, it is attention seeking and blaming others for your illness. Never ever say that your problems started from childhood, you will be labelled as blaming and not accepting your illness.

    I know many ppl with like 10 different mental health diagnoses!! thing is they believe it. They sit and talk of all their disorders. Our lives are nothing but meds, appointments, drs, nurses, grouos, hospitals, illness, pain. Forever.

    Dbt makes you silent. Radical acceptance. All that. Just be grateful. You are the problem end of discussion. You are in debt cuz you are deemed worthless by society. It pretends to fix trauma. In does not. Another snake oil. If you do not want to forgive abuse, you are ill. I could go on and on.

    Boycott mental health industry. Hit em in their wallets, lord knows they don’t really care bout ppl.

  • I’d like to reiterate that I believe many people conveniently use psychiatry’s medical disease religion/model as a way to shut up people who have been abused/harmed. Consciously or not. The drs themselves, sure, but also the public.

    For example, members of my family, and other adults, latched onto the “her brain was born broken” idea from the get-go. Nothing questioned as to why all of a sudden this child is having problems. Can’t be circumstance, abuse, adult failings, society failings. Nope. Brain broken. End of.

    For over 20years I was told my brain was broken. I still am only just seeing this isn’t true. Even to this day family, community, anyone reminds me that i have a chemical imbalance so there is no reason for my problems, it’s just me. Take pills. Shut up.

    Family member: you known you have a chemical imbalance, in your genetics, deal with it.

    Society does this too. And many people want mentally locked up. No joke. Have heard many people complain in general about how, yeah, well it’s not their fault born with broken brains but we dont have to put up with it nor should we, lock them up.

    So they tried to destigmatize mental illness, saying it’s nit your fault but faulty brain. All that did was make us hopeless and worthless to society. To be tolerated, ignored, hopefully locked up. Out of sight. Believe me, this is what the public wants. Scary.

    I am effectively paid by the government to keep silent and out of the way, and medicated. If I don’t, I will be locked up, forced. Can never be hired anywhere. Lost too much time, will never have a career. No money. Either stay in your apartment, make no fuss, have or show no sadness or fear, don’t feel lonely, ignore your body since gp docs will never believe you if your body is ok (apparently people with mental illness never have physical problems). Wait to die.

    They dont WANT you to get well, get a career, a family. Just take meds and remember you r broken for life. Not your fault, but it’s no one elses either. Wow!

    Adding to that is the fact that they bore us to death. Sit in a hospital with barely anything to do. Take meds. Go home. I was in a place where all we did was sit, maybe watch tv or a board game. Everyone complained of being bored. Staff were verbally irritated and always said, we r sick of hearing you are bored. Just sit, take pills, decline to death. Yep, those hopeless crazies. In a different hospital we were not allowed to sleep except at night. Rooms locked during day. Nothing but 1 tv a few games. Very medicated, hence drowsy. Staff would bark at you, no sleeping if you nodded off. I spent all day forcing self to stay awake praying for bed time.

    Mental staff have huge disdain for us.

    Years of youth sitting. Doing nothing. Maybe learning about coping skills you’ve heard 100x and to sleep 8hours. And yet the public calls US useless. We aren’t allowed to do anything else. Eventually you are out of work force society so long it’s very hard to get back. Most ppl I know are teens, 20s, 30s, on lifelong /term disability for mental illness. Any problem in life is solved by pills or sticking you in hospital for a week.

    I would cry and was having a hard time in life. Was put in hospita at least 1x a month for a few days or more.

    I’d cry I was lonely. No friends. Suggested I talk a therapist or call a crisis number just to chat. Suggested I check myself in psych ward cuz then I’d have people to talk to. I actually did 2x, so lonely. Found out staff in psych wards aren’t there to talk to you. They are busy! Patients…well hit or miss, depend who is there.

    Public cries cuz too many crazy ppl, want drs to fix it. Society does not want to hear our struggles, listen, or care. Only demonize and gloat and bleat on and on about crazy ppl just need to take their meds or get new ones if on some.

    People want to make selves feel safe,in that if you have a mental illness, then they don’t, and they are safe knowing they aren’t crazy like you. It’s THOSE crazy people, I’m fine.

    If you think public is on our side. Lol, nope. It’s hopeless. Tho I hope not.

    I’ve heard guys say they only get with girls with mental illness cuz they are broken and have no boundaries and so they can do anything to them.

    Had someone tell me that he could hurt me anytime he liked and if I cried I would be locked in the loony bin and if I hurt myself i would be locked up, but he could hurt me.

    I was robbed of a normal youth. Instead of friends, hobbies, etc, I had appointments, hospitals, worries about how I was broken meds to suffer with. I did not socially develop right cuz I was in the psych system. As a kid. And after.

    I had a Dr ask how in was in school. I said I isolated and had own problems but academically got straight As. Was accused of lying cuz ppl like me well in school. It’s shit like this.

    Never dated. Told not to. Now older shunned cuz, well must be something wrong with her if no one’s ever wanted her but to hurt her. People in town telling everyone, oh that’s that crazy girl, steer clear.

    Told ppl with mental illness cannot have relationships or friendships that are health. So quit crying about being lonely. Be grateful l. And don’t expect to put your problems on ppl. I believe it tho still. Expect to be alone til I die. Been alone most life. It is lonely sitting in hospital or at home taking pills.

    Well, I say all us “crazy” people should shun society. Refuse to help it, engage, etc. Eventually there will be so many of us that society has no workers. We are too crazy remember?!!! Let the government pay us to go away and be silent. Eff em then. Take pills, be sick watch tv. That’s what they wanted!!! We should help them have it backfire. We will be the useless baggage that brings society down, then they will have to deal with it. Yep, can’t help in society, sorry, crazy remember, that’s what you said. Nothing else we can do. Our deaths might matter maybe prob not. Seriously, this system made me a useless member. I only just realized all this past cpl years. 25years in system. Still am. Hoping vivid, heart attack etc kills me asap. I have zero faith in society just as bad as psychiatry. The public WANTS you crazy, so villify you. What can we do? Nothing. But I don’t belong and tbh eff society anyway.

    Sad thing is, I will be marked for life. Wish they’d just shoot us quick, would be more humane. God please save us, the humans are enemies to your soul!!

  • Wonderful article. I, too, have had my life hijacked by psychiatry and the mental “health” system. I will never have a life and lately I’m so heartbroken but alone in it.

    I have trauma and abuse, as a baby and toddler, and child. I did not understand what was wrong. I feel psychiatry was used to silence me and blame me. Mind you, at the time I believed the drs and adults that my brain was broken, etc. I still have never healed from the original problems, much less psychiatry.

    I was 13. Language’s lies became my identity. I hated self even more. And everyone else then and now did/does too. I ruined the family cuz mental illness shame. Have zero peers cuz I’m the ill one. Been in and out of many psych wards. Many meds.

    I had horrific experiences in hospitals. Nobody believes me. Family, others, just still say, well you need to take meds. The public HATES us crazies. Shunned. Bullies telling people stay away from her she has mental problems. I avoid doctors at all costs but when I’ve been super sick even drs are atrocious. A dentist sent me to Dr for infected tooth, Dr came out told me to go home it’s just anxiety. Staff making fun of me. I have hundreds of examples. I’d rather get sick and die than go to any Dr.

    Had a psychiatrist tell me in my 20s that I will have a hard life cuz I’m not that smart or pretty but I listen and do what told fairly well so that’s good at least. I believed him. Told by psych staff oh everyone knows you can’t get well, first time meeting them. Told my severe eating disorder is vanity. It wasn’t !

    I could on and on. Family loved the medical model I think in hindsight. Nothing to see here it’s HER, she was BORN with crazy broken brain. Take your pills. Shut up. Therapy is nonprofit, just take your pills to fix your brain.

    Most therapists aren’t good either. They believe psychiatrists are god.

    My whole life has been in hospitals in and out, therapy (which only ever had a couple in my 40years even mention that my problems aren’t all me, that I had severe severe childhood trauma and abuse. Yet it does not matter. The system is captured by the devil.

    I was blamed for going through med withdrawal when it was drs who kept switching me. If I was crying r sad cuz all I did was sit in a hospital, bored, drugged, or if out sit alone except once a week for therapy that was not helpful….I was forced back in a hospital forced on meds. Told I could not leave unless took them. I’ve been taken by police for crying because of being unsafe. Medicated. Sent back to same situation. Message was be quiet. You deserve it.

    I have zero hope. Public r pieces of shut, sorry. People have told me nobody wants anything to do with me and keep problems self and nobody likes mentally ill ppl so take your meds and be good.

    I am disabled cuz all this. Paid by government to be silent. I sit alone all day. Not suicidal but pray every day I drop dead.

    No dating experience. Very little job experiences. It’s too late now. 40yrs old. So lonely. Nobody would or will ever love me. I gave up on it cpl years ago. Branded crazy so I don’t even try to date. If try and have friend if I’m not 100percent happy at all times I’m told to take meds. If I have a normal problem like ppl I’m told to find a therapist.

    The public does not and will not let u back in. I am meant to only have therapists as “friends”.

    Been told nobody wants to hear about my life, it’s too upsetting for ppl. Keep quiet. Feel my self and life is a burden to everyone an society.

    People are mad I don’t take meds. Literally angered. I am better not on the meds. It’s only been a few years. I am shunned for not taking tons meds, even tho they never helped. That was my fault too. I did all they said. No, they say, you didn’t do it right, or you just need the right med.

    My whole life has been sitting n assessments hospitals, appointments groups medications appointment etc.

    The medical model lie is a dream come true for abusers. Trust me.

    I was told by medical staff that nobody woukd love me, that cuz of my illnesses anyone who would want to live me would be using me. Same with friends. I attract mean people cuz my trauma yet I still believe it’s my fault. I do believe the only ppl who would ever want anything to do with me would be to hurt me. So when I had a very mean friend, that I let go of the staff blamed me cuz mentally can’t pick friends or dates. Result is I even further do not trust ppl. And the only people who DO want anything to do with me often have ill intent.

    I was told in an eating disorder hospital that most never get better cuz we are difficult.

    I had a nurse tell me that if she could let suicidal patients die she would cuz some people have real problems. I was a young teen. I had drs where all they ever did was listen for ten mins and up my prescription if I wasn’t all sunshine.

    Fact that I’m old and still crazy is my fault, according to the world.

    It doesn’t matter the truth. Psychiatry’s lies will always in in the public’s mind. YOU are crazy, NOT them. So they think.

    Nobody will ever believe me, my story. I gave up col year ago even trying. Just staying my apt waiting to die. Literally. Kill time. I am not wanted in society. I hate self. However for fact I was harmed deeply by psychiatric system. I am a nothing, so it doesn’t matter. I gave up on self and life cuz hard truth is that the public will never believe me, will never believe the Drs were wrong.

    I know of many young ppl that there whole life so far is hospitals, pills, appointments, sickness from pills, more pills, groups. That’s it. Ppl in teens and 20s 30s. Just like me. Most believe in the system. I got out. Kinda. Am a living dead girl. It’s too late for me. Hopefully in the future ppl won’t have this. I was robbed. Oh well. Doesn’t matter I just hope to die fast. Nothing on this hell planet or from hell humans I want anymore. Just stay the fuck away from me all humans or kill me asap. It’s how I fell now. Sorry. So lonely. Hurt. Was lied to. Only been past few years see thru the BS of “health” care.

    But if you disagree with psychiatry most ppl say you are crazy and its part of an illness.

    Have been at urgent care for body issues, came out with even more psych labels, after 10mins.

    Put in room naked, with cameras, for safety supposedly.

    Given meds and when I asked told they dont have to tell me a I’m patient.

    I was put on psych meds at 12/13 (!!!) for depression. Crying. Isolating. Quiet. Straight As but depressed. Family member took me to Dr. Dr said I needed meds. I got way worse after the antidepressants. Hurt myself. Had to go to court cuz hurting self is against the law. Shunned at school cuz crazy. Had zero social life from age of 11 til current (almost 40). On and off meds. Drs upping meds if I was still sad. I’m allost 40 and so to spare you a long and boring story, I was very harmed by the system. I will never recover. Oh well but I am deeply sad. I tried talking to a few ppl about this. Never again. Was told I’m making excuses for my mental illness and mistakes and that all crazy ppl lie. Yep, I will never be believed. Worse than the original trauma almost that’s what psychiatry is. I pray every day for heart attack. Kill time with Netflix. No therapist will work with me. No friends. If I cry the neighbors call police and I know shut up no crying else the police take me to hospital and I’m Locked up medicated for at least 3 days, then go home and keel pain to self better. Is an attitude of, just waiting for her to die. Mental patients r looked at as a nuisance. Wish they had euthansia as it would be more humans. But no you can’t die, just be torturd by humans. Psychirtry has lead me to fear and despite sanity, including self.

    In was 13 years old. Told I was broken, born broken, for life.

    Many people are silenclng trauma with psychogogical vs

    Sorry if I offended anyone.

    I am beyond repair and half is my fault. But YES the system is abusive, and wrong, and I hope they all go to hell.

    I hate earth, humans, and life. I am in fear and heartache all the time, because of the American medical mafia. Humans r the most shit species hope god floods you all again then. I do not identify as human cuz humans r the devil, they invented psychiatry ffs. Can’t wait til I’m free of this shit body, mind, heart, species, society, planet. Dreams died. To the humans I am a lost cause mentaly ill worthless thing.

    Thanks to those trying to fix this system. Many of us r very damaged from it but will never be believed. I have no hope so glad you do. Great, important article. Sorry for all the words and offense.