You’re so welcome and I really hope it proves helpful! Methylation can definitely feel like a deep rabbit hole at first, but even small steps can make a big difference. I actually wrote a simple intro blog about it that doesnât get too far into the weeds (there are over a dozen types of methylation ), but it might give you a good starting point as you explore: https://www.jordansartfulwellness.com/post/understanding-methylation-my-journey-and-why-it-matters
Feel free to reach out if you ever want to chat more about it. Itâs been such a key piece in my own healing.
Thank you for sharing your journey. Iâm really glad you found a path that worked for you and brought relief. I totally understand the instinct to be cautious; if I had trusted mine more, I might have avoided what happened to me with TMS. I think your story shows how personal and diverse healing can be and how sometimes, itâs the systems we donât go through that end up sparing us harm.
My piece was really about speaking up for those of us who did seek help through psychiatry and got hurt in ways that were deeply preventable. I wish that kind of harm wasnât even possible in a system meant to heal. Your comment reminds me how important it is to trust our own sense of whatâs safe and right and why we need to keep shining light on practices that carry risk, especially when people are vulnerable and just trying to get better.
I hear you so much! The urge for justice is strong, especially when the harm is so real and lasting. Itâs a complicated road, but speaking out and connecting with others who get it has been a powerful first step. Thank you for reading my story and speaking out!
Thank you so much, Heather. I really appreciate your kind words and support. It means a lot to know others are questioning and researching before committing to TMS, especially with symptoms like migraines and fatigue that could be worsened. Itâs heartbreaking how often concerns get dismissed or downplayed, and thatâs exactly why I felt compelled to share my experience to help others avoid harm and to push for better awareness and safety. It means the world that my story made an impact on you to keep questioning and putting your health first. Wishing you strength and healing on your journey as well.
If you ever want to connect or learn more resources, feel free to reach out. Weâre in this together.
P.S – If you do not mind, I did have a thought about your migraines and fatigue and wondered if you looked into methlyation?? Iâm not a doctor, but learning about methylation really helped me understand some of my symptoms related to fatigue (before TMS). Methylation is a natural process in your body that affects how your genes work and helps with things like energy, detox, and brain health. For me now, it is now even more important to my current healing for my brain recovery.
There are 12 common markers that show how well this process is working, and I found out I had issues with about 10 of them. After making some changes like adjusting my diet and supplements, I noticed improvements. It might be worth exploring??
Thank you, Daniel. That really means a lot. Itâs been an incredibly painfully tough road, but hearing that sharing my story might help someone else makes it feel totally worth it. I really appreciate you taking the time to read and say something. Truly. Thank you!
Hey Sam, I’m so incredibly sorry you’re going through this. I canât imagine how devastating it must be to have gone through 27 full sessions and be left with such severe, lasting symptoms. What you described about the memory loss, the word-finding issues, not being able to ride your bike, the intense ringing, and feeling reclusive, itâs heartbreaking.
Thank you for sharing your story and for being so brave and open. I know how hard it is to speak up when youâre in pain and feel dismissed or forgotten. Your voice matters so, so much and it helps others feel less alone.
As my story shares, I only did three sessions out of a planned 56 and still ended up with a serious, debilitating injury. Itâs terrifying how quickly things can go wrong and how little help or acknowledgment there is when they do. It never gets easier to hear that the same has happened to others and again, I’m sorry it has happened to you.
The more we connect and share our stories, the more I truly believe weâll start to uncover ways to heal. We may not have all the answers yet, but together, we can move through this even if itâs slowly, even if itâs messy. You’re not alone in this. If I have any resources to share further, I will certainly do so. I’m sure you know about VTAG and I hope you found understanding there. I’ve created a resource booklet that is ever changing as I learn more, but you’re welcome to explore it. https://www.jordansartfulwellness.com/_files/ugd/d3ad28_087e9a0be61e4cdfb246d2669694c400.pdf?index=true
Hi Song,
Thank you so much your words really moved me. Itâs validating to be met with that kind of understanding, especially after so much gaslighting and dismissal. Youâre so right when physical symptoms follow a psychiatric treatment, theyâre too often written off as psychosomatic or somehow less real. And when a treatment is marketed as cutting-edge or âsafe,â any harm becomes almost untouchable, like weâre not allowed to question it without being labeled as unstable or ungrateful.
In my case, the psychiatrist even falsified my records claiming I was on Zoloft when I wasnât. We now believe she did that to get my treatment pushed through insurance faster, so I could be approved and put into the machine without delay. That kind of deception just to streamline a process is terrifying. It robbed me of informed consent and contributed directly to the harm I experienced.
I didnât want to become a cautionary tale, but I also couldnât stay silent when the harm was so real. Finding others who get it who truly see whatâs happening has helped me start to reclaim pieces of myself that were lost in the process.
Thank you for holding space, for naming the bigger issue, and for reminding me that this isnât just personal. It’s systemic. I hope we all keep raising our voices until dignity, honesty, and bodily autonomy are non-negotiable in care.
Sending warmth and deep respect All the best.
James, wow wow. I had to sit with this before responding. Your words are so deeply validating and painful and true, and I felt them all. Thank you for reflecting it all back. It means more than I can say.
You’re right. Thereâs just no end to how many layers of wrong there are with TMS and how itâs pushed, sold, and badministered. Reading your story, I had the exact same reaction. Moments where I went, wait, Iâve never even thought of that before, even though I live with the same injury. Thereâs something about hearing it from someone else that cuts deeper but connects to what, I think, we all experience. Like it gives permission to grieve what we couldnât fully name.
Iâm so sorry you went through what you did. The promotional video ask… I mean, what? Itâs like theyâre living in a different dimension. Itâs surreal and enraging.
The gaslighting is so calculated. Iâve seen those same reports in the MAUDE database too. They knew. They know. And theyâre still pushing it, still pretending. Itâs beyond negligence. Itâs a machine fueled by denial and profit and people who donât want to see the truth.
Also, I just want to say. I came across your posts and your blog on Mad in America right after my injury. I think it was just the right Google search at the right moment, and I honestly donât know what I wouldâve done if I hadnât found them. Your story helped me put words to what was happening, and it gave me the strength to keep looking for answers. I really hope that with more of us speaking out, it becomes even easier for others in crisis to find these stories and feel less alone.
Your words are a lifeline, James. Truly. I hope you know that your voice is helping hold up so many people, including me. None of us should be carrying this alone, and somehow, through the wreckage, weâre finding each other. That gives me hope.
Thank you for being here. Iâm grateful for you.
Thank you, Daniel. That really means a lot. Itâs been an incredibly painfully tough road, but hearing that sharing my story might help someone else makes it feel totally worth it. I really appreciate you taking the time to read and say something. Truly. Thank you!
Freya, thank you so much for your thoughtful words. It means a lot. You’re so right. We go in with trust, doing what we’re taught to do, and when things go wrong, itâs like the system flips on us. Instead of care, weâre met with denial, blame, or silence. Itâs devastating.
What you said about psychiatry and the pattern of disbelieving patients rings painfully true. The way people are experimented on, dismissed, and often left to pick up the pieces alone is a deep, systemic failure.
I really appreciate your compassion. Wishing you strength too, wherever you are on your own path. We need each other in this.
Thank you for your concern, Cathy. I truly wish I had never undergone TMS, but that’s part of what makes this so complicated and heartbreaking.
Like many others, I was told to expect minor side effects like headaches and that I might feel worse before I felt better. I reported the pain and symptoms right away like the extreme pressure in my head, vision issues, and confusion, but the staff reassured me it was ânormalâ and even suggested it meant the treatment was âworking.â I trusted the clinic. I was also misled to believe the psychiatrist was monitoring my sessions, when in fact she was out of town and unaware I was being treated.
By the time I realized something was seriously wrong, the damage had already been done. And once your brain is injured, itâs not like breaking a leg because you donât always recognize how impaired you are until much later. I stopped after three sessions, but I still live every day with the consequences.
This is why I speak out now: because many people who are harmed are dismissed or blamed, when in reality, they werenât given true informed consent or safety protocols. I hope my story helps prevent this from happening to others.
Thank you, James!
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You’re so welcome and I really hope it proves helpful! Methylation can definitely feel like a deep rabbit hole at first, but even small steps can make a big difference. I actually wrote a simple intro blog about it that doesnât get too far into the weeds (there are over a dozen types of methylation ), but it might give you a good starting point as you explore: https://www.jordansartfulwellness.com/post/understanding-methylation-my-journey-and-why-it-matters
Feel free to reach out if you ever want to chat more about it. Itâs been such a key piece in my own healing.
Report comment
Thank you for sharing your journey. Iâm really glad you found a path that worked for you and brought relief. I totally understand the instinct to be cautious; if I had trusted mine more, I might have avoided what happened to me with TMS. I think your story shows how personal and diverse healing can be and how sometimes, itâs the systems we donât go through that end up sparing us harm.
My piece was really about speaking up for those of us who did seek help through psychiatry and got hurt in ways that were deeply preventable. I wish that kind of harm wasnât even possible in a system meant to heal. Your comment reminds me how important it is to trust our own sense of whatâs safe and right and why we need to keep shining light on practices that carry risk, especially when people are vulnerable and just trying to get better.
Report comment
I hear you so much! The urge for justice is strong, especially when the harm is so real and lasting. Itâs a complicated road, but speaking out and connecting with others who get it has been a powerful first step. Thank you for reading my story and speaking out!
Report comment
Thank you so much, Heather. I really appreciate your kind words and support. It means a lot to know others are questioning and researching before committing to TMS, especially with symptoms like migraines and fatigue that could be worsened. Itâs heartbreaking how often concerns get dismissed or downplayed, and thatâs exactly why I felt compelled to share my experience to help others avoid harm and to push for better awareness and safety. It means the world that my story made an impact on you to keep questioning and putting your health first. Wishing you strength and healing on your journey as well.
If you ever want to connect or learn more resources, feel free to reach out. Weâre in this together.
P.S – If you do not mind, I did have a thought about your migraines and fatigue and wondered if you looked into methlyation?? Iâm not a doctor, but learning about methylation really helped me understand some of my symptoms related to fatigue (before TMS). Methylation is a natural process in your body that affects how your genes work and helps with things like energy, detox, and brain health. For me now, it is now even more important to my current healing for my brain recovery.
There are 12 common markers that show how well this process is working, and I found out I had issues with about 10 of them. After making some changes like adjusting my diet and supplements, I noticed improvements. It might be worth exploring??
Report comment
Thank you, Daniel. That really means a lot. Itâs been an incredibly painfully tough road, but hearing that sharing my story might help someone else makes it feel totally worth it. I really appreciate you taking the time to read and say something. Truly. Thank you!
Report comment
Hey Sam, I’m so incredibly sorry you’re going through this. I canât imagine how devastating it must be to have gone through 27 full sessions and be left with such severe, lasting symptoms. What you described about the memory loss, the word-finding issues, not being able to ride your bike, the intense ringing, and feeling reclusive, itâs heartbreaking.
Thank you for sharing your story and for being so brave and open. I know how hard it is to speak up when youâre in pain and feel dismissed or forgotten. Your voice matters so, so much and it helps others feel less alone.
As my story shares, I only did three sessions out of a planned 56 and still ended up with a serious, debilitating injury. Itâs terrifying how quickly things can go wrong and how little help or acknowledgment there is when they do. It never gets easier to hear that the same has happened to others and again, I’m sorry it has happened to you.
And youâre absolutely right: TMS is not FDA approved, itâs FDA cleared through the 510(k) process, which doesnât require thorough long-term safety testing. It was pushed through under a loophole. The Center for Research on Women and Families has raised major concerns about this:
https://www.center4research.org/statement-national-research-center-women-families-fda-advisory-panel-meeting-regarding-neurostar-tms-system-major-depression/
Iâm just so sorry this happened to you. None of us deserved this and I hope you know that what you’re feeling and experiencing is valid.
The more we connect and share our stories, the more I truly believe weâll start to uncover ways to heal. We may not have all the answers yet, but together, we can move through this even if itâs slowly, even if itâs messy. You’re not alone in this. If I have any resources to share further, I will certainly do so. I’m sure you know about VTAG and I hope you found understanding there. I’ve created a resource booklet that is ever changing as I learn more, but you’re welcome to explore it.
https://www.jordansartfulwellness.com/_files/ugd/d3ad28_087e9a0be61e4cdfb246d2669694c400.pdf?index=true
Report comment
Hi Song,
Thank you so much your words really moved me. Itâs validating to be met with that kind of understanding, especially after so much gaslighting and dismissal. Youâre so right when physical symptoms follow a psychiatric treatment, theyâre too often written off as psychosomatic or somehow less real. And when a treatment is marketed as cutting-edge or âsafe,â any harm becomes almost untouchable, like weâre not allowed to question it without being labeled as unstable or ungrateful.
In my case, the psychiatrist even falsified my records claiming I was on Zoloft when I wasnât. We now believe she did that to get my treatment pushed through insurance faster, so I could be approved and put into the machine without delay. That kind of deception just to streamline a process is terrifying. It robbed me of informed consent and contributed directly to the harm I experienced.
I didnât want to become a cautionary tale, but I also couldnât stay silent when the harm was so real. Finding others who get it who truly see whatâs happening has helped me start to reclaim pieces of myself that were lost in the process.
Thank you for holding space, for naming the bigger issue, and for reminding me that this isnât just personal. It’s systemic. I hope we all keep raising our voices until dignity, honesty, and bodily autonomy are non-negotiable in care.
Sending warmth and deep respect All the best.
Report comment
James, wow wow. I had to sit with this before responding. Your words are so deeply validating and painful and true, and I felt them all. Thank you for reflecting it all back. It means more than I can say.
You’re right. Thereâs just no end to how many layers of wrong there are with TMS and how itâs pushed, sold, and badministered. Reading your story, I had the exact same reaction. Moments where I went, wait, Iâve never even thought of that before, even though I live with the same injury. Thereâs something about hearing it from someone else that cuts deeper but connects to what, I think, we all experience. Like it gives permission to grieve what we couldnât fully name.
Iâm so sorry you went through what you did. The promotional video ask… I mean, what? Itâs like theyâre living in a different dimension. Itâs surreal and enraging.
The gaslighting is so calculated. Iâve seen those same reports in the MAUDE database too. They knew. They know. And theyâre still pushing it, still pretending. Itâs beyond negligence. Itâs a machine fueled by denial and profit and people who donât want to see the truth.
Also, I just want to say. I came across your posts and your blog on Mad in America right after my injury. I think it was just the right Google search at the right moment, and I honestly donât know what I wouldâve done if I hadnât found them. Your story helped me put words to what was happening, and it gave me the strength to keep looking for answers. I really hope that with more of us speaking out, it becomes even easier for others in crisis to find these stories and feel less alone.
Your words are a lifeline, James. Truly. I hope you know that your voice is helping hold up so many people, including me. None of us should be carrying this alone, and somehow, through the wreckage, weâre finding each other. That gives me hope.
Thank you for being here. Iâm grateful for you.
Report comment
Thank you, Daniel. That really means a lot. Itâs been an incredibly painfully tough road, but hearing that sharing my story might help someone else makes it feel totally worth it. I really appreciate you taking the time to read and say something. Truly. Thank you!
Report comment
Freya, thank you so much for your thoughtful words. It means a lot. You’re so right. We go in with trust, doing what we’re taught to do, and when things go wrong, itâs like the system flips on us. Instead of care, weâre met with denial, blame, or silence. Itâs devastating.
What you said about psychiatry and the pattern of disbelieving patients rings painfully true. The way people are experimented on, dismissed, and often left to pick up the pieces alone is a deep, systemic failure.
I really appreciate your compassion. Wishing you strength too, wherever you are on your own path. We need each other in this.
Report comment
Thank you for your concern, Cathy. I truly wish I had never undergone TMS, but that’s part of what makes this so complicated and heartbreaking.
Like many others, I was told to expect minor side effects like headaches and that I might feel worse before I felt better. I reported the pain and symptoms right away like the extreme pressure in my head, vision issues, and confusion, but the staff reassured me it was ânormalâ and even suggested it meant the treatment was âworking.â I trusted the clinic. I was also misled to believe the psychiatrist was monitoring my sessions, when in fact she was out of town and unaware I was being treated.
By the time I realized something was seriously wrong, the damage had already been done. And once your brain is injured, itâs not like breaking a leg because you donât always recognize how impaired you are until much later. I stopped after three sessions, but I still live every day with the consequences.
This is why I speak out now: because many people who are harmed are dismissed or blamed, when in reality, they werenât given true informed consent or safety protocols. I hope my story helps prevent this from happening to others.
Report comment