I’m sorry that you had such a roller coaster of a ride. The way that psychs hand out medications like candy is just wrong and should be seen as disturbing. But, because they have degrees, no one thinks to question them. It’s so disturbing that this is seen as NORMAL. “Oh, you just need to find the right combination of medications. It may take a while, but you should keep taking them.” Like, what? In my own life, I’m honestly surprised that I didn’t have a horrible reaction to Paxil. That med seems to be the breaking point for so many people. Maybe it’s because I started taking 40mg when I was 6 and my brain kind of developed around it. That and 100mg of Trazadone (for sleep) were the first things I was prescribed. Now it’s 40mg Paxil, 200mg Anafranil, and 0.5-1mg Xanax. I was prescribed, but have never taken, 50mg Topamax, 10mg Zyprexa, and 2mg Risperdal. All to be taken together on top of the other three. I think towards the end they were just trying to kill me. I took one look at the side effects of the antipsychotics and said “No way in Hell.” I’m just glad I had that option. I have zero idea why the Paxil and Anafranil have not given me serotonin syndrome yet. Maybe I’m just naturally sturdy.