Monday, February 24, 2020

Comments by Rewritten

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  • Psychotherapy can be almost as damaging as bad drugs. Many of us ‘former patients’ have had terrible experiences with therapists. We have gone in, begging for help, baring our souls . . . and receive less than nothing in return. So many psychotherapists are in it just for power plays of their own. We have been screamed at, degraded, told we were ‘unloveable’, and have basically been blamed for causing whatever problems which caused us to seek out therapy in the first place. The damage this would cause a child in a psychotherapist’s office boggles my mind.
    The problem is that if you have a problem, our society has the knee-jerk reaction of saying: “Go get therapy”. This has to end. What has to start is a realization that too many psychotherapists are very abusive, & power-hungry. Besides drugs & psychotherapy, there should be alternatives for children (& adults) to get help. Perhaps peer-support groups, where there is ‘openness’ and trust as basic guidelines. That no one is to be degraded, or shamed.

  • I cannot believe what I am reading! there are Tremendous problems with psychotherapists & their profession. I recommend that each and everyone here read the following excellent blog:
    disequilibrium1.wordpress.com/2010/10/10/a-disgruntled-ex-psychotherapy-client-speaks-her-piece /

    I am informing all here in this profession that those of us who have been harmed (and there are Plenty of us) by psychotherapists are starting a consumer rights movement. What has been ‘accepted’ will no longer be.
    What is wrong with psychotherapists? Plenty:
    1)I have spent years seeing different therapists – and had terrible problems with them. It doesn’t matter what they are taught in their courses, or what type of therapy they ‘practice’: they do what ever benefits THEM.
    Examples from just my experiences:
    My first therapist was a manipulative woman, with borderline personality disorder (she was a Classic case). Over time, she showed her true colors. She became ‘competitive’ with me – no matter what problem I told her about , hers was ‘far worse’ than mine – and she would sometimes spend entire sessions telling me HER problems. I was brand new to therapy, & had no idea what good therapy should actually consist of. When I finally left her, she was screaming at me loudly on the phone, then crying, telling me “Everyone leaves me except for you, and now even you are leaving me”. she also accused me of wanting to tell her MY problems in our sessions before she could tell me hers. Talk about boundary issues. Of course, she never apologized.
    As to practically all the others – I have categorized them:
    2)THE SCREAMERS
    These don’t ask you what you want to do re: a problem; they TELL /Command you. And, if you argue/object/fail to follow their commands, then they start the SCREAMING.
    What courses in their training teach future therapists to
    scream at her/his client??? Belittle them? Act superior to them? Literally bark orders at them, in telling them HOW to solve a problem? When I told one about trying to figure out whether to have another child, she stopped me, and began a Lecture on what I must do. Don’t these therapists EVER stop and look at themselves? At their own tendencies?
    A version of this, was when I saw another female therapist because I was having trouble in romantic relationships. All she ever did during the sessions was to tell me, very belligerantly, that of course men didn’t like me because of the way I ‘acted’ – never explaining what that was, and never trying to help me ‘change’.
    3)Strict Belief System Therapists:
    some absolute have a BELIEF, which is inviolable, and which they must make sure EVERYONE follows, as it is the TRUTH.
    One therapist hated men , because her husband had cheated on her. Therefore, all men were blankety-blanks. She could never leave him, as she was a traditional Catholic, so instead, she made sure that her clients were educated in the TRUTH about men. When I told her I was going to leave her, mainly because of her beliefs, she told me “Well, don’t you know that some women were molested as young children and can never trust men.” I reminded her that THAT was NOT my background. Obviously – it was hers. She NEVER cared who I was – She only cared about what SHE had gone through.
    3) THEY USE YOU TO RELEASE THEIR ANGER ABOUT THEIR OWN PROBLEMS
    A male therapist once told me, in a very ugly voice, that his wife was a JAP (Jewish American Princess). THis had absolutely NOTHING to do with anything I was saying to me, or dealing with. I immediately confronted him, and told him I
    was Jewish; all he said to me is “Well, that’s the truth”. He then told me that he also was Jewish , he had converted only to please his in-laws, and that ‘it meant nothing ‘ to him. I looked right at him, and said “that’s a real shame”. He NEVER apologized to me, or looked at what he was saying. Obviously, I never went back to such a bum.
    These types take tremendous advantage of their clients: they know the clients are vulnerable, and desperately want help, and won’t fight back.
    4) The SILENT THERAPISTS
    At least three said NOTHING during entire sessions – when I asked one why she wouldn’t say anything she blamed it on me and my boyfriend at the time (we had sought couples counseling) because ‘we’ had ‘too many things’ going on in our lives. I reminded her that is WHY we were there to see HER. I went on to say that in my next life I would become a therapist & do exactly what she was doing – get paid big bucks for doing NOTHING.
    A version of this: I told a new therapist what I was coming to see her for, (problems with my relatives) and she responded in a VERY superior tone of voice: ‘And THAT bothers you?!’ like I was nuts or something-she never helped me, and should have told me that from the START.
    REAL REASONS WHY MANY ARE THERAPISTS: I am really sick & tired of this profession – I think many therapists are in it because: 1) Many have mental problems themselves, and in a very bizarre way, think they can ‘work them out’ by doing therapy. – a variant of this is they feel badly inside, but when doing therapy on others, are no longer focused on their own problems, and so feel much better; in this way, they don’t care if they help us or not, As they will feel better no matter want.
    2) My fav theory that I MYSELF realized: Many therapists
    can’t get intimate with others, they are too scared, and/or don’t know how. BUT they, like the rest of us, have intimacy needs. so – they fulfill these needs by getting ‘intimate’ with their clients. They do so simply by listening to another tell them their deep problems, opening up to the therapists. After all, when we listen to someone’s deep feelings, we do feel closer to them. THis way the therapist gets “intimacy”
    ( or a weak version of it) without having to be vulnerable.
    Well, that’s about it. I think therapist’s sessions should be randomly ‘listened in on’ by supervisors. Otherwise, there is no way that anyone else really knows what’s going on – and can call them on it. I know NO other profession where the treatment ALWAYS takes place just between the treator and the patient or client. There are NEVER witnesses. It is perfect for these narcissists to get their needs met.