Monday, July 26, 2021

Comments by FilthyPazuzu

Showing 1 of 1 comments.

  • Story of my life. I’m 36, I’ve been diagnosed with and prescribed almost everything under the sun at one time or another, but from my point of view the biggest problem throughout my life is a fundamental and incorrigible resistance to being told what to do by people not worthy of my – or anyone’s – respect and obedience.

    Of course, this state of mind has brought with it some serious problems, and been accompanied by others that may or may not be related: heavy addiction, repeated institutionalization, difficulty keeping jobs, medication to the point of stupefaction.

    My psychiatrist – sadly, the best I’ve found yet – insists I take more medication than I need. I’ve lowered dosages with no ill effects only to have him insist I take the higher dose or prescribe something else. So now I take a bit less than half of what I’m prescribed for most of my meds, but since I tell him I’m taking it all he thinks I’m OK.

    I swear, you get diagnosed schizophrenic or bipolar and the whole world thinks you’re one misstep away from a murderous rampage.

    As for work, I’m a self-employed computer tech. No bosses! Also, if I don’t like a client I can just politely leave and never have to see them again.

    It certainly wasn’t easy getting to this point of relative stability, mostly because society in general – and the mental health profession in particular – make it harder than it needs to be to opt out of the general culture of obedience and conformity.

    Looking at my youngest nephew, it’s like watching myself at a young age. Luckily for him, he has someone who’s already traveled a similar path and can assist him – if he wants it. I certainly know well enough not to insist, but to offer, and let him make his own decisions.

    I don’t know about other people with anti-authoritarian tendencies, but usually that’s all I’ve really wanted: the chance to make my own decisions and not be unfairly punished simply for disagreeing.