Thursday, February 9, 2023

Comments by Orkhid1

Showing 2 of 2 comments.

  • I came across this article & its seemed almost in a synchronicity- like way. Asking myself recently how does one let go? Fear & pain from past issues can be so intertwined deeply that one wishes they would have let go when they first had an inkling that running from deep unease in oneself was only going to make it worse? The reminder in this article that ‘” what resists persists” gives some kind of roadmap and wisdom to let go & that there will be something beneath to catch a person. The unknown. If control is your way of being while moving through life letting go can be terrifying & all the pain you have held down for so long seems daunting to release.Holding onto pain after years can easily becomes ones identity. Until something greater than holding onto the pain starts to emerge & creates an existential crisis where one “must”let go the past in order to be free. Fear vs Love.Possibly that is where healing begins.Loving yourself enough to let go of the pain.Sometimes this place can be even more painful than the pain.And I believe this is where addiction can develop. Obsessing on something outside oneself helps you escape facing the fear inside.Surrendering can be frightening but the reward to find who one really are and be free seems an appealing &
    worthy reward.Thank you for this article. It gives one hope to find their way with some tools to carry along the journey that seems so daunting.[ # 5 suggestion especially helpful .]

  • I very much enjoyed reading your article.The story catapulted me back to memories in my childhood.As a young girl I was often off by myself away from my family lost in such activities as staring up at the clouds.Fascinated at the moving shapes in the sky, but also coupled with a sadness and longing.But I could not define or did not know what the feeling meant as a child.Once while sitting with my mother on our front porch and hearing the sound of an ambulance going by at the young age of 7 I intuitively felt an immediate anxiety and realization that life was not an endless movie we all partook in but it was fragile & vulnerable and could fail.And I then became a mix of dark and light in myself .Excited & curious about life but also a sadness of its impermanence.A sensitive child I took it all in.I struggled with depression and anxiety most of my life and then several years ago was thrust in a very deep depression and spiritual breakdown.And it seemed that all my life I was holding down my joy.And something inside no longer would allow me to be at the helm .While in the grip of a subsequent severe mental breakdown my doctor asked ” Do you try to control things” .I answered yes.And after my drs visit I later reflected on a coworker who once in commenting on my chronic low level depression said to me very matter of factly ” God is moving through you”.I did not comprehend her comment at the time.But later in the throes of the distress of my breakdown I felt she may have been right. I was always suppressing my spiritual side with my head.My heart and ego were at war.I was given an anti depressant.But I still struggled with reconciling my spiritual energy that resided in me with the fear I carried within & holding onto the control of trying not to let go.I was terrified of letting my heart & soul open.My old reality (ego) would no longer be there to hold me.And going into the unknown was scary.There is no one who teaches you what the Divine is.That it lies inside of yourself.And it is part of who you are.I believe the longing I felt as a child when I stared up at the clouds is the longing for the Divine in myself.And so for myself.That I longed to come home and my depression and anxiety were the signals alerting me that I had buried it or lost my way.I am still struggling to find my way.But I am a bit less terrified.And trying to surrender.I’m trying to just be.But I feel the label now of mental illness also.Your article was so helpful to understand that(ones spirituality) is an ongoing process.Part of being a human being.Always spiritually evolving.Thank you for sharing your thoughts.It was comforting to read.(While stumbling toward Bethlehem.) Thank you.