Friday, December 2, 2022

Comments by Somebodyhelp

Showing 14 of 15 comments. Show all.

  • The insiders are the problem , the ones who see a patient for 30 minutes a month and describe there visits as success , yea sure it was for you , you meet an insurance code and got to get paid and go home to the 2 kids , 4 bedroom 2 and 1/2 bath house/condo . The person you helped is living in hell wondering if anybody cares at all , well do you , can you look into a mirror , prescribe a drug that doesn’t affect your mental pain for 1/10 of one percent …yea you go home to the family , you did your job , if he kills himself it isn’t your fault , your overworked and underpayed , you made it to an above 500 season , lost sure in the first round , but you made it and not even on a 15 million a year salary , you know what I thought of you aholes when I was sitting in a physch ward with 7 nuts in somebody piss , omg ..just give me my brains back , ill take the 32 inch multiplex tv and no kingsize bed or nabu food , no more tony romas , no more preve , south beach twice a year , just please please please give me my brains back and out of this hell hole they call phych ward more nurse hatcher more ugly fights more night crew low paid lpns , no more snoring , fighting , nightmares ….sleeping in a room of 7 on an inch of foam , lights flowing in , nuts seeing spiders and snakes , being jumped by a person who has lost there mine , the crack head , the veteran with post traumatic stress who tries to strangle you ever night , the member who quietly repeats a chant then screams out in frustration ..yes a quiet night at the lockup mental ward ..could be worse you could be in Miami-dade lockup , then they would have knives , then they would be really tring to kill you , and 7 in a room would be an open ward , with 305 gang bangers , hiphop killers , skin heads to save you if you join ..a feat worse than death ..1/3 of prisons are filled with mentally disturbed people , and we throw them in with sociapaths etc , great help , kind of like blood letting was a century or so , what wonderful help for broken people , a snake pit , but those sane people treating you in the same environment and the jailors would become the convicts ..PERIOD … life would be better served by euthanasia ….the insanity surrounding the mental institution is so much worse than one flew over the cuckoos nest , we make it sterile now .peace ….

  • Hello Dr Hickey ,
    As i never know what comments are allowed and aren’t I wont hold my breath ..but abilify almost killed me ..and they still push it ..invokana gave ketoacisosis and almost killed me …and Maimi Behavorial almost killed me , but these are still all safe and effective drugs and institutions , if you live for some god unknown reason your a positive example of clinical and pharma accolades , if you die you didn’t do your treatment correctly , and if your life is total misery who cares , your billed and assigned a case number , who really gives a shit , when my wife got a TBI I spent 100,000 of dollars , when I ran out of money those same doctors dropped me , ah yes ethics sees no colors except green , MADLIVESMATTER !

  • Psychiatry dosent have to be this way , the middle finger , it has developed this why like Mental health /big pharma /govt industrial complex as Ike warned us after WW11 that the culture with take us on a cost spending spiral that will end consuming assets but not towards the needs of the mental health patients ..SPEND SPEND SPEND to build beautiful buildings , cafateria , expensive new drugs and more administration personal .
    Like school system the more we put in the less we get out , the system doesn’t listen to the patients , the hold educational staff meetings using someones last done thesis to the newest phychology today article or a new head administrator ideas . None are proven methods , each flawed , studies fulfil there questions with premeditated answers , no real truth in findings .Many bad drugs are leveled on doctors prematurely and without real health benefits and many side effects . The recent FDA has been in bed with the last administration in passing drugs , to much lobbing and not enough testing , winners are chosen based on politics not science ..The system is busted , no real answers but lots of paper work for the govt to make points for medicade/medicare !

  • Hello Dr. Hickey ,
    First I would like to say thank you for getting my comments published !
    Next I would like to say in Miami I had a Cuban born and trained doctor .With a cost per patient of atleast 10x that of his original country he was 5x more patients and no more success !
    Being honest with me as I actually was tring very hard to get better , as many where either just playing the system as they where court ordered , and as being court ordered , even though they where truly sick , they didn’t see it that way as they where non-voluntary and looked at there stay as punishment not help .He said 10 minutes a month to try and actually get somebody better was absurd , he was just warehousing them from hurting themselves or somebody else . We even where brainwashed by a nurse “Hatchet” I called her , like the one from One Flew Over The Cucko Nest “. Before you where to see the doctor , she would come in to TELL YOU how you where doing on medications and what to tell the doctor . This I assume was to speed up the 40 patients he had to document before lunch , and to give the program a good grade for funding .
    I fell for this the first few appointments , then I bucked the system , then nurse RACHET soon retaliated ! She took away some of my priviledges and ignored a severe knee injury which I later ended up at the hospital emergency room getting operated on . The doctor found out I had come into the ER from a phych center and asked me , I quess they have to by law when somebody comes in with an injury , if I had been abused or attacked , as I recently had been both I said yes , he looked at my attendant that came with me and they just starred at each other and that was that , so much for patient safety !
    The doctor atleast latter had me come into his office alone , without nurse Hatchet , where he would say like you have to do it on your own , fake it tell you make it , just keep on tring because it is your best chance . If you got this way thru nature or nuture you have a chance to get back .We can try to stabilize your moods but there is no silver bullet we atleast saw eye to eye , that was some cause of hope , to have a doctor tell you the truth and even though limiting your hopes of cure , atleast an honest doctor was better than a state doctor …the key to any kind of relief from a true devastating mental breakdown is don’t make it worse with other bad habits/drugs , but to fight for your mental status every day , don’t get down in the worst days , and always forget about suicide no matter how hard it gets , because the voices of suicide only makes you go mad even more , I found the times that a seriously got to planning one it the more my mind got delirious , as if that was its way of stopping me , by lowering my capacity to function .In school I had 145 plus I.Q. under super suicidal contention I was RETARTED , is that a natural induced defense system ?

  • Hello Dr. Hickey ,
    As I have responded to you in the past I doubt my comment will make into a general discussion .As there is little need for a mental patient who has gone thru the system with a BS in business and minor in physch and/or a sibling with a PHD from a top 20 doctorate program .
    Beliefs other than ones promoted by main stream mental health complex are not allowed , so I will keep it short as not to waste both are times .
    My 15 year prescriptions of SSRIs is an absolute joke . When I had my 2005 break , I was given Lexapro , wellubutrin , paxil , depoke , serequel and 10 other type of SSRIs with absolutely nothing , I ended up in Miami behavioral in a fog , extremely fuctional till this expisode and never previous was on any depressions meds or past history , I was found divorced , in a strange culture , and no known friends , family , job , or money .
    At first I was thrown a cocktail of drugs to quickly get me on my feet , as a had a manic wife now in south beach doing party drugs and hanging around the wealthy and beautiful people , if I didn’t get on my feet quickly she would surely wipe me out ..which eventually did happen anyway .
    After an suicidal episode of an adverse reaction to a high dose of Librium , then following hospitalization , I was in a 6 month voluntary start program .I was the only one there not court ordered or wasn’t a drug addict or violent criminal doing there easy time vs jail .
    As the only educated nonviolent patient I was involved with a type of class president and was a go between in patient care and doctors , as if this was good for me or not I will not go into .but I got to talk to the once a month doctor assigning medicines to a variety of patients , ages , sexes , dominations , etc . He was overwhelmed and even admitted to this , he didn’t really know how the medicines worked or didn’t , his job was handling the patients , keeping the violent ones as non drugged as possible and keeping the others just from hurting others or then selves , quality of life was not a real concern . I ended up talking and communicating with this old Freudian type Hispanic/Cuban doctor .He was overwhelmed and just tring his best with not much to work with , he said his cure rate was basically Zero , he just was happy or qualified as a positive treatment was no deaths or violence . The multiple of SSRIS only worked in minor or mild mental health cases . True violent of those seeing and or hearing things typical drugs halodol , thorizen , and other tranquilizers where used , sorry about my spelling ! If one was violent they didn’t up the SSRIS and wait 6 weeks to 2 months , that of course is crazy , but saying to someone in deep depression , take 2 and call me in two months if your still alive is lol .
    We have gone from talk health , to lobotomies , to drugs to EST to SSRIS back to Special-K or Ketamine ..back to heir freud and cocaine , sure it makes somebody depressed low on energy to a club rave dancer is possible , like lobotomy , he is smiling but still is in pain . So we went from SSRIS that basically did little or nothing , with tremendous badly hospital health confirmed side effects to Special-K break out , well there are going to be a lot of new middle to upper middle class teens going to the doctor to get help now lol ..this new break thru only exposes the real weaknesses of our current anti-depressants …it is not because of the real success of SSRI but there failure off them that even brings on the thought of a Ketamine break thru , sure it works , as did cocaine in the 1900s as a medical advance , but if we haven’t learned anything is to call a narcotic , rave cat tranquilizer the next big break thru in mental health , well hell bring back Coca-Cola and speak easies , cheaper and atleast the people will die with a tune in there head versus a bullet …anyways doubt this will ever get by the censors , none have so far ! think before deleting !

  • Hello Dr. Hickey ,
    Long time no hear lol , anyways have been going to my weekly Syracuse hutchings appointments and sorry to see Dr Sunny to have left our Mad in America talks !Last time I was on here I was censored for being politically incorrect , so I quess I will have to mind my placebos versus my SSRIS ! Anyways I also have post concussive syndrome from 8 years of middle school to high school to one year of college before I decided , not the local doctor who was god , told me to stop .Funny because now my university is losing quarterbacks to concussions quicker than they can recruit them .Anyway it is way to late for me , I had atleast 4 or 5 concussions a game , playing tailback for tailback u is a 35 plus a game carring the ball plus playing defense and punt and kickoff return , well at 170 lbs versus 230 to 250lbs , that kinda makes you a little punch-drunk .But all the kings doctors and all the kings boosters put humpty dumpty back together again , yea sure they did ! and they call these people DOCTORS…PROFFESSORS…ADMINATRATORS….BUSINESS LEADERS…SPORTS WRITERS …THE LEADERS OF THE SOCIETY .But in essence they are just living there roman gladiator lives thru the players , who aren’t smart enough or old enough or believe there elders would do such harm to them ! But when the establishment sees there golden goose being fleeced , they will do just about anything to keep there standings ! Whether it be for money , excitement , fantasy or just plain kicks …they will argue its for the young adults best .Yes men work better in business situations because they play sports , sure they learn self abuse , cheating , drugs , lying and whos the big shot .well that’s how life works , as my billionaire boss in florida said , if you take abuse ,,you either have to , or you would move on , cost of doing business , or you like it ! Easy for him to say as he was the one dishing it out .Same year I was at a south Beach Bar , Pearl/Niki Beach , and a Miami Football Player named Junior Seau came by , he and I had a couple of heated words over something stupid , then we started bonding over booze , women , and football .Well we went out to the beach , much quieter there and he started talking to me like I was his priest or something .He said he felt down , didn’t feel like playing football was fun anymore and he wasn’t playing up to his All-pro self .He had MOODS , even felt like suicide some days !Well I said I had that feeling years ago and that’s why I stopped , of course I never played pros , let alone made all-pro , but I understood .We chatted a bit and then he went upstairs to his Miami players , and I though ..god ..if he isn’t making it ..with millions , family , doctors , famous , people etc ..I quess I shouldn’t worry so much ! Funny thing …Will Smith was there , the guy that plays in the new NFL concussion movie , I don’t wanna see it because I now they had to politicalize it , the real truth who be to end it or start wearing leather helmets again .Anyway as most of you know he really tried killing himself twice , once he ran his SUV of the road on a hill , didn’t work , then he shot himself in the heart , so his brain could be examined ..and yes he did have the disease , as probably half do .Now I get to the article at hand with my background of having meningitis and almost dying , but nobody knows why , hepatitis from a football related blood transfusion , diabitis form being over weight from depression and lack of sleep , I sleep every third day no matter what , colitis , arthritis , leg pain , back pain …migranes and I take 20 some pills a day which is now shutting down my kidneys ..and you know what ..I have made my peace ..dying doent scare me anymore is just how I go that scares me , and in that I have to be my own doctor .You ask why , well here goes just one incidence , I had just moved to Miami after my younger wife of 12 years had gone thru a 6 year TBI injury from a car accident , so I was already up on nuerology and drugs and phsych as she had , a young model with a masters , tried in the second year of recovery to kill herself , ironically I ended up in the same clinic 12 years later , if would of thought it ! Well she had gotten used to pain killers , and when we left Syracuse after a terrible legal and medical ordeal , she got hooked I quess on recreational opiates , she just couldn’t resist after 6 plus years on scrips , but my story is she went manic , all week all the time parties , Miami is a bad town for after parties and drugs , and I lost her , I had become an alcoholic to deal with the men , drug dealers , cops her etc and when we went on a 21 day carnival cruise for a second honeymoon and to get her out of the clubs , well she was just setting me up for a divorce .and when we got off the boat ,I soon found out I was excess baggage , the years of marriage and all we went thru she said led her to leave , she didn’t want to remember the accident the pain the lost 20s .Sorry she said , but just because you saved my life doesn’t mean I have to be with you for ever in return .So I drank 2 bottles of jack daniels with her friend next door at the house , and we talked about me talking her diet pills and ending it all .Well I did , I took 50 barbs and went nuts , the cops came and I was flying and they arrested me and put me in the squad car , then I said good because by the time I get to jail ill be dead , and they thought I was just drunk , hell my heart was racing so quick I could feel it coming out of my chest !then my wife came home , I fiqure the neighbor must have called her after he called the police to score points with her , she all pissed off , she hates scenes , but goes into the house and sees all her bottles empty and comes out and says if hesays he took pills I believe him , you better call the EMT .So they do , and the EMT comes , and they say I have like minutes to live , and the cops still wont uncuff me , I am kinda of laughing because I had it in with this on maimi-dade cop om the take 3 months before this and he just wanted to throw me in jail , well the EMT, give me anti whatever and iv and oxygen etc and rush me off to the hospital ! I wash there for 2 weeks until my heart stopped going so weird .But my wife already had divorce papers and wiped me out financially and had her new husband , a famous relative of a wealthy family picked out and I was totally depressed and manic like Sylvia plathe in the Bell Jar .It was the final straw in my physcy that put me in final unbreakable depression .I had stood up in the past with at 20 a dead father dying in my arms from a heartattack in the doctors office and having the doctor wisk me out because I was disturbing his nurses work .My aunt burning up in front of me at 6 years old while babysitting me and lighting herself on fire instead of the grill .chased by killers at 8 .almost drowned as a child and the multiple operations and the depression from football concussions I didn’t even know at the time I had , just that I didn’t remember things in school as well and was sick with a headache , I was 5th in a class over 600 in highschool and made varsity sports as atrue freshman !
    Now we get to drugs and depression , well after I got out of the hospital I was incredible mentally sick , I was sent to a Miami doctor who put me on a quick high dose of lithium and said straighten out your wife going to clean your clock ..this just upset me more and I took the lithium like I was supposed to , by the second day iwas not only suicidal but homicidal , I never , ever was one to hurt another person or think of really hurting someone else .I found myself loading a shotgun a had and never used and was going out to shoot all the drug lords that got my wife into it .I laoded the gun then ..I wave of it childhood catholism came over me , I flushed all the pills down the toilet , rushed into my truck and speed down us1 to keywest .just hauling ass to the end of the world . So what did this doctor do , almost turn me into a columbine murderer , just like that , if it wasn’t for mystrong upbringing everthing in me was saying kill ..get even . later that year aread about a young boy the same doctor prescribed the same thing on the first visit and he committed suicide , but the doctor strongly argued that he had saved many more then he had lost , and he was suicidal to begin with , how do you prove a negative , he killed himself because he was suicidal , I saved them because they didn’t kill themselves .During my crazy sick years , I drank to self medicate , over ate , gambled , played the field like never before and generally didn’t sleep much ..I never did any of these activities before , I found out latter that ambein cause all these symptoms amd my Miami behavioral doctors probably knew it , they where one of the largest hospitals in us .anyways I lost everything and gained 80lbs .None of the pills worked , the zolofts , paxils ,Lexapro , antavan ,wellbutrin ,and 10 other crap …I always said if you have to wait 2 to 3 months for a pill to work , if you had a headache or a toothache would you wait 2 to 3 months for it to work ? and whenit didn’t it they would say things like don’t you feel a little better or youarent tring hard enough , just like when they used to tell you to take steroids to gain weight ..what bs ,just agree to make them feel better not you !So know I talked to that clinic in Chicago , the one that puts the funny metal hat on you and turns on the magnets and gives you special K or Ketamine .funny my friend died of a overdose from it , it was a real favorite rave drug in some of the miaimi clubs , I quess those guys cant begoing to jail anymore , they should just get there PHD for curing all those unhappy teenagers and making them into allnight dance parties , what was it the 50s lobotomies , the 70s lithium , the 80s SSRIS , the 90s your guess with shock therapy.
    When are these doctors going to stop going onlong with the drug companies in off brand use , who are they kidding ,killing unborn babies ,gambling loses ,suicidal effects in what 20% of ussers .They actually make there patients feel bad , they say you got to feel better , I am treating you aren’t I , which only causes more depression and frustration .Nobody really wants to her your suicidal .its like cancer used to be , or hiv , or a bad knee on a football team , your the person to avoid at all costs , and the only people who will listen are the ones as bad as you , and when you put two whatevers together , alcoholics , druggies , gamblers , sex addicts ,you just multiply the effect , so when your mentally depressed and you don’t have a somewhat normal person to lean on better pray a lot even if you relly don’t believe , as my Miami doctor used to ask me in the unit , is so and so found god yet , because if he hasn’t we better medicate him some more …god seems to be the biggest placebo of all !
    Well we will see who actually reads this third day no sleep rant lol

  • Hello ,
    I was hospitalized in florida with bi-polar and suicidal thoughts after a family breakdown , they put me on abilify and I started compulsive gambling , eating , sex , and borrowing to support my gambling habit .I had 100,000 of thousands of dollars well before this and NEVER had weight gain …80lbs , or went or wanted o go gambling before .I only found out about the abilify lawsuit this year and wonder if I can become part of he class-action lawsuit .I feel totally lied and cheated to as when I had multiple concussions playing football running back in the 70s ….no jutice for the truly injured !

  • I laugh at these so called experts of major mental disorders , unless you have actually experienced the effect of manic-depressive , or endless hedonistic or polar opposite of it ,you really are relying on just paper research and your own ..non-scientific experiences ! As a child I had an aunt when I was 5 years old burn up 10 feet in front of me , my dad never sick before die in my arms , lost girlfriend at young age and witnessed some horrible events .
    But yes that made me somewhat melancholy or sad ..but it didn’t put me into a horrific negative suicidal spiral like I have experienced in the last 15 years of my life .
    Sure there are people who fathers or mothers didn’t love them and they need a little fraudian jump start …but those of us with extreme depression are mentally wired wrong .I played football and had 10s upon tens of concussions .Each one more debilitating than the last . I was a 96% student athlete in a college town .From my freshman year I felt feelings I never felt before my concussions , like trouble studding , loose of positive feelings , feelings of I called being in a fog or bell-jar thoughts , loose of surrondings ..I forgot how to get home one day like a azlheimers patient like my mom became .
    Don’t tell me a happy gp lucky 3.8 GPA all county athlete that I am SAD.Thats like telling an herion addict the its just a placebo .
    When my beautiful wife with everthing going for her got in a car accident and had a TBI her whole personality changed ..I quess that was just her having depresstion , when I moved to Miami and did the south beach thing and talked to professional athlete who had millions , beautiful women , houses , indorsements , and 100s of friends ..quess what ..they commited suicide .
    Depression is very much REAL,, you treat it like they treated epilepsy in the evil ages are the devil and possession has taken you over .
    Half of TBI dont show up on MRI ..does that mean they went from perfectly functioning people to having trouble walking ,urinating , hearing , seeing ..of course not ..there brain activity is altered somehow .
    How do we explain the supper mentally ill , that see and hear things and jump off buildings to get away from what they think they see ….just having an off day .
    Then there is all this off-label phsych-medicines being given out without anyone really knowing how they work or who they work on ..The real scared of being sued doctors ,or the ones who dont know all the answers ..or as I call the god fixaction ones ..they will tell you try this and if you have any new idealation of suicide or anyother bad sideeffect stop !
    the others dont have the time or warnings to say anything ..I call that dont blame me doctors ..I went 10 years to school and I not losing my license over you .
    I have been given lithium by one doctor and in 24 hours had become like that pilot , just determined to end it all and take out as many of my so called enimies at the time .
    What saved me and others is my Christian faith pounded into me from early childhood , do not take anothers life randomly ….so even though the lithium made me suicidal and homicidal ,which I have never experienced since …I dint act on it because of faith ….and dont underestimate faith when it comes to healing and mental illness .Maybe if the suicidal pilot had faith he wouldn’t have killed himself and others but have gone to a clergy or doctor first .I literally was there myself after the lithium episode ,I wanted to kill myself and as many as I could with me ..something about this type of illness the more you bring with you the better ,like a club for angels .doesn’t make sensce to the average mind but extremely to the sick mind .
    So dont say there is no serious depression , that is insensitive and hurtful to the people who deal with this demon on a minute by minute ,hour by hour ,week by week ,month by month occurrence .At first I thought I was a coward by not killing myself , I was ding 100 paper cuts ,but then I realized it was much tuffer fighting the fight of mental Illiness and just surviving one day at a time ,hoping for some ,yes made breaktthru or therapy or a nano cure .
    But dont ever say people like me and others dont have a real problem , then you become the disease and not the cure !!!!There are some medicines that some patients tolerate well , then there are some with terrible sideeffects , if not for my upbringing and catholism I would certaintly be dead with others ….but there is a definite brain malfunction in most of us , just like diabitus or luekimia or HIV.
    Robin Williams didn’t commit suicide because one of his jokes didn’t go over well , nor did the all pro linebacker ..the basis for a large portion of mental illness is a brain chemical or nuerlogical misfiring we haven’t fiquered out yet ..and yes do sometimes placebos and faith help ..yes of course , just like a POW or somebody in solitary confinement have to believe in some higher power because you cant see the forrest thru the trees .


  • well I am back to this censored site ….to bad life and death today even has to be politically correct ..but unfourtanetly it does ! I have been in somewhat of a remission of late ..gue to antipsychotics ..I dought it thet where only causing health problems before ..why would they help now ? I have seen everthing from Miami billionaires using social drugs to compulsive addictions using pharma drugs to painkillers used to cope everday life with ..or as most our called bi-polar .benzoids are the worst ..they are the doctors street drug of take a little sample and start you on the Bristol-meyer drug addiction plan .at least you know what you are getting when you meet a guy on a corner , some illicit illegal druf of unknown potency or quality ,but atlast that isn’t even true in Miami .They sell oxys ,bloes ,tabs .footballs on the streets and in pain clinics !These drugs aren’t made in a 3rd world country but right here in north America !We aren’t dealing with Columbian cartels or Mexican gupo drug lords but drug kingpins named greenbergs ,smiths ,milneys ,etc .Everyday doctors that will right you a zanax, oxy, methadone,trazadone, ambien , Zoloft,klonopin..if you can pay the going monthly price !Why is a controlled substance ok to give if you pay your doctor once a month ?In florida you can call it in for 6 months before you have to physically come in .Quess you cant do enough harm to yourself or others in 30 days …well how many planes can you crash in 180,or drive over or whatever means you have to cause destruction ?We in this country promote illegal and legal drugs for two reasons .one pure profit and two to keep the other guy controlled so the power brokers can go on gaming the people !

  • If you had a head ache and they said it might take 2 months for the asprin to build up in your system to lessen your headache you would laugh.Cause and effect lol if it takes youe 2 months to might feel better or maybe in 2 months your headache will go away sometime by itself!
    Why would we think a acute disease is slowly countered by a drug that would show signs of possible in a scale of 1 to 10 …thats the way they expect mental patients to speak to them ,,,in numerolgy not in scriptology lol.
    They ..the doctors want you to explain in numbers things they dont either care or understand in english .But they can write down patient A wemt from a level 2 to a level 3 in his mania ….what the hell does that mean in a REAL doctor scientific analysis .
    Take 3 depressents and call me in 2 months …oh and if you start to think about suicide call 911 lol
    Once your there they treat you like shit and some even say things like if you where going to Really kill yourself you already would HAVE OMG i should have died 3 times can a caregiver say something like i sare you to a suicidal patient…i have found more sadistic crazy fools on the other side of the sickness.I think in 100 years they will look upon modern psychology like they looked upon blood letting in the old ages .barbaric .I have gained 100 lbs ,canr sleep ,,,have deep mania ..gambled my life away and have diabitus and cabt enjoy anything enjoyable….boy has 10 years of drugs,hospitals, doctors and being insulted by my own social security system that denies me benefits but gives illegal aliens 10x more….The slaughter of the lambs ….social sites are becoming a giant human psynopsis of borg like humanity and literrally expands virusis not only on the net but the human net,,,,ie ISIS…serial killers etc…why does a greeved or sick mind have to put on social media what antisocial illegal event he is planning on doing like a red badge of honor…are world is getting mentally and psychillay unhealther when it should be getting much better …is this a cause and effect equation or just fate?
    Any Comments ….

  • Thankyou steve ,
    As i was in broward countyStart program i was on suicide watch several times .I was one of roughly 50 men and woman ..mostly with drug problems or psychizophrenia .Non of them where suicidal…the addicts where just tring to get pharma drugs to replace there street drugs and the others just would go in and out of psychosis and usely violent behavior..they would eventually be hallodalled to drewling.Non of the drugs worked very well ..they just kept me sleepy to calm my mania.
    But there where very few people who worked there who took the patients seriously.The nondoctors tried to get sex from the prostitutes..the ones getting there nurse degree where regularly tring to get the people that caused them grief in jail by setting them off.It happened a few times , and when the person attacking tells the cops what happened ..well hes a mental case isnt he ..what B.S.
    The med nurse used her power like nurse rachet …she would tell you what exactly to tell the med doctor what to say …he came once a month and when i wouldnt go along with her i was punished with the few privilidges i had.The doctor talked to me like i was just under extreme mental stress and said i had depression and PTSS and he said the ones who are disllusional wont kill themselves if they find god ..the so called jesus freaks.So they wherent there to really help just get payed and status quo.Most bithched more about there low pay than there concerns of patients.
    While i was there i warned the staff about an ex military patient who was getting more and more psychotic and had threatened to kill me . they said yea yeawe will keep an eye on him ..shit we slept 7 to a room that had a closed door at night ! well anyway i woke up with him pounding on top of me and going nuts .Since my depression i refuse to be violent and just got up with blood on my face and went to the front desk ..they where like do you want to press charges and get the police ..i said wont help him and why didnt the noncrazys due something about it for a week i had warned them..Well when the morning crew arrived they brought me into a little conference and basically said press charges or shut up.How well was this person due in jail with his problems ..not well i think.
    Then i developed a very infected knee from a deadly florida spider bite and the nurse let me go for 2 weeks before somebody was concerned and brought in a real medical nurse …she said i had to go to the hospital right away and was taken latter that day.
    I was with one of the program watchers and the doctor said i have to ask if you been hurt or seen abuse at the facility..i said both .and the doctor looked at the Watcher and talked to him where i couldnt hear him and that was the end of that.
    So even the emergency room doctors ..the first line of defense ..dont care about or believe menatal patients ..whats the point of state regulations if they dont follow them..its like coming raped and saying so and then thay dont do a rape kit and send you home with valium!
    They where afraid of me because i was a volunteer patient and had no criminal charges against me ..the ones who did where to easily dissmissed or put in jail or kicked out of the program.
    Anyways i had one nice counsler who herself had been thru alot ..the other older female head counsler would just classify you and not hear a thing you where saying ..because you all are liars and repeat offenders so you dont know what your talking about.
    My wife who had changed after her TBI accident started acting really narcistic and pathological after she got into the clubbing drugs.I laugh because the new 30 year cure for bipolar is manufactured street rave drugs.Its like telling a person that cant sleep to become an alcoholic .How stupid and are these people sincere or greedy?
    Anyway i was to empathetic to my wife and became an enabler i now realise.But as long as se had plenty of money and sex appeal she could get anything LEGALLY let alone illegally in miami….power and money corrupts in all fields ..doctors are not gods..if anything my lawyer told me pretrial as my wifes doctors started going on vacation or whatever to avoid testifing that if you think lawyers are bad should hear what the doctors lies about and did when he represented them….another story..
    Well here i am 10 years latter 500,000 dollars latter and multiple doctors and medicines and diagnosis.Last march i satarted getting really sick and new i was dying..i now live with my 10 year older brother who considers me and tells me so what a burden i am to him..Anyway i got really sick .couldnt walk , sleep , eat , migraines and muslce pain all over my body. I just kept telling my brother to dont call the hospital or doctors ..this fight went alone for over a week .Then i lost consciousness and found myself in the emergency room at the local hospital..i was emitted with meningitious and in critical condition.I was in ICU for 2 or 3 days where i saw 3 psychiatrist doctors and one nuerologist.I knew i was dying and thought this would be an honor way to go .So after 5 lumbar punctures and loss of much of my vision…inability to walk ..vomiting loss of hearing and xrays of some type of gray area in the back of my head on c-scan etc .oh i local vision center came bye and looked at me and said i had rental bleeding and compression on my eyes etc ….the doctors and nurses ignored me becaue a had Klonopin and past suicidale thoughts.So the original doctors who where nice had to leave for rotation .i got sent out of the icu to level 4 the gyn. dept.The foreign doctor did not know of my record and said i was a liar and fake !!!!i was crazy she actually told me and my brother OMG who sicker the actual one with actual life threatning diseases or the foreign doctor bitch and her hack nurse telling me i was a liar and ignore my REAL Injuries .Wonder why i want to die ! TO many people in our regular health system are in it for the wrong reasons
    So i had to go to a rehab center that basically was a holding area for old and bed ridden patients who where warehoused .I threw my wheel chair out and got in trouble for bathing on my are allowed only one shower a week even when we had daily heavy rehab.
    I was next to a poor bed ridden elderly blackman who was feed by a machine and shit and peed in his panse.His feeding alarm would go off ataround 12 am everynight and no one could turn it off because they had only one nurse for a 6 or 7 floor nursingcare home ! Forget the medicines where routinely given out wrong if sometimes at night not at all .but how couls i sleep when they wouldnt give me any hard sleeping drugs and the alarm is blasting at a jet deciple loudness . At least i found out i was 90% deaf in my right ear .So anyways i got up ..i was the only one and bithched about everybodys treatment .needless to say a 3 month rehab turned into a 4 week no test me stay!!i was glad to get out of there ..10 months latter i still havent seen a hearing doctor etc just like those poor V.A. patients.Money talks and mental patients go thru hell.I understand that no one who has had mental illness can actually feel the can certainly emphasis or try to help..thankyou .but unless your mind doesnt fuction basiclly normal…you cant actually feel or understand the pain….it is just the opposite ..many people act towards me and other mentally ill patients like we are nonhumans in many fields.Its like when people got aids in the early 80s…they think you deserve it and they are also afraid or not really concerned about us .Where just crazy..Anyways thanks for caring and tring to make your field better instead of the madness treating madness .

  • After going thru 10 years of hell ,my wife divorced me and ran off with another man after we moved to miami .I got drunk and tried to commit suicide in a desperate drug depressed induced mania .I ended up almost dead and in the psych ward totally depressed and also being catholic embarased of what i did.I was sent to a local psychiatrist and prescribed several regular antidepressents and got not only depressed but terrible manic .I would tack lexapro and wallibutrin and also effoxor .I never took any antidepressents before! My mania got worst till a couldnt sleep ,eat or watch tv.My doctor sent me to another more quailified doctor in miami where he said i was bipolar and needed to take lithium right away before i ended up dead .I gladdly took the medication because i was going crazy and under real pressure from my wife in the divorce .I took 2 or 3 pills and started to feel less aniety , then i took my 3rd or 4th dose and went into a suicide /homosidal trance.I have always been very considerate of life and never ..even under extreme distress thought of seriously hurting someone .But now i found myself loading my shotgun and logically in my mind at the time killing people who had hurt me or betrayed me .I luckily for me had a deep catholic and morale backgroung from my parents !I threw the medication down the tiolet and got into my truck and drove off, ruining my divorce case and future life and went to a cheap motel 6 and basically barricaded myself in.I was getting parinoid(i was previously baker acted) that the police or my wife …who was planning against me …where coming for me .Anyway after several days of depression and actually overdosing on the pills besides lithium i was giving …which after taking with whisky i went and threw them up.I called my wife up and told her i left the house for good and she had a fit! After all we had pets and lots odf assets i left without locking the door .Anyways along as she got me to sign over the deed to the house and power of attorney ..she took me to a 6 month behavioral program called headstart in broward county.I knew i had lost the last 20 years of my life savings but if i was dead what difference did it make .This lock down clinic was for mainly crack heads , rapist , alchohol and most where there for court order programs .Anyways i stayed there for 7 months and never got better , i saw a doctor once a month and was basical told by the only nurse in the program what to say was like one flew over the cookuo nest.After 7 months i was on depokot, seroquel , adivan,and another drug or two.
    I was no better when i left and told them so , but the money for the prograM WAS UP.
    I combined with another psych nurse who i meet at a hospital and lived with her .If i was healthy i never would have talked to her let alone live with her..but i was in survival mode.I had deep deep depresion alone with now deep aniety and mania .I felt like my skin was burning and my aniexty lead me to be scared to go out of the house!My girlfreind for my birthday gave me a wwekend at a local casino..i had never been in one before .At first i was like a lockin..i was afraid of all the people and noise! Then slowly we started gambling and drinking ..i started to relax and feel better.Then to make a long story short i became a compulsive gambler and drinker.I was at the casino ever day , i went thu 100,000s of dollars and pawned every precious thing i owned …it acted like the cocaine and drugs i was told to users .I went into debt..before i never even missed a payment and usually payed cash .So i found myself dead broke and in huge debt.I was going monthly to miami behavorial center and told my doctor .He said no problem ..ill right you a note for your bankruptcy judge because one of the sideeffects of antideppressents is gambling!Great tell me know!Anyways my girlfreind overdosed and was told she would not live ..she also was on antideppresents ……i after a year or two went off the drugs and became basically functional….non suicidal and working well ….So i was almost the combine killer because of lithium ..great..then i loose everthing ..then i do things i normally wouldnt .I after 2 years of no medicines at all lived a Somewhat normal life then my company went into bankruptcy and i slowly a year and a half started having panic attacks ..this led me to a doctor who prescribed zanax ,zoloft ,and trazadone .I tworked for a couple months ..then i kept increasing my dosages until it had no effect at all..i was not sleeping for days and had that aniexty attack non stop…i had lost it again and to make stories short went to hire a person to kill me while i could .I almost got it done but my BUDDY drove me to my hometown and after taking 5,000 dollars and my car dropped me off at the local emergency room.My wife had been 2 weeks in this pshych ward yeaes before from a TBI and i new the one doctor .Nothing helped and i was there 2 months until they gave me klonopin…This helped and i was released only to learn they wouldnt give me klonopin outside of the hospital .Great ,get me out of the hospital and then cut me off ..what ever happeded to do no harm.I had several football concussions and think this is where alot of my deppression comes from..i had compalined in highschool and laughed at.Anyway i asked for shock treatment which they said because of my previuos head injury it would be to dangerous ..yet when my 26 year old wife with a TBI years before they reccomended shocktreatment which i said no to .So the phsyciatric doctors say one thing one day and a complete opposite the next .they have no clue except to give out serontonin uptake drugs and call people bi-polar with no medical facts…its like the old days of lobotmys.I agree with this doctor ..i not only became suicidale with these drugs but homocidal which i never felt before.Once you have been labelled bi-polar your treated or i have been like your a lepper …i could tell you unbeilevable stories…I am sorry for going on ..but i feel like i am dieing a death of a thousand cuts .
    Thanks for reading and missspelling