I never knew what it was like—-to inhabit my body.
I was always
inhabiting
others bodies in my body
since the cave opened and my heart beheld the world.
My soul stood still in another world——-a world out of this world
a striding world within worlds
of other sacred worlds.
I fed on a breast that fed on me
and the motherlessness of this
hollowness haunted me.
These days, people pretend there is no such thing as evil.
Purporting to existential kink–
non-duality popular among the spiritual elite.
I wonder if I can trust those people—-
the ones who think there is no evil.
The ones whos indifference
ignorance
ignites in the eyes
of soulless bodies
within bodies
who kneel at the feet of the
heartless.
The ones who have not dared to look at a vacant house,
a house inhabited by some other house
and pretend that any house
is a home.
***
This poem is about what happens to those of us who have childhood developmental trauma. Rather than having space to develop our sense of self, we become vessels for other people’s agendas and uses for us. This is an ethics issue, and it is paramount that we begin to create a culture of child-rearing, where children are mirrored and reflected well, so that they can develop a strong sense of self.
***
Tara Rae Behr is a psychotherapist, poet, and singer-songwriter. Her work is informed by love, interpersonal phenomenology, and Christian mysticism. She received her masters from Denver Seminary in 2017 and has been in private practice for the last three years in Cheyenne Canon, Colorado Springs.
Website: tararaebehr.com
Instagram: @behrtara
***
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