Comments by James Hall

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  • Hang in there Spring2023.

    I have seen TMS cause psychosis as well although it is rare. It could be transient. I wrote another piece more about exactly how TMS causes injury and some of what we have learned from it. Its here in MiA –

    You can talk to others in the Victims of TMS Action group (VTAG) Facebook group or send me an email at [email protected].

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  • Jan,

    I entirely agree. I get all sweaty and nervous and stressed out when I go, even with doctors that I know and work well with now. However before I would be incredibly worried I would feel obligated to comply with instructions from the doctor that I knew were unhealthy and dangerous for me. Of course, I would never speak my mind when I was there and then comply in some fashion with the orders or go see another doctor. I find it very interesting that the very vast number of us are indoctrinated to comply with this mentality.

    Even now I still get very nervous but my conversations are always even and open with my opinion being just as important as the doctors. I also found doctors that listen and respect me, which was not an easy task. I feel very badly for all the people that don’t have that, which by my estimation is most folks.

    It has taken me years to get to this spot, and I likely have years to go before I can really be stress free stepping in there. In any case I will always be on high guard, I feel its more dangerous than walking down a dark alley at night.

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  • JanCarol,

    I found the same time. It seems as though some peoples systems process it out while others do not and others develop severe CNS agitation and injury from it not unlike some TMS symptomologies I have seen. It is really well documented and more common than I thought.

    One particularly interesting thing I did end up learning with the help of a friend of mine is that Iron contrast instead of gadolinium(what they most commonly use now, that I think we are casually referring to here) is actually even more effective for MRI readings and it obviously handled and processed by the body much more naturally and effectively. It blew my mind especially when I started looking into it.

    My doctor wanted to do a follow up MRI and I asked for iron contrast instead and they said sorry no one uses that anymore its too rare… I thought hmmm… Iron is more rare than Gadolinium… Interesting. Then I declined it entirely.

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  • That’s very interesting as well.

    Perfectly glad to help, please reach out if you have any more questions.

    The mind and body have great capacities to heal if we give it the space to do so. I am glad you don’t have any of the more severe symptoms that I often see but i know that what you are experiencing isn’t easy either.

    Hang in there and thanks again for reaching out Eve

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  • Eve,

    Thank you so much for writing. I have heard of many people experiencing virtually the same thing, having benefitted and then having to go back after not long. My suspicion by your comment is that you are not entirely bought into the harm paradigm of TMS and that’s perfectly fine, each one of us has to figure it out for ourselves.

    There are really two perspectives on this.

    The first is much as you mentioned, that TMS will help you and has the potential to give you lasting relief from your depression and maybe even more symptoms of discomfort. So if you believe that I suppose it makes sense to try it again, but i sense your apprehension, maybe your gut is telling you something else is awry? If i was in your spot i would certainly be wondering about the fatigue.

    The second perspective is the one that I share and opponents of ECT actually share as well. That is that electromagnetic treatments offer insult to the brain, and it is always harmful. Now, the kicker here is that our endocrine system will actually boost our feelings of wellbeing after a head injury to give us what we need to survive it. However the physical injury still exists there and after that system ramps down, the real damage becomes apparent. Hence the delayed nature of electrical injury, not just in ECT or TMS, but with lightning strikes, repetitive low voltage injury and high voltage injury.

    A primary manifestation of that delayed injury is… Fatigue, your nervous system is now on overdrive trying to process all the same environmental stimuli that it is now impaired to do along with all kinds of extra work trying to heal itself. There are all kinds of reasons for the fatigue but the fact is that it is delayed and it happens to virtually all who are injured by TMS.

    In ECT there is phenomena called the death spiral. It is when someone gets ECT and find relief then, every three to six months their symptoms return and they get another round. The problem is that every time they go back their getting additional injury until it is far too much for their bodies to sustain and they are seriously or permanently disabled or die. It is a very difficult spot to be in, getting relief and then having everything come back, so we must question why THAT phenomena is happening, because it is very dangerous indeed, it is a mental trap for those who are having to decide to keep getting treatments or not.

    I was surprised to find out that many people in my TMS group are actually two, three or even more time patients of TMS and they kept going back until they were severely disabled then they came into the group and shared. When i speak with them, I am always amazed at how lucky they were they did not get severely injured the first time, since I have quite a few people in the group who are severely injured after just one TMS treatment. It doesn’t really help matters because they are injured now but it is quite an interesting phenomena. We all have different tolerances, bodies and brain so we can all tolerate different amounts of TMS. I think maybe the most tragic thing is for someone who has made it through quite a few unscathed to keep returning until the do become injured.

    That being said I would like to challenge you to question or ponder deeper just one notion of what you have said, that TMS stimulates Neuronal activity. Do we know that’s true for you? Do we know that the stimulation of neuronal activity translates to feelings of wellbeing or the relief of depression? When I say do we know, I mean have we been provided evidence?

    So to answer your concerns more directly, yes the rebound phenomena exists. Its just a matter of why it is happening that is important for our decisions going forward.

    And lastly, if you are feeling quite distressed the one piece of good advice I give everyone is to take the time to think it through, there is no rush for anything. Make sure you feel you have made the right decision before taking the next steps.

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  • Yael,

    First of all, I can’t thank you enough for sharing your experiences. The narrative and detail is incredibly important in my mind for everyone an maybe even yourself to understand more of the full picture of what is happening to all of us and each of us. I remember sobbing while i wrote my experience which was a huge process of waking up to me, and then when i reread it I am given the gift of memories I can no longer recall. Making a conscious effort to retell and recall these experiences is powerful for many reasons, I wonder if the oral traditions of our ancestors possessed much more power than just a history. I am glad you are a part of that.

    I understand these cognitive changes fairly well, Its my conclusion that after my experience with TMS that many of the changes we see in ECT patients are the same. TMS fails to produce, as of yet, many people with long term memory loss but the functional memory problems are almost mandatory. In fact I think the functional memory loss accounts for some of the reports of success, but that’s another story – people don’t want to remember and it could ease rumination.

    I wonder if you have identified any source for the agitation you speak of(liken to or possibly internal akathisia)? I try not to get overly concerned with it, but for myself I am drawn to understanding it because it is so significant an experience.

    AS an example, my first experience with it was when taking lexapro, but after buspar was introduced it resolved. I never experienced it again until a few years after TMS. I began a strict dietary routine that included a detox period, for the second time, and this time a week or two in I had it again but this time it would stay and pulse in and out of my life for the next six months or so, and I am still very concerned about it as I often feel it looming as if it is waiting to break through. So while the Lexapro was the obvious first cause, the second was – as i understand it to the best of my ability – brought on by toxicity after already having sustained a serious repetitive TBI. This is a very physiological explanation, because I do not really have an emotional reason. At the time they occurred there was really no significant shifts or ramping up of emotions or trauma being stirred up – things were not pleasant to be sure – but they were even. I am curious if you have any pontifications on yours? I do think this kind of information is very valuable.

    The other part of your story that REALLY jumped out, of course all of it was wonderfully informative and helpful in my understanding, was that you brough up this idea that empathy was perhaps the most dangerous social mechanism in determining your care and possibly a massive liability.

    I have had very similar thoughts that kindness has been responsible for my own harm and that even on a very large scale it is very harmful. In fact it seems that psychiatry gets by as this kind of social compassion and therefore they do not need any objective evidence of their actions and motives. It was not always this way, but when it comes to my medical treatments, maybe i would rather be governed with an iron fist of objectivity or restriction than be able to argue or convince others of a treatment subjectively, because like you, I will always win that one, its a talent – and apparently a liability. I too convinced my loved ones to let the treatment pass when they did not trust it and would not allow it initially. I am very curious what you think with your experience?

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  • Yael,

    Absolutely, my pleasure of course.

    I remember when I was experiencing it my mind was blown with this need to desperately try and understand what was happening to me. When I had figured it, I actually felt I did not have a right to confess to others I thought that I was experiencing Akathisia because many people think or say it only happens on psych meds or during withdrawal. I was very lucky that a good friend of mine saw what I was working with and confirmed for me that it had been established that Aka can come from head injuries and other severe CNS harms or injury. She then went further and identified specifics about my experience that shared commonalities that others regularly disclose in their experiences with Aka as well. It helped me solidify and better articulate what I was experiencing.

    But the main take away with this experience and my others has been that when we share our experiences, think critically and compassionately we enable incredible discovery and relief for others. Just like when my friend helped confirm my thoughts about Aka. Then there is this synergistic effect where more people are talking and being honest and understanding, and we seem to figure out even more or uncover even more truth. The world is completely preoccupied with scientific discovery when our most powerful and effective tool is likely social discovery. This kind of discovery that takes place when we understand and share ideas which then leads them to take on a life of their own, by which has to be believed and accepted by everyone – that’s a pretty high standard of scrutiny(provided we avoid groupthink) far higher than a few doctors or PhD’s(who are just as likely to suffer the consequences of groupthink), in my view anyways.

    I am rambling though but I am sure you take my meaning, I am very glad to hear you have written another! Looking forward to taking a look now.

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  • Daisy,

    I firmly agree with your perspective. I think it is objective and wise. Experiential evidence is incredibly important and should be counted highly and objectively – but honestly. I had not thoughts about subdivisions among that class yet, but in that light i think it is fair of course to put an equal weight on what we find. I wish we could get to a place where experience was so well digested further analysis was appropriate for further advancing our understanding of how that breaks down.

    You bring up an interesting topic of the legal system. The fact that doctors opinions weigh in more than mountains of experiential testimony is problematic. It creates an imbalance of evidence in the system, along with the incredible problem of access to justice and the extreme financial prejudices legal firms hold against their prospective clients it is virtually useless and creates another barrier to the truth to the general public, but I digress and you bring up an excellent point – the supreme irony is that it is virtually impossible to prove malpractice against a doctor or lawyer and both professions are perpetrating a level of misconduct, negligence and malfeasance that is – i am willing to guess – at an all time high, by far and wide in terms of the number of instances and commonality of occurrence. It is almost as if their expression of fear on the matter is meant to keep people from actually trying to talk about how rampant the misbehavior is because it is quite clear no one is doing ANYTHING about it, and the legal system deters it to the highest degree possible without outright approval of it.

    I have found that they detest being expert witnesses simply because it will end up expelling them from the fraternal order of quackery and they end up on the outside – the one that would testify against his brother and is thus a mutinous betrayer and worthy only of the deepest circle of damnation according to their own minds. It is incredible to see the ones who do testify to the truth but they pay a heavy price, not one of malpractice because if they do speak up it is airtight as their consciences demand it, but they are branded a traitor and usually branded doltish somehow as well when nothing could be further from the truth, surely if they were fools they would be torn apart in court and the media, but instead their testimony is buried along with all the studies of easily accessible and natural healing.

    I hope that answers your question, based on what i have learned on the matter Daisy.

    BTW, I am incredibly glad to see the knowledge you have gained on voltage gated ion channels. Some of us suspect that there are cascading channelopathies developed from electrical harms, in the mainstream it appears it has only been established as a result of chemical toxicity but it seems clear to be a result of rapidly alternating high strength electrical fields and or non ionizing radiation generally, I would be willing to suspect like in Havana Syndrome. Science is not sure if the brain is chemical or electrical or both, however based on the development of these channelopathies it seems they both play an equal role or are equally impactful in human physiology.

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  • Richard –

    Thank you for taking the time to make these citations and links so i could get more information, certainly information i had been missing.

    While I am beginning to see your perspective and be persuaded towards it, I am left still failing to see the evidence of its validity.

    Where are the words of Healy’s promoting or exalting ECT? I don’t see a single word saying it is a good treatment or even a positive one? Maybe I missed something but i read the quote you cited and about an hours worth of the linked page. Where are any irrational ideas on the subject?

    This is what I do see – Healy states “None of this is to say there isn’t brain damage on ECT. Poisons, poison. Mutilation, mutilates. And a convulsion is never a good thing.”

    I see Healy stating the harms and eluding to the potential harms and then reviewing the data and evidence around it. He does claim that medications are being prescribed in a more reckless manner than ECT which I think is a fair and evidenced argument. He is most certainly not denying that ECT does serious harm either.

    I see that he is very clear that the harms of ECT are not well articulated or studied and evidence is hard to find. This is entirely true, the memory problems from ECT are very hard to prove – i know this because i have severe cognitive problems from TMS around memory and functional memory, executive function significantly changes after electrical fields are repetitively introduced into our brains, and while this is clear form experiential perspectives, it is not at all Clear by most standards of testing cognitive function. Why is that? Tests of cognitive functions are generally poor and unclear, we do not even have informative dynamic standards of testing cognitive function and while it can be done well, most researchers disagree on what a good measure is – so the evidence is muddled scientifically, no surprise and Healy astutely points out that the evidence is indeed unclear. Also he points out very astutely that imaging diagnostics do not show the damages well, and this is absolutely true they do not. There is evidence there but it is incredibly problematic to show PROOF of harms, there are a lot of other things that change the physiology of our brains in very small ways that can be seen, and unless you have a very clean patient before and after scans of ECT then you aren’t getting anywhere, but this does not get around the fact that the harms of ECT do not even show up on most standard scans, you may be able to see something on SPECT, PET, or fMRI but this is a very nuanced understanding of the scans and brain damage that a physician would have to have to read it, if it even shows at all. The truth is as Healy states, imaging is not advanced enough to see the harms, they could only be observed truly upon autopsy at this stage of science.

    There is also the matter of delayed harms with ECT, the vast majority of the harms produced by ECT are not evidenced until 2 weeks to 6 months after treatment, there is a primarily delayed manifestation of these harms, which the medical model is notoriously bad at measuring as well.

    That being said, from what I read, Healy is simply being pragmatic and objective. He also states that for every ECT patient that sees a benefit that at least one would be pointlessly harmed. This is also a paradigm that I have seen. I am not going to fault Healy for being honest and pragmatic about what he is seeing, nor do i think anyone else should. Healy makes no beans about the harms of psychiatry AND the fact that he uses the tool of psychiatry on his patients. He simply claims to do what every other doctor should do, he measures the danger and if the danger outweighs the risk, he acts. Do I agree with that? No i dont think psychiatric drugs or treatments are worth any risk at all, but many people i trust and admire do and so i consider their opinions thoughtfully and thoroughly.

    I admire Healy’s honesty on the matter given what i have read, and what you have provided, and I do not think it could be considered support for ECT, unless you say he also supports the use of drugs – the same drugs he is warning about. Healy is advocating for informed consent on EVERYTHING, and with ECT informed consent is a hard issue because while those of us who have experienced it have a clear picture, those who have not and are trying to objectively paint a picture without experiential evidence will always fall drastically short, as does Healy here, but I do not see any argument that he is being unreasonable or lacks objectivity or honesty – or that he is promoting ECT any more than psychiatric drugs. He does say that Doctors are more cautious about ECT because the harms are more overt so it is underutilized compared to drugs but that is another matter as well and does not constitute promotion in my mind.

    Of course I am entirely open to the contrary but I am still looking for the evidence.

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  • Richard –

    I can see you agree with yingyang, which doesn’t necessarily make him right although I see your point. While ECT is a dangerous treatment, it is electrical and not chemical. My thought is that there is a problem because no medical doctor or psychiatrist is an expert in either one because they do not study the physics behind them or the whole spectrum of biomedical effects. However in Healy’s case there is even less evidence he knows about the specific effect of ECT. It may be wise to elicit a conversation or learn more before we assume he is both an expert and promotes ECT currently.

    What evidence do we have that he is a promoter of ECT or is world renowned for his advocacy of ECT as Michael said? I searched Healy and ECT on the net and came up with a repeat of a single quote he said about ECT where he denies evidence of long term effects of ECT, which is from quite some time ago. Is there something I am missing here? If so I would love to read up about it and get to the truth, honestly.

    I am seeing a really concerning element of our community where we are incredibly critical of each other, even just as much if not more critical of each other than psychiatry. I understand the feelings of betrayal when we have conflicting view points, but I think it is critically important we grow beyond those reflexive feelings towards a place of acceptance and community despite some non critical difference(hence the case of an opinion by someone who has not read up on the subject), because in my mind they will be worked out in time as long as we share openly and honestly the truth about what we find without disowning them.

    You are critical of Healy because of this quote he made about ECT some time ago, but where would be without his efforts? Could you have made the same contributions he has? I certainly could not have given quite a few factors and am exceedingly grateful for his contributions even though he may commend the very treatment that has brought me immeasurable pain.

    Dr Breggin has contributed to the case against psychiatry for his entire life, relentlessly and now we abandon him and become critical of him because we either don’t understand or agree with his findings and thoughts? Who has sent Breggin the kind, well worded, clear and concise evidence proving his stance on covid wrong? Who has argued that Breggin does not have the right to disagree with someone elses narrative because he sees the evidence differently?

    I have not closely followed Breggins work on covid so i cannot speak on it but after his lifes work on psychiatry i certainly think it is perfectly fine to be loyal or at least leave him free of obtuse criticism and not accuse him of derailing our community. None of us agree about everything, most of us think quite differently about things which i find wonderful and fascinating even if it is dangerous.

    I am not particularly worried about our ramblings here but I am concerned about the level of malcontent we hold for each other in this community and the lack of flexibility of mind we see each other with. Up ending, dismantling or making a sound argument that we want heard against psychiatry will take a tremendous effort and no lack of clarity. If we are set against each other, without the kindness and acceptance that we would want for ourselves then we may fail.

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  • YingYang,

    Perhaps I should have been more clear about my thoughts. I do no think asking Healy about ECT is relevant to this podcast. If anyone thinks someone must be an expert in ECT, because they are an expert in Drug harms, they would be entirely wrong. It is a completely different science. It is liken to asking a famous actor or sports player to do your taxes – one does not translate to the other. Asking Healy his thoughts on ECT simply because there is an opportunity to is not considerate or worthwhile. Why would it be done? To gratify the people who think he doesn’t know the truth? Or try to shame him? His opinion on ECT is likely just as relevant as any other psychiatrist. Do we have any evidence he is an expert(beyond any other doctor) on ECT or other electrical treatments? In either case it does not relinquish him from the responsibility of his actions either.

    People generally seem to have the propensity to project thoughts of expertise or value onto others whom they admire or value an opinion of on a certain topic. No person is brilliant on all measure of things, and we should not expect as much. Healy is just an ally on drug harms, as fallible as anyone else we know, we should not expect more form him, or ourselves.

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  • Acjones,

    I am glad you have been able to get your way into the group. Hopefully you are finding additional answers there.

    You bring up a very important topic of nerve pain. The more time goes on the more we see reports of new and worsening nerve pain after TMS treatment, not subtle but severe. I developed severe lower back pain 3 months after TMS, which i have never had in my life, and it developed right in the window for onset of delayed electrical injury. At first i thought it did not seem to fit well but sure enough i found studies showing lower back pain was linked to electrical injury. The current that is generated by TMS can travel the entire CNS in nano seconds and it can wreak havoc virtually anywhere in the body. We have seen it quite a bit now. I am sorry to hear that is how it has manifested for you.

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  • maedhbh,

    You have concluded correctly about electroshock treatments, the treatment cognitively impairs the patient so they can no longer ruminate, which eliminates most forms of both anxiety and depression. This is why they produce efficacy, along with endocrine responses that may make you feel euphoric. But as we all know the cost is horrible, it is self evident in the benefit that it is only possible through harm to the brain and central nervous system which is a one way street and also not disclosed to or described to patients.

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  • Gayle, that is such an important finding. I know from your last comment it sounded like it was a hypothesis, were you able to establish some diagnostics around it? As much as you feel comfortable sharing, I am sure would be very helpful to help us establish some basis for how this injury is manifesting. If the situation is the same, no worries.

    I can tell you that an expert I am in touch with has identified additional mechanisms of harm and I am waiting to get the documentation on it, I will share it as soon as it is made available to me in full measure.

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  • You have done great James.

    As someone who was harmed by an electroshock treatment, I do not expect Healy to be an electrical engineer on top of an expert on drug harms. To be honest he is being objective about the evidence that he has access to. The advantage I have is my own personal experience paired with what i have personally learned from others, then I had the freedom of time to learn what i needed to about biomedical and electrical physics to understand the reality of the harms being perpetuated by electrical treatments.

    I do not expect anyone to inherently believe me just because I was harmed by psychiatry, i expect people to believe me because of the evidence I can produce for them, being research, studies and an incredible amount of testimonial evidence. What I do not expect or want from anyone is for them to believe me or anyone else just because we are apart of the same community or because we are like minded on another issue. It is incredibly important that people only speak on things THEY think are true and if Healy doesnt think electrical harms are to the extent that some people report he is doing the right thing and it would discredit all his other work if he did not do that, and that would be far more devastating than him saying electroshock harms are over stated.

    I welcome the chance to challenge his ideas and statements on this subject but as friends and peers, just like so many others who have thought the same thing only to realize the truth for themselves because this was the natural process every person has to transact to genuinely understand anything.

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  • That is dark indeed Boans, I appreciate you sharing as its best of course to be aware of whats happening in other places as we may not be aware of it, but it does not mean its not happening or on its way. Of course we do see instances of the state forcing the drugging and shock treatments of children which amount to torture under the UN convention on the subject, but that sounds a little different.

    Take care and stay well, as well Boans.

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  • ant Rh – This is an interesting query to be sure.

    I think its fair to say your skeptical of the potential harms of TMS which makes sense based on the picture you have of how the energy your using works in your research, which is troubling, but not just troubling in the context of this conversation but rather that it is a reflection of a much larger understanding in the medical community whether that is academic research, private research or practice.

    The fact is that the harm being done is microscopic, if the damage could be readily seen on any MRI or an anatomical MRI these would be overt harms and likely well known, but they are not. I mention in my article the primary mechanism of harm is electroporation of the cell walls, which is an incredibly small evidence of harm so it should follow that unless we are doing microscopic observations or studies post mortem there is no current way to see the harm being done, and it certainly does not mean that harm is not being done. In fact evidence of neurological harm is quite obvious although it is not being documented in TMS studies, it is also not even being considered or looked for in TMS studies.

    This is a simply known fact to those who are working with non ionizing radiation, and understand the biophysics of how these energy fields interact with the human body. The warnings are all there and it is well studied, however when we cross fields into medical science instead of physics, now no one understands these effects? That’s rather convenient. It really is not that hard for a medical researcher to speak to a physicist about the risks to the human body of dealing with these types of energy. It took me awhile to understand what was happening and what was not happening, but if I could figure it out, well it is absolutely and unequivocally unacceptable that professionals who are experimenting with and selling this type of technology be allowed to claim ignorance.

    So the greater question is, here where you have evidence of harms that are not visible… will you continue your research? Will a doctor continue TMS even though they have direct evidence it is causing harm that is not easily detectable with imaging and diagnostics? Were you even trained on or educated on the fundamental physics you are using and the impacts on the human body? Because when I found the experts, the NASA scientists and researchers who have testified before congress about this energy and the impacts on the human body it was plain as day what was happening. One actually told me they were waiting for someone to show up with evidence of the harms of TMS, because they understand the theoretical potential of the harms from their work very well.

    I have a friend who has electrical injury and she codes every time she attempts to get an MRI and can no longer get them. Tell me are CT scans safe? If we have the appropriate perspective we get the full picture. It is easy to say MRI’s are safe but they are not, virtually every doctor and researcher will tell you CT scans are considered safe, but they cause cancer. The over simplification of dealing with these types of energy is not helping anyone and in fact it is costing some people their lives. I now know three people who have died as a direct result of TMS injury.

    I am genuinely grateful for your offer of help, as I am for all of them but tell me, who needs the most help here, me or you?

    When we see things through the lens of truth we will be capable of genuinely helping each other out but until we have been liberated of our indoctrination we will continue to hurt each other whilst trying to help. I see it every day.

    If you want to help, learn about the physics of what is happening here and what you are handling in your research. Take a look at how when and why these injuries are occurring and help to explain them in a way that people will understand and listen to. That would be sometime worthwhile. It may be helpful if you stop rationalizing away all the ways in which harm is not being done as the nature of TMS is invasive and it is something being done to another human being which does not need it to be done at all. Just because you are not observing harm does not mean it is not occurring. Did you catch the part of this article talking about the delayed nature of electrical injury? Are you following up with your research subjects? Do you think TMS researchers are following up and doing thorough cognitive assessments before and after treatments? Are they looking to assess mitochondrial function three months after TMS exposure? These are basic fundamental scientific questions for safety that aren’t even being considered or talked about.

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  • Howdy Boans,

    Sorry If I missed any of your previous comments. I went quite awhile at the beginning of the year not feeling well. Surprise surprise.

    I heard a bit about this use of TMS for dementia a little while ago and it frightened me quite a bit, but I already knew before that, that TMS is most often used in geriatric communities. I immediately recognized the danger of this scenario for people whose cognitive abilities might already be in decline or more susceptible to decline or misinterpretation. Like i mentioned in my comment to Jan, its really just a more sophisticated form of lobotomy at its core. TMS attempts to relieve mental discomfort with cognitive distortion or impairment. If you perform this on a vulnerable population, its really an incredible exploitation, with no accountability.

    I think this is at the core of what happened to you in alot of ways, as a citizen we are a vulnerable population to our government, we can easily be exploited by them. You have done quite a good job at showing the myriad ways that exploitation can happen. There is not just one tool the government can use to take advantage of its citizens but a very wide array of perfectly effective things. I think you love examples of this and Fanon is an excellent one – i found it very interesting that during his time in Algeria, he reported that the French forces commandeered his ECT equipment in order to interrogate rebels. We know that if something is absolutely true then the inverse is also true, if governments want to commit crimes against other humans or its citizens it will actually do so overseas so it does not violate its own sovereignty and can more easily deny the sovereignty of other governments, furthermore the agents of our government that perform illegal activities are allowed to do so as long as they are not on our own soil. They have really perfected the game so well they know how, when and where to do whatever they want – which means if they need to do it on their own soil they certainly can do that as well. Maybe I am rambling a bit but I am really surprised by how well perfected the things going on around us are, at first i thought this may be a new thing or something that rarely happened, now i see the joke is on us and we never had access to justice in the first place.

    To answer your other question, in the US, the police have a tremendous amount of space to operate in during the course of their duties and are rarely if ever held personally accountable for their actions. So what does that mean? It means a law enforcement office can violate your constitutional rights by pointing a loaded weapon at you or coercing a statement from you or otherwise threatening you with virtually no accountability, certainly no personal accountability. The worst thing that can happen is that you could take legal(civil) action against the law enforcement organization whom that officer worked for and try and get some compensation but there is really no fair legal compensation for having your human rights trampled is there? I think you have identified that maybe our legal rights are only retrospective. We have these laws and ideas of how human beings should be treated but it is violated every second by people who know exactly what the law is. I mean its a hard job protecting a populace from itself but the legal system meant to keep things fair has completely and utterly failed, it appears, and there is little to no access to the means to rectify things legally. The law is so complicated you need a lawyer in order to get anything done, and as such there is no adequate access to lawyers, and no adequate time frame in which you could act even if you did have access to a lawyer.

    Everything is bogged down and controlled by bureaucracy and as such, like in your situation governments have eternity to ensnare you in the way that best fits their agenda, or deny you access to justice.

    I really hate dwelling on such things but its a very dangerous time to do a lot of things, like even get help in the medical system and any assurances we might have for honesty in that system or any other is really largely fiction.

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  • JanCarol –

    It is a very interesting phenomena, after having experienced it and have talked to hundreds of people about it I think I have it largely pegged.

    People are absolutely smitten with leveraging cognitive impairment to solve mental discomfort. Looking back as far as we can, people have always used alcohol, and then the next thing and the next thing. This fascination with electrical current and fields that interfere with or change cognition and or executive function will never stop as long as people keep trying to quell their own minds with some sort of physical intervention.

    When I experienced my own cognitive impairment as a result of TMS, I actually experienced cessation of my anxiety, but it was replaced with this void of difficulty thinking and expressing myself. As time passed on I started to get the ability to articulate what had happened and it was that the primary actor since the very first day of my TMS treatment was augmentation of my cognition by physical insult or force.

    There are a lot of philosophical questions that come up when we look at it plainly, and I think each person has to answer that philosophical question first before executing the scientific “answer” for themselves. The real rub has been that science has tried to convince us that we don’t have to ask ourselves if we want a physiological adjustment to our brains in order to get cessation of any unpleasantness, but its just not true. There is always the philosophical question of, do we want to harm ourselves in order to bring a chance of relief? I really loathe those who keep trying to convince everyone that it can be low risk or risk free, at least in a medical setting there is no such thing. Its just a sales pitch isn’t it?

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  • Gayle –

    Thank you very much indeed for deciding to respond here. The only information that I have about TMS causing heat inside the brain is two fold and also already illuminated here. There is expert testimony listed in this article about how ECT and the subsequent electrical current generates thermal energy inside the skull which causes heat damage to the brain, obviously the brain is incredibly sensitive to heat. The other is that we know electrical current and their corresponding fields create heat as a simple matter of course(physics) so it is inferred that there is no way TMS does not generate heat inside the skull because it induces electrical current inside the skull and the electrical field passes through the skull as well, so we know it is generating heat but how much was unknown. It likely does not have the thermal potential ECT has from direct exposure to outside current.

    That being said, It is incredibly hard to find documentation and evidence of what TMS does and how it interacts with the body, the stacks and stacks of studies I have read through are all devoid of any meaningful measures of electrical energy and or thermal energy generated or applied. It only speaks about the hertz which I am all but certain is because the scientists and professionals publishing these things are either censored for it or are well aware that measuring these types of forces can be directly related to the amount of harm the human body would be subject to. So, for you to find anything that even mentions heat transfer or build up is a really really important find. I could find nothing of the sort for the aforementioned reasons.

    I wish I had some additional information to offer on the subject but I do not at the moment but I will reach out to some friends of mine to see if I can come up with some resources for you, on heating brain tissue and specifically by way of electromagnetic fields.

    Thank you for this resource, I will share with with the group and anyone else I think it will help.

    lastly, I am very glad you have not experienced any harmful effects from TMS. All of us sharing all of our stories always helps me feel less alone, I am grateful for every one and all that we learn from them.

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  • Wonderful thoughts Diaphanous.

    I often linger on what complete destruction would look like as a result of the unwise paths we have taken but I cannot fathom it in reality – I know there will always be remnants of whatever happens. I realize I do not struggle with projecting the outcome but rather the recovery from that outcome. I am glad able to hear about it from others, thank you.

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  • Boans,

    It is good to hear from you. I hope you are as well as you can be and find some manner of peace.

    I really like your observations of Fanon, I was recently able to read some of his stuff and study his life a little. It was incredibly illuminating. I will admit i did not understand the honesty of colonialism until I read about his earlier life and the time he spent in Algeria during French occupation. I found it very interesting that the French took the ECT machines that were used for psychiatry there and used them to torture the rebels for information. I believe the works that I read were before Wretched of the Earth, I do have that book as well although i have not read it yet. His earlier woks shined quite an illuminating light on psychiatry. It is very interesting and powerful, what we learn from people who are fixated on simply telling the truth.

    After reading everything you wrote I do have some questions that occurred to me. When i look at the incredible suffering that many of us go through(and you certainly seem to be included in that), do you think these things were meant to be? That these events were predestined? I spent a lot of time and energy fighting for a way to see justice and trying to heal, however no matter my efforts they all seem to get thwarted, to such an extent that it seems to defy logic. I am wondering if you think we were meant for these circumstances which would mean that no matter our efforts we could not have prevented them and we cannot get out of our difficulties until they are meant to be lifted. At first I thought all of these circumstances in my case were the result of cause and effect, however lately I have begun to look at things in a different way – a way in which, where perhaps we no longer need to occupy ourself with the desire to try and rectify what happened or seek justice. This has been very helpful to me because like you, it seems we have both identified that the systems by which mankind has enacted around us make justice and these other concepts of fairness we have impossible to access.

    I think you outlined very well some very critical observations and wisdom about our current state of governance, which is true for both the US and Australia – and I am willing to guess the majority of governments in the modernized world. I think most of the people around us choose to ignore or are completely ignorant to the reality we are seeing. Its much easier for them to believe that the world actually functions in a free state when in reality people with power have robbed the people around them of their freedom by their selfish actions(and you are right its not just monetarily motivated, its motivated by self interest, hatred and many other factors – money just seems to be the most obvious, most rational and possibly most common I think). I actually learned what was happening innocently and unknowingly. When I was working at a huge corporation I noticed that they would change their bylaws and policies often be it HR, departmental or operational policies. At first i thought it was for better functionality or to enhance profit but then I noticed that some of them did not make sense. Some of them flagrantly slowed things down and did not serve a legal monetary or other logical purpose. It appeared that these changes served just the single function of stroking this particular departments ego. After even more time i realized that new execs would come in and just change all manner of things from big or small to be able to control everyone in whatever way they wanted, sometimes legal and many times illegally. Even HR would uphold illegal corporate rules and bylaws if the executive told them to do so, which is both illegal itself and unethical – furthermore should never be asked to be done by any human being ever. We should not ask of or require any person to do something that is wrong. However the environment had become so invasively evil and morally compromised not even staff members who were trained for many years to act ethically would even give it a second thought.

    I had always told myself well this is just one bad business, what i did not understand that that point was that this mentality had become completely endemic and had long since penetrated almost all levels of government, medicine, religion and large businesses.

    They rewrite the rules over and over again with any authority they can in order to derive a state of control. With this control they then execute their own will and anyone in a similarly suited place of power is able to do so as well. The rules are often written so accountability is ambiguous and impossible. Organizations and individual responsibility is all but impossible to identify or resolve. The organization is always the answer not the acts of the individuals executing their own interests. Much like organized crime, like Peter Gotzsche mentions in his book.

    I think what you have found here is that now anyone who is an individual is inferior to those serving a government or organization because what were once just laws are now rewritten over and over again so that they are now tools of oppression and injustice leveraged to keep the power of organizations and the ones who run them intact. It seems there is an infinite number of ways to control others but very few ways to honor freedom and peace.

    Thank you for mentioning Joanna’s paper, I have not read this one yet and I find it very interesting. You mentioned a perceived shortcoming of it. I think that’s fair. I think the Dr’s that write generally, and definitely the ones that are critical of psychiatry, are burdened by an obligation to speak objectively when they should feel free to write things that are articulated more philosophically. I think it takes an excellent balance of philosophy and objective thinking to get to the truth. We are both well aware of the fallacies evident in scientific observation and thought, like correlation not being causation and such. There are many false inferences in medical science in particular because they have no requirement to be philosophically correct and as such pharma capitalizes on that fact and falsifies things with that purpose. Another form of control and self interested manipulation of others. Just as cunning as changes in governmental control meant to imprison its citizens instead of serve them.

    I did see some of the hub bub about euthanasia in both New Zealand and Australia, i found it very interesting and a microcosm for how government is working and viewing things. Important observations can be made about the framework in which they are operating. I think these tings are important to understand. Again it seems maybe the best we can do is understand what is happening because the game is rigged against us as individuals and we are unable to get justice or fair treatment any longer, it appears our best efforts are to understand and circumvent any chance of dispute or harm that could result. Its an odd occurrence I have asked myself, where are you now? How do you look at things now compared to before you were injured and denied justice? I have become pretty extreme and yet maybe not at all, I take responsibility for every action I take medical or otherwise and I expect to take the full repercussions from those actions, I do not depend on anyone to help me if something unfair happens or I am harmed. This has been a huge shift from my mentality before TMS – I had thought i could rely on society and government for justice or help but I realized that was a big mistake. It appears that the self reliant ways of our ancestors was maybe the right way from the beginning. I used to think this way but i was slowly indoctrinated against it.

    I wonder what your thoughts are, i know i asked a few questions in there. Thank you for sharing as always and thank you for pointing me towards new resources, examples and occurrences that shed light on what is happening.

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  • markps2,

    I am very grateful you have not experienced suicidality as a feeling. If you never do, you likely have something to be unequivocally grateful for, for the rest of your life.

    What i have come to learn in the last few years is that all sensations can have both physiological and psychological causes. Up until i was injured by TMS, i had dealt with extreme psychological depression and anxiety at different times in my life but was free of serious physiological harms to my brain and nervous system. After my TMS injury i experienced extreme physiological depression which can also be expressed as fatigue or CFS by some, however the sensation encompassed my nervous system so entirely that while i had plenty of physical energy i could not muster the emotional or mental energy to do anything at all for long periods, i could not understand things, everything in my nervous system has been retarded to such a level my functioning was ultra low, including my emotional functioning which also participated or coexisted with a complete lack of emotion and emotional depression. You see if our nervous system experiences a physiological change so do we emotionally, they are inextricably intertwined. The same happened with anxiety. I had extreme panic attacks and anxiety at the drop of a hat from external stimuli, it felt entirely different that my past episodes of situational anxiety. These were generated from over stimulation to my nervous system because it was so under powered and incapable of processing more than one thing at once. If i was exposed to loud noise and a bright light at the same time, my brain would physiologically precipitate a panic attack. I remember quite clearly sitting in a friends dinning room while kids ran around yelling and other conversations and stimuli were going in every direction around me, my brain exploded and i could feel the endorphins and other hormones coursing through my head and body while i just sat there and stared out into space, my entire body exploded into a symphony of panic which was excruciating but was tied to emotion or thought based causality in no way. i just sat and experienced it. This was common at the time. It is in this same was you can experience suicidality which to date is the single most visceral and horrid thing i have experienced in my lifetime.

    Up until this year I had experienced a great deal of suicidal thoughts but never the feeling. Up till that point all my suicidality came as a result of feeling hopeless and dealing with an impossible feeling situation for year after year. There was always a situation or series of emotions that precipitated the thoughts. However that changed after my TMS injury developed and then changed itself. At the beginning of this year I changed my diet which i knew would involve going through a detox period that could provoke my brain injury further by adding toxicity to my brain and body, but i weighed the risk and proceeded in hopes my health would be much better in the long run. After a few week of the diet changes I was sitting in the quiet relaxing and I was suddenly completely overtaken with extreme feelings, the feelings were so extreme and the experience so visceral the only thing i experienced was suicidality, this was not a conscious thought about how and when or why i should end my life. It was a pure experience of feeling like my life should expire immediately, a feeling so inhuman and unpleasant the only way to describe it is suicidality, in my opinion it is the pure antithesis to existence. It is a feeling that is the complete polar, true opposite of joy and fulfillment – far beyond depression or anxiety. The only other way to describe it is internal akathisia. Are you familiar with Akathisia? I am willing to guess not, although I am genuinely interested in knowing – I had not experienced it myself until recently – I have discussed this exact phenomena with many people and everyone who has experienced akathisia, understood exactly what i was speaking of. You can also watch the youtube movie “Overpill” to get a good idea of what physical akathisia is, there are many other resources out there as well. In my experience, Internal akathisia is the same or similar manifestation without the external symptoms or expression.

    I will gladly admit that before i experienced it for myself i was almost ask skeptical as you are now, but i will tell you that there is absolutely no way to comprehend this experience until you feel it for yourself. It does exist and as I understand it now, it does not exist in any natural way except through traumatic brain injury either pharmacologically or otherwise physiologically induced.

    Yael – I am in incredible admiration of your bravery for writing this piece. You have described it so well, I really could not even offer any better description myself. I have experienced virtually every detail that you have described here as of late and it has completely changed my life – I had thought my initial TMS injury would be the hardest thing i ever had to deal with, and this is a cascading effect of it, but this is far harder to handle that the years of initial fallout.

    My experience has been so overwhelming and difficult I have been deathly afraid to mention it or write about it, in fear that just any extra cognition about it would in some way manifest it again. incredibly close friends of mine have discussed it with me in my darkest moments and I found out they referred to it as The horror or the darkness, and most of us related it to the experience of internal akathisia. I am curious your thoughts on that.

    Thank you for your bravery and bringing the light of truth to what are truly the deepest darkest corners of human existence. Reading this has strengthened me in some way, every person that understands – much like you have said – every person that truly understands help carry the burden. Pain shared is pain divided, Joy shared is Joy Multiplied.

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  • I am so glad you have the fortitude to stick with this and bring awareness and accountability to what is happening. It will take alot of us all over to do that unfortunately – ideally we shouldnt have to do anything for people to take us seriously and want to understand what happened but that doesnt seem to be where we are at, at this point in history.

    Very wise to wait and think on what to say, write and do. I have had to do that several times in critical situations since addressing my injury with others, its very difficult to do given our situation, my anger used to be so bad. It makes it really easy to ramble on about just how incredibly messed up this situation is, there are an unending number of parallels, correlations and incredible injustices tied into what we are going through.

    I think the single sample session would make a big difference in getting people to see the reality of TMS before committing to all those sessions, brilliant.

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  • LisaM,

    I am so sorry to hear that. I wish it was not so common and I really really wish there was appropriate informed consent for TMS. When we look at when electrical physicists were experimenting and documenting how these fields affected the human body it was back in the 60’s and 70’s. These exact harms have been known about for over 50 years, and this is just widely accepted published stuff, scientists knew about this stuff before that. To think that these device manufacturers and scientists developing and experimenting with this technology are unaware of the harms is absolutely false and unbelievable.

    I am so glad you had the presence of mind to seek out this knowledge and understand what is happening to you better. Thank you so much for sharing your incredibly important story here so we can all benefit from each other and feel less alone.

    The Facebook group is a great place to share and there are so many of us there now. While it is hard to read each and every one of these stories, it is so important we understand and share with each other in my mind.

    It took me a while to find a good neurologist but I did and at least I now have a Dr with an open mind and interest in figuring this out along with me. It is hard as many docs don’t believe us and can be very doltish but there are many of them out there with the desire and ability to really help us out.

    Hang in there.

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  • I think your feelings are entirely justified and your course of action even more so.

    Every single person I have spoken to harmed by TMS gets a PTSD type dynamic when trying to communicate with the TMS clinic that harmed them and then doctors in general. It is very hard to endure what we do and then get met with extreme criticism, skepticism, denial and gaslighting. I can imagine those feelings are all the more intense when you really built trust and even a work relationship with the people who ended up doing this to you.

    I am always amazed at how we are all treated with the same lack of accountability even given close relationships. One person recounted to me how she had worked as a nurse in a hospital for a very long time, maybe her whole career if i remember and she was put into an extreme state from TMS and could no longer work. When she went in to complete some disability forms they tried to involuntarily commit her, she had to throw herself through the door and run out to her vehicle . When she got home two sheriffs deputies were waiting for her. They did an assessment and inspected her home and since they could not see she was a harm to anyone or herself they let her go. This was motivated by the same hospital and staff she had worked for for years and the same ones that hurt her with TMS. In all honesty I would find these stories hard to believe if i did not hear them over and over again from completely independent sources.

    It is very important that these people at least know clearly what they are doing. One of the most frequent tragedies in my mind are when people are severely harmed but never say a word to the staff or anyone involved in the treatment, as this perpetuates things quite a lot. But I really do understand why they do it, absolutely no one wants to talk about these things and stand up to others when they are going through severe brain injury, its really quite unpleasant.

    Thank you for your conscience and efforts!

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  • Rain726,

    I am so glad you got some means of informed consent from these articles. Its very interesting how you experienced it in relation to concussion. It really does appear to be a TBI, concussion or some sort of intense brain injury based on what we are experiencing. Thank you for sharing that.

    I hate hearing how healthcare professionals do abandon us, but it is really consistent. Generally speaking they don’t understand or treat brain injuries proficiently and when it comes to TMS its even worse.

    I am so incredibly glad to hear you are better!!! I am also glad you feel driven to let people know about your experience. Please do so.

    I think the most important and profound impact we can have is by telling the people around us, in our closest and meaningful relationships what has happened and why. This can make a really big impact in our immediate community and is critically important so people stop getting injured at some fundamental social level, its really the only way currently we can be sure to get the word out and impact people.

    The other thing you can do is report the event to your state medical board, attorney general, and the FDA if your in the US. The FDA link is here –

    We cannot compel our governments to act but we can make a record of what happened to us so when the thousands of others end up reporting their harms the right people will be able to change things at that level as well.

    I hope you continue to improve, I am so sorry you had to experience this setback.

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  • Raina726,

    Thank you so much for the thoughtful reply.

    You have identified some critically important things for people to understand who are trying to navigate western medicine and psychiatry in particular.

    I think one of the most important things here is, and I have discussed this many times since my injury, is that the western medical model and science generally does not even consider individual biology. The biggest thing they may consider is varying weight or age among individuals, but this doesn’t even scratch the surface of the incredible diversity among all of us. As such, there is never a normal therapeutic dose of a drug or treatment that will apply evenly to everyone. A long time ago i noticed that medication effects vary wildly just based on what and how much i have eaten that day – not to mention how my biological make up is vastly different than anyone else taking the same medication. Doctors just simply do not take this into account much at all, if you are lucky you may find a good doctor who will listen to you, understand and make adjustments accordingly, but these doctors are very very few and far between. All the literature and research at their disposal also does not make any differentiation between patients and rarely records or shares the data that would be needed to see critical difference in patient populations. The longer I live, the more appalled I am at how incredibly negligent and ignorant this medical paradigm is to the critical details that could allow it work well. It is very very unfortunate that your TMS provider has this same blindpot, unfortunately they are not required to know anything at all about neurology so they would have no idea about how adversely this treatment could effect your brain and the rest of your central nervous system. The whole TMS proposition is completely inappropriate and imbalanced, the people administering the treatment have no background or basis for understanding the machines they are using or the effects they will have on their patients. You have displayed classic signs of neurological injury and yet they have no idea what is happening to you. In this way we are all anecdotes, as you have said, because they cant even comprehend what they are doing.

    Another very interesting detail that pops out to me more now than ever before is that you experience all these varying degrees and instances of neurological sensation and disruption. We know that electrical impulses always take the path of least resistance and that varies incredibly widely in the human body, in fact its likely in an organ like the brain to be different every single time. It appears that TMS almost randomly disrupts all sorts of different neurons causing chaos with all the sense. Although certain things are almost always the same, we all have emotional problems after – intense anger, severe ups and downs, emotional sensitivity or suggestibility – over sensitivity to external stimuli, changes in sensation, sight, hearing etc. Almost everyone gets tinnitus or worsening tinnitus. In this way it appears our network of neurons are rewired for us, but certainly not in a beneficial way, like the manufacturer or clinics claim. Recently i came upon a very good read – Rock Steady by Joey Remenyi, in it she outlines an approach to rewiring these connections to a more appropriate place using neuroplasticity. It talks a lot about how we perceive unwanted sensations and how that can inhibit neuroplasticity and healing, whereas if we reinterpret these things as just neural communication from your body, or your body just trying to communicate with you, you can hear your body and shift your focus to healing which will in tern direct your neurons to a new and desired function instead of the one artificially disrupted and changed by TMS. Very interesting stuff. I am sorry you experienced all this, I have much of it as well, But i am exceedingly glad my writings allowed you to catch the harm upfront so you have a better chance at recovery.

    Also, I noticed many of us who report serious harms identify as a kind of highly sensitive person or empathic personality type. I have always fell into that category as well, having what sounds like similar experiences with medications and the sort as well.

    I think these things should be reported as much as possible because very few of us have the courage to report on what happens, and understandably so, many times we are left in such a place where it can just be hard to function let alone figure out how, where and what to report.

    I recommend reporting to your state medical board, The FDA(below), your state attorney generals office, and also your insurance if they paid for it. Something to keep in mind is that it may be fraud if they financially benefit from your harm, especially when they did not provide the experienced they claimed. In this way, your insurance will not pay them for their services, or will tell them to return any payment because it could be illegal for them to keep it once they are notified of harm, especially if it is federal funds like those from Medicare.

    I hope you make a quick and full recovery, generally speaking there is an initial period where things seem the most intense but they begin to taper off and whatever harms are left begin to normalize. I hope you have none because you had so few sessions.


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  • David,

    I am incredibly sorry to hear about this. When it happens it is very hard for others to understand just how bad it is and how it feels.

    I also understand how cheated you feel when you didn’t need the treatment in particular in the first place. I only had a moderate depression that i was handling with exercise and healthy diet, but in my struggle i trusted the opinions of a few doctors who unfortunately had no idea what they were talking about. It is a very very unfortunate situation and just adds insult to injury.

    I agree on the meds, they havent proven to help anyone I have met so far in treating their symptoms, just like with other electrical injury. For me i focused on eating very very well, being as active as I could and studying up on how to handle brain injury or TBI. It turns our our injury is a TBI from electromagnetic fields. So reducing neuroinflammation could be the best approach to take for healing.

    Its very hard sometimes not to go back to the lies about TMS and try additional sessions, physics tell us this can only end badly but some people report feeling better after this “dip” but there is no medical or scientific basis for the dip or even TMS at all. Its likely to just increase injury and or create cognitive impairment so significant a person may not realize they are injured or may not experience the injury in an overt way that is detectable.

    Some people have recovered from just a single treatment in a rather short time, others it has been a longer road. Whatever you choose I wish you the best of luck. Trust yourself and hang in there.

    Steve – hahahah, I love it.

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  • Proceed cautiously, with an abundance of thoughtfulness, caution and scrutiny. Do everything you can to help yourself heal that has little or no chance of harm. Be very skeptical of any medical treatments and make sure you know the potential harms well.

    The nano pores are incredibly small and I know of no medical treatment to fix them. The only way i can conceive of would be by promoting cellular health and healing. In my mind the only way for the pores to resolve would be for the cells to heal themselves. These thoughts are just based on my experience and pursuit for answers.

    The damage is so small and diffuse it does not even show up on imaging, and could only be discovered on autopsy and possibly only with an exhaustive effort I would imagine.

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  • ahahahahahaha, It is very interesting how the further I look back in history the more I am able to see through the deceptions of current events, especially medical ones. Also, these older depictions and concerns shown through media are a lot more honest than what we see now.

    Almost everything now is dismissive and passive in nature. Its very very disturbing.

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  • This is incredibly interesting, I knew it was the rapidly alternating nature of the fields that made them so dangerous to human cells, but I did not understand that piece of it before you mentioned it. Thank you for that.

    I believe TMS was created back in ’85 by Anthony Baker, so its old but not too old. It has been used by the VA since about that time as well, but was not allowed to be marketed to the public in the US until 2008.

    I do agree with your analogy of fixing the wrist watch with a sledge hammer, which is also interesting to me because one of the first doctors that would admit TMS was dangerous said that TMS was like a little jackhammer working on the side of your skull.

    I certainly do think the practice of TMS on humans is criminal given what i have learn about the physics and also that the people that developed it knew exactly what they were doing to people when they created it. Anyone with a basic understanding of electrical physics and engineering would, and that knowledge would certainly be required to build these devices.

    A thought I cannot get over is how similar this is to ECT and ECT is so overtly barbaric… I cant help but think someone got the grand idea to create a wireless ECT device in order to overcome the stigma and more obvious nature of harm associated with it in an attempt to continue making money and destroying the cognition of those who have mental hardships in order to solve their problems.

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  • Steve,

    I am glad you had the good sense to discontinue treatment, a lot of us don’t.

    Things are really hard to judge after one treatment. For instance several people have been fine after anywhere to 2 to 8 weeks and returned to normal. Unfortunately there have been several people who were severely injured after a single treatment and have not been able to recover for a year or more now.

    That being said recovery is certainly possible after just a single treatment, and in that scenario you have the highest likelihood of recovery but you should proceed cautiously.

    MCS is very interesting, many people develop it after TMS and so it does not seem odd that yours got worse. I developed it in a more mild form after and it has seemed to calm down over the last couple years, but i still remain highly reactive to certain things, of which i never reacted to before TMS.

    With that being my experience, it seems reasonable that yours may resolve after some time and good care.

    The electroporation that TMS causes creates nanopores in our cells that allows outside substances to traverse cell walls more easily, this may be the reason for it.

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  • Thank you as always for the read Doc.

    I am glad to hear about what you’ve seen with this as well. It was pretty troubling after my injury to see that every single doctor I went to see would end up having a TMS flyer from the local clinic on their desk and when I asked about it, they all had reps who had stop by to market with them.

    Its even more troubling that they were short staffed at their office when I had my TMS done. To me its really apparent its a money grab, and i just cant get over the fact that they are able to significantly damage someones brain to that end. It just baffles me – Still.

    Hope you are well.

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  • Yes, please feel free to email me at [email protected].

    Life with little kids is pretty demanding, I get that, you have a big task just keeping things going I am sure.

    Depending on the severity, we have seen some improvements to eye function over time. Things like detached retina of course usually require a medical intervention I believe and don’t heal on their own.

    I do stick as well as I can to the routines, eating well and getting as much physical activity as I can. I think they really drive healing.

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  • I hope your EEG yields some valuable information, mine did not and I have not yet seen anyone’s who has. If yours does it would be very interesting. We have seen some pertinent information show on a QEEG.

    We have seen just a handful of people recover completely or virtually completely from serious TMS injury, unfortunately about half of those people only had 1 to 3 treatments. Generally speaking it appears that the best we can do is really minimize and cope with the impacts until they start to diminish over time. Certainly some people have managed to completely eliminate a certain side effect or a certain side effect resolved completely in a relatively short period of time while others persisted.

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  • Thank you for that Miranda, I should not have spoken so flippantly about the vaccine without pointing out that it is meant to act on the immune system, and rather since both the immune system and central nervous system have both upstream and downstream affects on one another it appears that there is a possibility of second hand consequences for people with neurological problems.

    Given the history of neurological harms and disorders generated by vaccines including Demyelinating CNS disorders and Guillain-Barre Syndrome it doesn’t seem like too much of a stretch to think there maybe direct causation as well, even though they are considered fairly rare. All these vaccines were intended to work on the immune system but it appears to be much more complex than that as anything that works on the immune system has the potential to cross the blood brain barrier and interact with the delicate structures of our CNS.

    There has been so little time to observe what is emerging and the causation of what has and will result. I really wish as much money, energy and attention that went into developing vaccines and medical treatments was also spent on trying to understand the potential harms and actual that occur after. To me that seems reasonable.

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  • This is very interesting for a few reasons. But, first let me say that it seems your experience highlights this really serious problem with the western/industrialized Medical model and that is, that it is so dangerous that the longer you are apart of it, the more likely you will end up harmed, over a long enough timeline it seems your are sure to be severely harmed.

    At first my assumptions about this kind of experience were limited to psychiatry but after reading Peter Gotzsche’s Dangerous Medicines and Organized Crime, I became very open to the possibility that it applied to our medical system as well – of which i have been validated in my suspicions, with a tremendous amount of evidence that I really wish was not as prolific as it as ended up being. If you haven’t picked up that book I highly recommend it, as well as any of Peter’s other books, including his new one on vaccines. Its excellent.

    I have been very skeptical of the covid vaccine based on my aforementioned research and experiences so it was interesting to watch the event around it unfold. I noticed some folks in my TMS harm group and others who experienced psychiatric harms from psych meds react in a relatively benign way at first… however as more of them took it, I noticed some very very severe reactions. What stood out to me most was that the majority of the reactions seemed to be a setback of sorts, many people who have already been harmed seemed to revert to a previous stage of more significant harm. Since both covid and the vaccine for it act on the nervous system and thats primarily the system that was harmed, it seems to either sensitize it again or agitate the components of the nervous system that are healing or were already harmed. I am very sorry you had to endure that as I saw some very very unpleasant things unfold for people that were already harmed and it was and is very hard to watch.

    As for the sexual side effects, I am sorry to hear that as well of course. However you are not alone, more than a few members of the TMS harm group have experienced a complete absence of libido following TMS. That is also pretty interesting considering the instances of PSSD or sexual dysfunction with both psychiatric drugs and finastride. I know with finastride the syndrome can cause irreversible physiological damage to the gentials which is horribly tragic. I hope you are able to heal from any impairment that has occurred from TMS. Based on principles of neuroplasticity if the only damage occurred in your brain and CNS it seems possible to make a recovery although it may not be quick.

    In the electrical injury community NORA rehab seems to be one of the avenues people have experienced the most success with and they seem a lot more knowledgeable on the relationship the eyes have to the CNS. You may want to check them out. Many of us have had vision issues, I have had more mild ones and they seem to have improved over time although i have spells of visual distortions, in the past I had them daily, now maybe every few months.

    In regards to what i said previously about the medical model, i find it more than a little humorous that we have to see functional neurologists and kind of fringe or unconventional specialists to have any hope at help. It seems they are the only ones who want to address the problem and not the symptoms. Pretty ironic really that they are the ones mainstream medicine looks down on.

    I am sorry the combination of ECT and TMS probably compounded any issues that were cropping up but i see that regularly in my group, DR’s that screw up one treatment want to escalate and use an even more dangerous one – in what world does that make sense? Its like they just keep going until your dead and/or cant complain anymore.

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  • Cory,

    Thank you for your comment. I am sorry you were injured in what sounds like Stanford’s new SAINT treatment. Let me know if I am wrong. I have been very disheartened to hear about it in the media lately and even on CBS Sunday Morning. They are painting it as a safer or more effective version of TMS, however without addressing the harms that result from the sheer physics of the treatment it is likely they will never be able to improve efficacy or safety.

    To answer your question, I have had some improvement to my emotional state which was absolutely horrible in the months following TMS. I also feel I have had some improvement to my fatigue and tinnitus at times. However under certain circumstances these things tend to revert to how they manifested originally. So, that leaves me primarily with cognition problems, dizziness, and DPDR that i really haven’t noticed much of an improvement in, and maybe some other things I am forgetting… I still have muscle fasiculations and twitches as well too, and serious sciatica. Initially my insomnia was pretty significant but that has largely resolved as well.

    It sounds like you are getting some good care, I know at least one other person who claims they improved their TMS injury from HBOT, but it was upwards of 40 to 80 treatments. It sounds promising.

    I have focused on building up healthy habits in order to heal over time and my doctors have agreed this is the best approach. I am working on an episode of my podcast now that covers this process I have been working on and my thoughts on the topic.

    If you are interested my podcast is called ‘Unshadowed Thought’ and it is available on Podbean, Youtube, Google Cast, and Audible as of right now.

    I should have this healing episode published within the next couple weeks.

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  • We can technically speaking we meet all the criteria and the evidence is there both experiential from victims and scientifically.

    However the problem lies with the will, it is a very complex and tedious endeavor legally. Also, after talking to what is around a hundred different lawyers, most of them are what appear to be the best in the country, none of them have the will or ethics to represent us yet. I was very surprised to find that was in desperately short supply.

    While myself and others who are in incredible pain and suffer a severe lack of energy and cognitive ability are entirely willing and able to get this done, a very large population of American injury lawyers could not say the same even though they appear perfectly able. I could elaborate for a very very long time but that speaks enough to why its not being done.

    We cannot find the legal help we need although virtually all the pieces are in place… which has taken a tremendous amount of energy and effort to put into place and of which no lawyer made any effort at all to help with.

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  • Very glad Sharing my experience has helped. It makes it all worth it.

    TMS is disturbing enough in and of itself, however most people I talk to about it are already in a very very compromised and difficult situation, then they are harmed additionally by TMS or are desperate to try anything and get a doc that suggests there is nothing to lose. This is an exponentially more troubling and risky situation and when it goes badly the grief and unpleasantness track right off the charts into tragedy.

    I am supremely happy you were able to be given the opportunity to make a fair judgement and avoid it – and that you are doing your best to advocate for your children.

    You would be surprised to find how many people who ended up severely and irreparably injured by psychiatry, just to find out later they had a bacterial infection or over growth, or even some other biological issue that could have been rather easily handled otherwise.

    That being said, in all pragmatic honesty, I have yet to find any value in or an argument for the use of psychiatry at all. The risk profile is exceptionally high and in my experience there has always been an alternative answer that treats the cause and not the symptoms.

    Thank you for advocating so strongly for your children.

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  • The sentiment is much appreciated SH.

    I have run across some great lawyers but they just aren’t able to help. I also know some really fantastic individuals helping as a public service but they are also in different areas or not able to take on something like this(The injury claim).

    The problem seems to be the Injury sector, not many operate there and the good ones I was able to find refuse to help because of the difficulty and capital it takes to really dig in on this type of case in an ethical way. The problem really ends up being is that there is a massive threat to public health but the FDA is entirely useless and it is far too difficult for injury lawyers to take the risks that would help instigate change. So in the meantime thousands of people are coming to great harm while the clock ticks away on the watches of people who refuse to act when they should because they don’t want to take a personal risk.

    I did not have a choice in the personal risk I took.

    Thanks again, for the comment, I hope you are well.

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  • wmr25,

    I am hanging in there, I have learned a lot about what happened to me and how I react to things now – So I have developed some good coping mechanisms and ways of life that help rather than hurt the situation. In that way things are better but if anything goes wrong i quickly remember just how bad things have been and can be now. I am very grateful that i have been able to figure things out and have been able to effect some improvement.

    Id love to have that conversation as well, I don’t ever get tired of having it with everyone i meet. Its so incredibly important and everyone has a unique perspective that is important to learn from. I think if we could all learn from each other readily these enormous problems would become small very quickly.

    Thank you for the prayers – they make a huge difference, there are no small voices in that way and every ones voice is critically important in every way they make it so.

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  • Howdy Boans,

    I hope you are as well as you can be.

    The lack of evidence perspective was particularly interesting as you said. I have run into similar mentalities and have noticed it in observance of myself. In the absence of anything observable, the void is likely filled with projection. An aggressive western state will project aggression just like a cheating spouse will accuse the other partner of cheating themselves. I have to admit i think this usually plays out if an entity is looking for something – likely power of some sort. A particularly unnerving dimension of humanity.

    Most of us see what we want to see. Those who can see reality are in the extreme minority.

    I think the difference may be character. I think those of us who quest to improve themselves and not others are likely to determine the true nature of reality. As we are really only able to understand the world through the lens of things we have observed and understood for ourselves. If we spend time reflecting on that it can be great, if not it will likely be very little. What are your thoughts?

    Psychiatric diagnosis and approaches focus so much on others and not the one making the diagnosis, it is rife with incredibly dangerous paradoxes and fallacies. Certainly the strike first mentality takes a strong hold. Self preservation should be a high priority when your poisoning and controlling someone else.

    The team B conclusions are very interesting, if you observe intelligence operations for long enough a pattern emerges and I am not sure its that difficult to understand that the aims are always the same and it can be fairly easy to see through, although others may tell us otherwise, hahaha.

    I have included some quality evidence below if your interested. I call it quality evidence not because i trust the sources, but because they match my lived experience and the hundreds of people i have now spoken to about this type of injury.

    Its all just a validation of the truth, and once you’ve seen it and felt it – you cant be fooled any longer. The lies are for those who weren’t there and don’t know what its like.

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  • JanCarol –

    I just reread this comment after quite some time and i just wanted to say that it turns out Havana Syndrome is virtually identical to TMS injury.

    A friend of mind send me a host of documents after reading my second article and seeing similarities. It turns out they could vary well be the same thing just with a different applicator or method but inherently the same damage is being caused. The injuries shared in released documents match TMS injury all but identically.

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  • mlwalton13 –

    Thank you so much for searching for answers, many people don’t and end up getting hurt because they trust blindly those who do not merit that trust. I know that caregiver roll can be quite hard. I am thankful beyond words to the family that has taken care of me, but i know it has been incredibly difficult for them, maybe even more difficult that it was on me.

    After harm from TMS, I have put my faith in the human bodies ability to heal itself. To that end I have endeavored to eat just all natural whole foods, exercise everyday, help my community and pursue the things i enjoy so that my mind and body may find healing. I think evolutionary this is how we were able to heal in the past. Its hard for me to believe we would have survived if that was not the case. It may be worth giving a shot.

    Best of luck to you as well.

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  • bbenditt,

    Not only is the list of people severely injured by TMS growing exponentially by the day, I am hearing from more and more people who have become overtly injured by their second round of TMS.

    This serves as a validation to the evidence of electrical injury because this is the same thing we see with ECT survivors. For the majority of ECT patients, reported benefits wear off somewhere around the 6 month mark on average, which gets them back looking at ECT to help them again, if there was some perceived benefit. This cycle repeats again six months or less after the next set of treatments. This is reverently referred to by the ECT harm community as the death spiral, where the repeated harms that were once not noticeable eventually stack up until the patients are severely injured or killed by the treatment. We are seeing the exact same thing with TMS.

    If you look at the physics of the treatment, it is virtually impossible to come out of TMS unharmed. You are exposed to hundreds if not thousands of times more electromagnetic energy than is safe for a human to be around, let alone directly applied to the brain. Feel free to read my follow up article outlining the applied physics and harms of the treatment That being the case, the only question is whether you can perceive the harms being done or not. Most people are spellbound by the cognitive impairment generated by TMS and mistake it for improvement, or the endocrine system simulates feelings of well being to try and offset the damage the body has undergone. Hence the very short efficacy time of treatment, the same you have admitted here in your own comments. If TMS worked so well, why are you back for more treatments so soon? Just like psychiatric medications, it is a revolving door. It can create the illusion of efficacy just long enough for you to think its successful, and then by suffering from delayed harms it is creating a revolving door where you run right back to it with the mistaken idea that it healed you when it actually harmed you.

    The therapeutic mechanism of TMS is unproven and undocumented, the only evidence out there is subjective and theoretical. However the mechanism of harms for this level of electrical and magnetic energy is well documented.

    It is also supremely offensive to say that TMS harms are incredibly rare and to suggest that the treatment should escape scrutiny for that reason. I have personally talked to hundreds of people whose lives are completely upended with constant misery and suffering, they are real and they are significant – far more significant in number and evidentiary finding than the people who have reported relief from it.

    Your praising TMS and Prozac when they are likely responsible for your predicament. On top of that I am not sure you conveyed an original thought on either one, but repeated drug and device company rhetoric to me here.

    Perhaps you should reevaluate your situation when looking for a solution? So far every single person i have met and spoken with had relatively small mental struggles, but after a few rounds of psych meds or other psychiatric treatment they are scrambling for anything that will help relieve the mental pain and suffering they are in. Good mental health is incompatible with pills and electricity and they will never be the answer in any form. They may distract or provide temporary relief but this is a slippery slope as the often forgotten small detail is that all medications are poison and all treatments cause harm. The object of the game is to cure a problem in exchange for a temporary harm but what medicine has orchestrated most typically is trading the harm for symptom relief and no cure, this is a losing game and most don’t realize the real harm they have done because it comes from a friendly face.

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  • Quite Right Sam, I am almost done with these Youtube videos and I am quite concerned about the hypothesizing going on and its lack of practical application and its lack of emphasis on patient safety.

    JanCarol – You are on it, I have a strong feeling this tech was used to inflict harm quite awhile ago, and the fact that we are hearing about it being used in this way now indicates its is being used very often and in a wide scope of operations, as in the past i am sure it did not make it into the media. I am sure it does not hurt the usage profile that it causes cognitive impairment and probably increases suggestibility while it is causing damages. Interesting side note, someone reached out and told me the DOD had gotten ahold of this and was working with it a long time ago, we know it was being utilized by the VA over 20 years ago, so you can imagine how and why that came to be. No real way to substantiate these things of course but what we do know of history certainly lends to the consideration that it may well be true.

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  • In recent months this theory has been brought to my attention. It is quite interesting, especially given the things i have seen and heard in relation to people who have been harmed by TMS. I have seen people so incredibly anxious after TMS that they no longer sleep and have developed POTS, which even led to heart failure, and this has lasted well beyond a year without any noticeable dissipation. I have also observed the opposite, patients so depressed and fatigued that they can no longer exercise, think, or even really get out of bed much or take care of themselves. They have even had tests come back showing serious impediment to their metabolism, also lasting years. This lends credibility to these hypotheses on the inhibitory and excitatory effects of TMS, and while this proves exciting for those looking to reverse the effects there are some serious objections that would have to be overcome. There is also the matter of the other symptoms that present as well, the neuromuscular problems, migraines, cognition problems etc. these all present along side the excitatory and inhibitory symptoms so they are a very large fly in the soup of this theory that this is even a static observable and repeatable feature of TMS, it could simply be a variable manifestation of harm being spread across different areas of the brain, which is largely random due to the huge water content and differences in density of brain matter across patient populations. We may see commonalities in the way treatment is applied but it does not mean that the inhibitory and excitatory effects are exclusive to this exact way TMS is applied, although I am sure many clever scientists would insist its true.

    The first is that all of these effects are subordinate to physics. Electromagnetic waves are inherently dangerous to the brain, body and its workings. The magnetic energy has been proven to be harmful especially at this intense level and rapidly alternating electrical fields of this magnitude have proven even more harmful. They inextricably cause irreversible electroporation at small levels of amperage and TMS is done at incredibly higher levels. If this procedure causes cell death, harms and dysregulates other cellular processes, there is no practical point in entertaining this as a treatment let alone a further application to reverse damages already done. It is guaranteed to do additional damages. While some may argue that this would be preferable under certain circumstances, like trading one set of symptom improvement for worsening others, i would argue that is a slippery slope and offers high risk with little to no chance of reward, is not a worthy course and violates the, now a days elusive, ‘Do no harm’ approach.

    Second, is the rational problem with TMS and the subsequent problem reversing problems generated by it with the same treatment. I have not found any evidence that TMS is even effective in treating depression, anxiety or any other human unpleasantness, so there is little reason to believe the ideas about inhibitory and excitatory effects. While this may be a controversial idea, its an evidence based one, there are no trials of good quality and size that are not funded by industry money that have shown TMS can be more effective placebo. Furthermore I have only met one or two persons who said TMS helped them and they had no side effects, out of hundreds of others who have had no help or have been harmed, so my known pool of experiential evidence tells me the same. The therapeutic mechanism of TMS is also unknown, no one can directly explain how TMS effects patients favorably for any given condition. So, while scientists and medical professionals present their own brand of evidence that TMS can have this inhibitory or excitatory effect on the brain, it is hardly reliable and has not been proven in an objectively provable way, along with any other aspect of TMS.

    In conclusion, what we do know is that fundamental physics tell us TMS does damage to the brain and CNS, also that we know very little about the brain generally speaking, and claims about TMS are highly unreliable because TMS scientists are poorly informed and interested in furthering their own work and not patient outcomes. Given all these facts, the claims we are looking at are likely not true, outcomes have a high level of uncertainty and a higher likelihood of failure or further injury.

    I really do get the draw of this fanciful idea that medical science is so advanced we can whip up some invisible fields and cure any unpleasantness in our lives. However it is a dangerous draw not because we humans aren’t brilliant or because we have not made large strides in treating acute trauma, but moreover because the brain and CNS are so incredibly complex and as such we are far too arrogant and intent on profiteering in our endeavors to create safe and effective medical interventions to them. To put it another way the more I learn, the less I believe in the simplicity of the claims of simply exciting certain parts of the brain or inhibiting others(I have seen opposite reactions in both cases), I think that is a really huge oversimplification of what is happening, it could be an observed generalization but its really not a fair description of what is actually taking place, just because people undergoing physiological harm to their brain can generally only be in an anxious or depressed state, doesn’t mean that TMS can accurately cause an excitatory or inhibitory effect and as such I am highly skeptical any problems could be rectified in that way.

    I see these Youtube videos are fairly long, I will make some time to take a look soon. Thank you very much for sharing this information, the more we learn the better off we are and I especially am always learning more about these topics every day. If I have any additional thoughts change based on the videos I will respond again.

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  • Fantastic piece Miranda!

    I do hope these issues get moved to the forefront of our culture instead of the talent itself. The talent must be secondary to how we handle and utilize it in the first place. It may seem counterintuitive but we have put the cart before the horse. It’s a shame that this issue has to be blown up in this context for most people to even understand it exists as well.

    Thank you for the deep dive, I learned so much.

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  • okboomer,

    Excellent question. After consulting with counsel, we found out that I had signed documents when I was terminated that relinquished most of my rights to legal action in order to get some compensation for them letting me go. Counsel still offered to take the case, but said it would be extremely emotionally draining and take a year or more, and I would only get a very small amount of compensation, maybe a month or two’s salary. I asked if I was entitled to Punitive damages because it was an ADA claim and they said yes, but judges just do not grant those damages, they always refuse them.

    When I aggregated all these factors, including being within the first year of my TMS injury and trying to figure out how I would keep myself alive in the coming months, i decided not to pursue it even though it was still a very hard decision. Another part of that decision was that i wanted to spend any time I could pursuing legal action against the manufacturer, which I have. I determined at that time I would much rather pursue something that benefits others in the long run, with the manufacturer suit.

    I faced another stark reality, abuses by employers against disabled persons happens very very commonly and even if disabled persons take legal action they are granted very little compensation. Counsel also advised me that she had spent significant time litigating the company I worked for in the past and that it was very clear it would be a protracted battle as they spend as much time and money needed trying to muscle out anyone that makes a claim against them, and its very arduous for opposing counsel. I will give my counsel credit for that, she offered to go after them simply for the fight and without the chance of any real profit, that was her thing and I think it was quite cool.

    Pretty sad to acknowledge the reality that Large corporations spend exorbitant amounts of money trying to avoid compensating wrongful termination and ADA claims against them, pretty savage. Far more money than they would pay out in the claims to disabled and disenfranchised individuals.

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  • Howdy Boans,

    I hope you are as well as you can be.

    I did not know you spent time in the arctic.

    I am glad i can help provide some validation in the area. I plan to keep writing about it. I have found it of profound importance that people begin to understand exactly how it works and the state of the legal system and those that participate in it. There seems to be a really large amount of misconception about it and even more misplaced confidence. I did not find it hard to learn about or understand these things, but yet everywhere I look people are seriously misunderstanding it. I think Media has a hand in that, as with everything else it seems, people begin to latch on to and form ideas of what our legal system is like based on the news and dramatic representations and reality is really stranger than the fiction we read and see on it.

    I remember the details and information you gave me quite awhile ago, and set out to either disprove them or validate them – along with what i had heard form many others, and this is where I have landed.

    It seems the legal system is another mechanism that can be paid for to do terrible things and in contrast has to be paid for to do the right thing as well and if you don’t have the money up front, you cannot afford justice or fair treatment. In your situation, those with control, motive and means could fairly easy torture and control you with no repercussions, I don’t really see my situation as being fundamentally much different, I just wasn’t trying to be controlled, I was just a bystander in the way of profits, and once they profited from my harm(the definition of fraud in the US) I had no recourse for justice or compensation.

    I will gladly keep you informed, I am still gathering my thoughts and the details of how it plays out but I plan on allowing our community to be able to learn everything they can from my efforts.

    – Also, I have found it very interesting how closely our treatment resembles torture under the statute you mentioned and also the UN definition as well. I recently cited the UN definition of torture when i wrote to several parties about the Court ordered ECT of Charles Helmer. While I do think the likelihood of any action against such crimes(that appear to be an everyday occurrence now) is not good, the argument does have perfect merit, and as such SHOULD give pause to any perpetrator who chooses to hide behind psychiatry, the DSM or any other system that enables these types of treatments.

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  • [email protected],

    Thank you so much for sharing all your thoughts on this topic. I do not think the incredible importance of it can be denied or ignored.

    I appreciate your perspective and the details you enumerated for me. I have been working this particular problem for a very very long time now and had already come up against and had to learn about the issues you brought up, and those really were the hurdles I had to work through in order to get someone to take my case. I really thought that if I overcame all these obstacles that were thrown in front of us, it would end in some kind of win, meaning someone would actually take our cases collectively(although I do not think it will be a class action as the symptom set varies too much and don’t fit the very strict standard set fourth in the historical class action reforms, so it will probably be a kind of MDL litigation with each claimant bringing their own case particulars in different localities that are most advantageous for them) or at least one of the really simple and virulent cases with video evidence and other damning documentation. What I found however was something really different that I expected, I found that the problem was an ethical one not an evidential one or even a legal one – the case is there, its relatively simple overt and easy to prove. Its all been laid out and virtually all the necessary parties have been discovered, engaged and involved in a greater conversation about bringing the case. However, getting a lawyer or legal team to act strictly on the ethical basis of bringing a claim that needs to be brought because it is in accordance with the law and represents severe damages to individuals and a significant threat to our communities has proven to be impossible. The entities I contacted all refused to take the required monetary and reputational risk associated with the claim, although they would gladly take it with well established case types, and they were swimming in monetary liquidity. There are so many people in the legal community that present themselves as ethical, purposed, community protectors that do all this good to keep justice in balance and the fact is that is a very hard claim to bring when it is rarely done with any kind of risk. A good act has no merits if it is strictly self interested or there is no evidence to the contrary.

    I have spoken to countless of the most prestigious firms in the US and I specifically sought out the ones who seemed to have acted with the most virtue and they all displayed a tremendous amount of self interest, even and especially when I was able to overcome all of their objections to the case. Their rebuttals and actions revealed a tremendous amount about how and why they operate which has perpetrated the failure to bring justice to thousands of horrifically harmed people. The failure is an ethical one, not a functional one which unfortunately has brought validity to the general disdain for the profession, of which is so supremely ironic i cannot even begin to illuminate it here – as this seems to be the same type of disdain people have for big Pharma and other higher systemic abuses. Whether it is negligent or willful is really the only thing that seems to pique my interest at this point.

    As a point of interest, as I engage someone in the legal profession(injury law?), I would have to implore you to closely scrutinize the actions of yourself and your professional company. What is the motivation for your actions? Are they in the best interest of others and monetary profit is the byproduct of appropriate action or is it the other way around? Arguably, the latter is responsible for the manipulations and abuses of corporations and government to people everywhere of which leads to the physiological harm of so many in the US.

    Id like to thank you again for bringing these issues up because everything you have mentioned is of paramount importance in a case that is already well established and is eligible to be taken by a legal professional, and not many people are having this conversation, so it takes courage to do so. If this had been earlier in my journey they would have been very eye opening and valuable but in any case will offer as much to others that walk this path in the future.

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  • Fantastic piece Rose.

    I am really glad to see someone writing about this topic and starting to address some of the very real systemic problems that are harboring and furthering our injuries.

    Where is the accountability, impartiality, and ethics of the professionals that handle some of the most sensitive and important problems of our time? How and why are these people allowed to maintain their practices after being indoctrinated by paper mill educations and mistreating their patients?

    Malpractice is all but impossible to get rolling in these situations and many of these Dr’s have pending lawsuits and grievances with the medical board and they are still practicing… not to mention these claims that make it to court or are actually sent to the medical board are just a very very small fraction of the real fraud, negligence, and willful harms being perpetrated.

    The more we discuss the better equipped we are to fight and this discussion is paramount.

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  • DCROY9633,

    So glad I could help. Forewarned IS fore-armed, very well put.

    Incredibly sorry to hear about your experience with ECT, and the subsequent misadventures. I really learned so much about what happened to me by observing and engaging the ECT survivor community. It’s more than intriguing how many similarities there are. This is the first time someone has told me that they go blank with the slightest bit of stress(I think its common we just don’t talk about it much). That is a very major component of my struggles, when emotions are high and i am suddenly under a lot of stress, I lose virtually all cognitive function.

    I am glad you were able to live independently, I am curious if you feel you have progressively been able to heal despite still having issues? That’s a big question for a lot of us that are new to this, we are struggling to figure out if we will improve or not.

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  • And what about the 8 dropouts Sam? After all my experience with folks who have been harmed by TMS, a lot of them have a very severe reaction after the first treatment. I would assume those folks had some sort of injury. Some of them don’t recover from just the harm of a single treatment as well.

    It is really a serious injustice that dropouts are not evaluated or considered for injury resulting from the treatment. It really is a massive cheat.

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  • Slacker – wow, I cant thank you enough for coming back and giving an update. It takes an incredible amount of integrity to do that, I deeply appreciate it.

    The first thing that jumps out to me, is your statement about being young and dumb or less wise than myself – you gotta cut yourself some slack, slacker. You were not warned about the long term effects and you did what your Dr’s advised you, you fell for the same trick I did with TMS, that just makes you human, your in an incredibly hard spot and to me it sounds like you made the best decision you could. I have to say, i am pretty convinced that you are smarter than me, you at least were on here looking up side effects, when my brain got fried, I didnt even know what MiA was or how to find adverse effects by going to the right places online, so I think your not giving yourself enough credit. And – lol – you filed complaints with all the right agencies, thats brilliant I didnt figure that out for over a year after my treatment, and at any younger age and experience level, i doubt it would have ever occured.

    Also, the burden, shame and guilt lands squarely on the physicians that execute these treatments. They are extremely well trained professionals that know exactly what they are doing, how and why. You should place no negativity on yourself, but i realize you may, just like i have and just like everyone else i have spoken to about their TMS injury. Even when someone was perfectly duped with no hope to turn away, they will blame themselves, maybe strictly because at the end of the day we are the ones left holding the bad – The physicians flee and deny all responsibility as histories greatest cowards. I have learned to let go of the self blame, i hope you can too, your way to Rad not to.

    This ECT game is really sick, it essentially goes against the UN convention against torture. i have to admit the harrowing details you shared with me have not left my mind for any of my waking hours, since i read your post. In what space is it possible we are torturing our children with this treatment!? There is no way, there is no chance in Hell, that child has any idea of what he is/was going to happen to him. Furthermore there is no circumstance that could justify that procedure and certainly not at his age. Words do not do justice to the depths of this atrocity against the human body.

    I am deeply sorry to hear you are having Memory loss and PTSD, coincidentally, i dont talk about it much, but i developed PTSD as well from TMS, it is my thought that it is a physiological PTSD as certain stimuli cause complete panic in me, and i think I am being overstimulated by my environment or stress and my brain can no longer physically pass these significant signals in its current state. I hope these prove to be temporary for you, I have heard from some folks that have undergone smaller amounts of ECT, that some of it comes back.

    There is this looking glass effect that I keep seeing. People who have not experienced significant injury from a medical or psychiatric procedure look at and explore the testimony of people who have been hurt and they just cant comprehend it. They go ahead with the treatment anyways, and they haven’t fully grasped the experiential depth of having a seriously damaged body or nervous system. In all fairness it takes a very powerful imagination to be able to get it. Its like the inability to understand is a magnet and it pulls certain people through, it begs to introduce them to a new reality. Its very odd to me, but i see it quite frequently and I do not think you are one of those folks at all, it was just a curiosity I thought i would share given the context of this conversation.

    That being said, once your on the other side of the looking glass no matter how you got here, you are now apart of a companionship of those who have had their eyes opened. There is no more possibility for you of the existence of a perfect or honest psychiatry or HCP. You have lived experience that tells you the real story. All of us on this side salvage what we can of our lives and then decide if we embrace the truth shown to us or not. Before my injury i was a corporate wanker, like an extreme corporate dude, everything revolved around my job and what i needed to accomplish. The rest of the world, really did not even exist, just my corner of it. Now, however I cannot lie to myself anymore and say everything is OK out there. There is a very large world out there and things are going very very wrong. Its a bit of a Blue Pill, Red Pill thing. I am extremely disturbed and upset about what happened to you and what you saw. In a kind of sick and twisted way though, I am thankful one more persons eyes were opened.

    As a closing thought – How problematic is our existence as a society if the only way we learn something is harmful is by making a large amount of people experience it? I find this whole process so incredibly reckless, every day i am baffled by it.

    I hope you are as well as you can be. If you need any resources on ECT or ways to rehab Sarah has a great site and I am always glad to look into anything i can as well.

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  • Thank you so much for the kind words, much appreciated.

    Dr. Breggin is so brilliant in so many different ways. I find it particularly cool how he emphasizes the effects of all this one children because they are the long term representations of what we are doing to ourselves, they are so incredibly important.

    I have always seen High School as the most difficult and influential part of my past. It really came to define my struggles and who I turned out to be. I understand that situation!

    Possibly the most important bit of wisdom I have discovered on this journey is that there is almost always a physiological reason for the distress. I have run into so many people that have suffered so greatly only to find out may years later that it was a physiological problem all along. Many times diet or some sort of exposure that needs to be healed from. I have seen quite a few people try the Candida diet(I prefer ‘The Candida Cure’) and find healing there. Personal and relational stress is another big one but if can be addressed and removed healing can begin.

    Hang in there and be thankful to yourself for advocating for your daughter, that’s so outstanding.

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  • gsgrace,

    I am so glad you brought this up since i had not heard of it yet. Ironically I have had quite a few of these types of treatments brought up to me that i have never heard of. This is not the same as TMS, although it seems similar to it in the kind of technology it uses. It looks like it uses electromagnetic waves to agitate cells.

    After looking into it just briefly, I see even the manufacturer is saying it uses ‘electric wavesforms’ to effect the brain. So what do we know about that?

    We know that electricity has never shown to benefit CNS function in any way and in any study… well that’s a pretty big statement, how can i make that? The mechanism of action is not even known for ANY of these treatments, if scientists don’t know how it works they cannot say it is healthy or has some therapeutic effect. What do we know? We do know for a fact that electricity and electromagnetic waves cause serious damage to the human brain and nervous system through electroporation, heat and other disruptive means. So we know that this treatment is most likely a con just like the others. The manufacturer has provided no evidence of real therapeutic effect, but we have seen this kind of language before that has roped good intentioned people into trusting a product only to become severely harmed by it, with no chance of ever having benefited.

    It looks like with this one, best case scenario it is not as harmful as ECT or TMS, at worst it could offer unknown serious harms, especially delayed onset ones. Some of these treatments seem effectual because the harm is actually stimulating an endocrine response which makes you feel dazed or in a state of shock that some people mistake for feeling better, but actually its just a natural masked response to trauma.

    I am very sorry to hear about your daughter. It seems we are indoctrinated these days by NAMI and so many other organizations that unpleasant mental states require a medical or chemical fix so we can be normal, of which is a complete and total lie. We are not meant to ever feel normal, we are meant to respond to our environment and, extreme stress, anxiety and depressive feelings are a response to serious things going on around us, and these responses help keep us safe. It seems to be very popular to dole out bipolar diagnoses’ for anything and also for labeling the side effects of medications as a mental disorder, when in fact it is a physiological response to having neurotoxins in our system. Bob’s book, anatomy of an epidemic really put together what had been brewing in my subconscious for so long on this topic. The evidence is just astounding.

    Medical doctors should be held to a high standard and be men of science, so you are right to be very skeptical. Many of them now a days just mascaraed as such but do not have any kind of practice based on science or medicine, they just prescribe and prescribe again until patients leave or become so subdued they do not complain of their side effects. Stand up for yourself and your daughter, regardless of her age, I am sure it is one thing you will never regret. We have all been put into very precarious situations with this topic and must help each other as much as possible to try and discern the truth of it.

    Best of luck, I hope this was helpful.

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  • I completely agree Miranda, and I am so thankful you are actively watching what is happening. I am getting people severely harmed every day. If you have any ideas on who i can reach out to let me know.

    I already reached out to the FDA and they did an investigation but clearly it did not yield any actions and they did not notify me of the results. Apparently i need to file another FOIA to see what they found. Its not really important though because their investigations just mean that they go to the facility and make sure they are doing everything correctly and safely.

    Consider this, the FDA does not even know how TMS works, they have no roll in the matter. They simply get an explanation of the device and trials from the manufacturer and approve it based on that. There is no condition of understanding anything to do with the mechanism of action or the results or anything of the sort. We both know that all this paperwork and data are easily manipulated for approval, but in all honest do they even need to manipulate anything if the FDA doesn’t even understand or doesn’t want to know how it works and what it does to the human body? The whole thing is out of sorts, I read articles about how dangerous electromagnetic waves of this intensity are to the human body but these salesmen for TMS say its a magnetic wave and perform all sorts of deception to make it sound harmless. This is a HUGE problem but no one is listening. I have contemplated my next step… I could send letters to the DOJ and other places but obviously I don’t really have any evidence that it will be taken seriously… I just listened to the podcast about the Ghostwritten paper 342, or whatever that Peter Simons wrote and narrated and there was a senator in there that seemed very interested in investigating these types of things, but I feel very lacking in the specific knowledge of how to bring attention to this type of thing. I certainly have found that making general inquiries to large institutions is very ineffective, the AG of my state just sent a letter saying they are rerouting my complaint after 2 years… I brought up a very concerning imminent threat to public health and that’s the response I got.

    I continue to flounder but I am happy to do what I can everyday in full awareness that it will take a tribe to address these dangers in any real way. I see the great struggles of others harmed by so many other things as well and I cant hope to fair any better. On a deep level though, I am very concerned that this is a NEW treatment and a NEW wave of trickery and danger that is set to injure untold millions of our community, of which the nature of the delayed onset of symptoms will make an impact for many many generations to come.

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  • Comancho7,

    I really appreciate you sharing a bit of your story here. You nailed and captured a lot of elements to this story that need to be told an emphasized.

    I am not sure people are understanding exactly what happening here and how serious it is. TMS is blasting the executive function are of our brains and everything after is screwed up and disoriented in so many ways. It is scrambling our brains and people are so hurt and confused afterwards they have a hard time figuring out what the hell happened to them. I think its possible the most dangerous type of harm is the harm you never knew happened.

    I have managed to learn a a lot and there is so much i couldn’t even get anywhere close with this article, however the most important concepts are in here. I will reach out for specifics on email.

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  • Megan,

    I love the article, being a former professional(not medical) I identified a tremendous amount with your previous articles as well on what to stop saying at work. Here you have identified so many things that, I , myself have come to realize as well. Being that we came to the same conclusions independently is powerful.

    Something is really really wrong with this casual mental health term and the gentrification of it so that it can be used to funnel others into psychiatry. I noticed this awhile back and it made me really upset, I think i started to put words to it when I read about NAMI’s role in psychiatry when i read Anatomy.

    Its my own thought, that more closely tied communities could naturally overcome the problem but that’s such a huge ask. No one takes responsibility for each other anymore, everyone just accepts that there is nothing they can do when a loved one or friend is harmed. They are taught that you should remain calm and just be there for them, instead of holding others completely and thoroughly accountable for the harms inflicted on them.

    I also think critical introspection has been unwittingly vilified by a lot of people because it can cause anxiety and depression. However, i contend that the anxiety and depression are a nature survival response to an environmental threat, and very healthy in that respect… probably a product of long years of evolution. However, when we are taught to not be critically introspective and just listen to others or take a Drs word for it, we are being trained to be a passenger to the powers that be. This is quite possibly the objective of almost every leader out there, corporate or otherwise. But it also enables psychiatry and all sorts of other harms.

    Sometimes I am curious why I rarely hear others telling friends or loved ones to think critically for themselves, to figure out and learn what is best for them. I assume they are afraid of what that might mean, but that fear is driving the real harm being done. I see trusting each other and committing to each others wellbeing as a paramount paradigm shift in this conversation. There are many other things that ‘could’ occur but I am concerned about the lasting viability of those options without fundamental changes in our communities and expectations of self.

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  • Interesting,

    I have had a few people close to me convinced that they had Asperger’s but it was not true, I think the vagueness of the symptomology can draw in a lot of false diagnoses. Just a side not to be aware of, of course you should assess your situation very carefully either way. That piqued my interest.

    It is a really good trait to be incredibly weary and skeptical of medical treatments. I learned too late unfortunately that the patient is typically the only one looking out for the patient. So, you have to be a very strong advocate for yourself and your loved ones. You husband is very lucky to have you in that respect. I was very much a follower and trusting to those I thought were just trying to help me out. I always maintained a very good relationship with the professionals that treated me, it didn’t end up doing me any good with TMS.

    This desperation for relief is what got me and others into trouble. I have found that for myself and so many others this is actually an indicator that there is an underlying factor aggravating the situation that needs to be addressed. An overly stressful job or expectations being put on the person that are unrealistic, something of that nature, these obstacles need to be overcome before a good decision can be made. Typically when you do that the cause of the issues may be made clearer and can be addressed without this kind of treatment, as well. I found for myself, just allowing myself to be human and not live up to the expectations of others, solved a lot of my problems. The larger outside world seems to have given up all efforts to treat people, like people. So, we end up being responsible for doing that for ourselves. I was late to that party.

    Best of luck, I hope maybe if he was able to read this article he may better understand the real dangers, I have talked to so many people in the VA that claimed they were harmed by this treatment as well. They have been doing it for over 20 years and I am certainly not convinced it was a good thing.

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  • Snowyowl,

    You continue to be so complimentary, I appreciate your kindness so much.

    Thank you for that link, while I am working hard to learn about TMS and psychiatric harms, I find at times there is so much history and activity I am unaware of, which may work to my detriment because I am trying to leverage as much as I can.

    Its my thought that community or tribe is the answer to the problems we are facing, I read a really excellent book called Tribe by Sebastian Junger. This book was not the genesis of my thoughts but it was the expression of conscious and subconscious ideas I had on the subject. It coalesced everything I had been trying to for a long time. For that reason, I have found myself trying to live that value I want to see in our greater community. What I found is that MiA is a manifestation of that same idea whether it was by intent or providence, I do not know. That being said, if we don’t stick together and make something out of these ideas we will continue to fail each other in the same old ways. I find it very interesting that our adversary’s only leverage against us is money really and they are able to somehow defeat reason and all human intuition by leveraging it. I think if it were not for the complete disintegration of our larger communities by technology, media, corporations and corporate rights over the rights of individuals(specifically in the workplace), and big government this may not be occurring. The knowledge of such a tragedy is a good motivator for me.

    I think its very interesting that you bring up surveillance and big tech, because I was in big tech… in a way and so I have seen first hand how information and dissention is suppressed. Execs and senior leadership continually reorg and move dissenters and everyone really so they cannot dissent or even grow an in depth knowledge of important operations, or the ‘greater picture’ which could also be termed ‘the greater crimes’ against out fellow tribemates. You could liken this too compartmentalization you see in the military. Everything important is partitioned and constantly moved around so leadership retains control. For instance I was an analyst and I noticed the data and reports i was feeding up to my execs did not paint a pretty picture about how this company was doing business… When i happened to see an executive presentation deck for other lines of business or others who needed to be in the know, maybe finance and compliance… i noticed the numbers i had provided were massaged, and or changed to appear much more pleasant than they were, and essentially tell a different story… See any parallels? Maybe to clinical studies for psychotropic meds, medical devices, or anything else that needs a stamp from the FDA? By the time i start to gather the details and figure out what is going on, one of two things has already happened. I was reorged into another area of the company OR i was assigned to another project and everything i was doing before is handed off to another team. The incredibly dramatic icing on the cake here is that my new boss is extremely unpleasant and adds incredible stress onto an already overworked individual … and doesnt care if i have to take time off because he just screws up someone elses professional life by handing off my work to them and asking them to figure it out, when that task alone is almost impossible. As a small side note… In this scenario I can only take so much time off work before the private disability company paying me to take time off requires i am on psychiatric meds in order for me to continue to get paid… this was an extremely offensive injustice i did not think was even a real thing… but again corporate rights over the rights of the individual, as if i decline the psychiatric drugs because that should be illegal, i not longer get paid.

    Does that paint a picture? are we starting to see the different levels of control that have been implemented into the workforce – Intel, Tech, and anywhere else? This doesn’t even include a host of other legal pressures that they use as back up leverage if anyone in leadership gets froggy. Leadership gets the last say, leadership gets the control… and guess what… leadership has their interests, they have a bias and they have interests and agendas, you could even say that’s senior leaderships sole function… and I have yet to see one that benefits the tribe and not their own pocketbook, and I don’t say that arbitrarily, I have known and spent time with high level execs.

    The person that stands up, stands up alone, which is the problem isn’t it.

    I hope this further illuminates the excellent track you are exploring, because you are right exactly right and there is overwhelming evidence of it, we just need access to it, its right under all our noses. Peter Gotzsche talks about this quite accurately in ‘Dangerous Medicines and Organized Crime’ – I understood instantly all the things he was talking about because I witnessed them in action for long years. Everything he claims is exactly true, to the letter and it is happening right now. One of my Dr’s told me the book was dated… if it was not for my kinder side I may have had a choice words or two for him. The tricks of pharma and device companies are hiding in plain sight, along with every other corporate exploitation of our communities. All we have to do is dig in and take them on, but when we do we must have an alternative to the modus operandi.

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  • Glad you’ve also heard good things about it. I’ve had excellent results in fact, might have given me what I needed to avoid perishing from this whole cluster.

    I have heard mixed things about the neturopathy, but I am curious about the orthomolecular medicine, I will look it up. If you have good results I would love to hear about it.

    Also- I remember falling for the nocebo trick. What i remember most is how i blamed myself for it as well. I thought, I keep getting harmed from these meds, it must be because I am so worried about getting harmed I am manifesting it for myself – just like the doc said. It took all this pain and suffering to get my eyes wide enough to see what was really happening. And, now that they are open i can see how difficult it is for others to get onboard, you literally have to fight every Dr. or other professional you see just about. I have to tell my Dr. what is what, piss him off, and be prepared to walk out ever time I see one. This is not something anyone wants to do, and yet is completely necessary to avoid death and injury.

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  • Its funny you brought up the convenience factor, that really seems to be where its headed… Why trouble yourself with a whole inpatient trip for ECT when we can easily zippy zap you in under 20 minutes, and with a minimally trained staff! My GP originally told me about it, and that was his pitch, He told me how easy and harmless it was, and then at the end he said in the not too distant future every Dr’s office will have one so if their patients are suffering from depression they just sit in the chair and get the ole zippy zap and they are good to go! Wow, doc, sign me up!

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  • Thank you Alicia, I am really grateful to still be able to figure this stuff out. So many of us just aren’t able to contribute in the way they would like. Thank you also, for your encouragement and advice, it is greatly appreciated.

    I really hope/wish there was some way to help some of the impacts TMS is having on others and our communities but I have not been able to find any, I haven’t really even found anyone that thinks this is a real injury or that it causes harm.

    I will give those supplements a shot, thank you so much for sharing that as well. I hope you have a speedy and full recovery.

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  • My pleasure Stuart,

    I hope that this offers some sort of knowledgebase and understanding for a real informed consent, for the treatment.

    Its funny you mentioned that point about the fields, that was actually my kind of epiphany moment when I had been reading about ECT and seeing the similarities… what was causing the damage in the cells was the rapidly alternating fields and not the current itself, but a byproduct of the current. If one could utilize the same fields without the current, they could essentially perform the same procedure without the same stigma. A masterful trick really.

    Thank you for your efforts and dedication to help this whole overall situation we find ourselves in, while pursuing the Do No Harm approach and also not turning your back on the problems we see. It takes no lack of courage and fortitude, I am sure.

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  • Thank you so much Miranda, as always!

    You are absolutely right, the lack of knowledge for such a serious procedure does not make sense, in a fundamental way. Its hard to filter through the layers of impropriety.

    Thank you for the recommendation as well, believe it or not i had not given that much though yet. I suppose it would behoove me to get a bit more organized about it and try and prepare for what may lie ahead. It will also make it easy for me to distribute.

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  • Wow Dun, Wow.

    I am a little bit surprised at the request for 3 rounds of 36 treatments, that is the first I have seen that much of a recommendation outside of what i was told about from stories from vets. I am afraid that would be the similar to what we see in severe poly drugging. I am very glad you had the presence of mind to get out of there during the early sessions, we really do have to look out for ourselves, most often these clinicians will not. In this case they were probably looking forward to the 15k to 45k dollar payday.

    And then to find out it was a real physiological problem, I cant tell you how many times that has occurred with others. There is very, very commonly a good explanation for the psychological symptoms, of course not to mention the physical ones. Sometimes its the lack of diligence on behalf of Drs that jams us up so bad. 15 minutes per patient, yes i am sure that is long enough to figure out someone has early signs of MS. That was my best sarcastic voice of course.

    Sorry to hear about the probably MS diagnosis. If you are looking for a good read on it, I have been doing ‘The Candida Cure’ protocol for diet and the author and a friend of mine overcame their MS diagnosis with it. It is a book by Ann Boroch.

    Well said, beokay.

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  • snowyowl,

    Thank you so much for taking the time out to read it. I have to agree that it does all seem to intersect somehow, or at least my gut is telling me that is true. The more we learn the clearer the picture seems to become.

    Thanks for taking a look at my other article as well. The comments may be a bit of a beast but i do think they are an incredibly good read as well. Keep your eye open for the ramblings of Boans and myself, they do tend to drag on a bit, but its very interesting in my opinion.

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  • Thought you might like this one Sam, glad to hear it.

    It was very interesting, the progression of all this. At the beginning I did believe in the legitimacy of everything you mentioned although I had some skepticism. Then, i had to actually go through it all and learn more and more at every step until i came to the same conclusions.

    Another thing I see quite a bit is that these problems we identify as mental health issues are very often undiscovered physiological health problems Dr’s don’t take the time to understand. So the lack of evidence for real mental illness becomes even bigger. We have these undiagnosed or ineffectively treated physical issues and then of course normal reactions to human to stress and trauma that we mislabel and vilify. It all makes what is left a very thin area of the population, certainly nowhere near 1 in 4, and, we mishandle that. I wonder what would happen if we cut through all the rubbish and focused all our efforts on helping that small percentage, how well we could do. Wishful thinking maybe, lol.

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  • Poetry really John. I think it is very interesting the forced depth of soul we gain from these sorts of horrors. Not sure if you were as eloquent before all this, I am sure you were to some extent. I certainly had the ability to write before but it was not until I was harmed that i started to lean on it so much and cultivated it.

    One thought that came up for me while reading is the interpersonal lies we tell to grease the wheels. What a profound indicator of malevolence. Once we cross that line, it becomes very real that we are in a place we should not be and that something gravely wrong has taken place. I can imagine a POW feels quite the same in that respect.

    I am so glad we met, and your voice is a particularly brilliant one, I am glad we are in this fight together. I hope you find yourself well in some real way.

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