SAFE: Survivors And Families Empowered—An Update

More than four decades ago, I was sitting on the deck of the summer house I am sharing in the Berkshires with five people from New York city. My roommates returned to work in the city after extended weekends in the house. My plan was to use my alone time, Tuesday to Thursday, to make real my overpowering drive to write my story. What happened to me and others like me?

Looking at the sky through the opening in the trees, with the yellow pad on my lap, I struggled to begin the book that it would take many years to complete. Time to put up, I began writing…

They rode in silence to Fair Oaks Hospital, parents aching for the recovery of a broken child. One powerful certainty bridged their differences—their son would never be abandoned. Without knowing who was enemy or ally, a deadly threat propelled them on their mission…

“What’s wrong with him?” my parents pleaded. “He’s always been a good boy. When will he get better? What should we do? How did this happen? Whose fault, is it?”

The questions were for the doctor, but later would be asked of God. A broken foot was for the doctor, but a broken boy—who is to treat such a sickness? Their generation had witnessed the medical miracles of modern science. They regarded the doctor with reverence. Indeed, the doctor was royalty…

“He is a very sick boy,” the doctor declared. “You must trust us to treat him in the way we know best; otherwise he could be in a mental hospital for the rest of his life. You have to follow our instructions and leave him to us, or we won’t be able to help him.”

Is what my family encountered truly different, better now than 50 years ago? Perhaps we have more false confidence in the progress we have made relying on biochemical explanations. I believe it would be more productive to look less at discovering drug-based solutions and more at the miraculous resiliency, fortitude and diversity of those struggling to pursue reaching their innate capability. This belief is what compelled me to create Survivors and Families Empowered (SAFE), a new and evolving effort to implement change in a system that doesn’t help.

My inner and outer journey to understand what happened to me could have been regarded as an obsession. Beyond that search, I was determined to use what I had learned to help others escape the control of a tainted profession. In my doctoral psychology program, I was drawn to specialize in families. Now, as I think about families, I recognize that it is not the sole mischief-maker, but one of numerous factors that challenge the search to determine one’s identity—to be and honor the path to align with our true selves. I believe that the medical model is the number one obstacle inhibiting progress. Just as it is easily accepted that no two snowflakes are identical, how do we ignore the legitimacy of recognizing that “you are uniquely you”—no one has ever existed exactly like you in the past, present or will in the future.

The medical profession must get past its adherence to a model that depends on unreliable, invalid diagnoses to determine the treatment methodology which typically results in prescribing ineffective, often harmful drugs. Out of the ordinary questionable behavior is not automatically a sign of mental illness but may be an attempt to understand who you are and how you can fit into an uninviting developmental environment.

In October 2023 I wrote an article for Mad in America, “Survivors and Families Working Together for Change.” Since then, with dedicated volunteers, a steering committee has been established. We have developed a website and strive to make SAFE a reality and a model for change.

Our intention is to examine how families can best use their power and influence to support a family member in discovering her or his way through a potentially resolvable crisis.

Our mission:

Survivors And Families Empowered (SAFE) is a coalition of psychiatric survivors, families, and mental health professionals who believe in the power of hope and the resilience of the human spirit. Our experiences have taught us that deconstructing the fears and myths about mental illness will reduce the over reliance on restrictive interventions which interfere with recovery. We believe that families who are not duped by the “experts” can support and help their loved ones prevail. The principles that underly our work are: Love, Hope, Empathy, Compassion, Respect and Openness to New Learning.

So where are we now? Our steering committee meets weekly to discuss our pilot project and learn how to best help an individual and family. On our website, we have a survey to consider the expressed needs that families and individuals face when a family member is experiencing a crisis. The survey asks the following four questions:

1. What did you or your family find helpful?
2. What did you or your family find harmful?
3. What did you or your family look for but were unable to find?
4. How do you define a crisis?

For the past year, our steering group has met weekly to work on how we can counter the damages that current mental health services unwittingly do to create a chronic mental patient population. We do not believe in formulated treatments based on unreliable and flawed diagnoses. In our group we continue to discuss our values and the importance of honoring personal agency. We hope to combat the increasing reliance on force, too often used with the justification “for your own good.” We talk about how forced interventions inhibit reintegration into the family once the crisis has been resolved. Discussions of our personal lived experiences help us consider what might work for others. Essentially, we wish to promote an understanding within families of their own resources and where to find supportive alternative services that best suits their needs

For many years I searched to understand my other-worldly experience of madness and how I was transformed by it. During that intense search I came across a passage from the book Beyond Culture, where anthropologist Edward Hall states that “failure to fulfill one’s potential can be one of the most devastating and damaging things to occur to a person.” Hall continues, “A kind of gnawing emptiness, longing, frustration, and displaced anger takes over when this occurs. Whether the anger is turned inward on the self or outward toward others, dreadful destruction results.”

We are developing SAFE with the underlying assumption that there are a great number of families who are caring and loving. We believe that recovery/transformation is possible for everyone. The resilience and power of the human spirit may be more difficult for some to tap into, and although it may seem impossible to feel and connect with, it is there—waiting to be awakened.

This October, our steering committee will be gathering in person in Santa Fe to teach co-facilitators how to develop and conduct multifamily groups. The groups are designed to provide education and support—not therapy. By using the lived expertise of the participant families, we will work to decrease the number of people who are unnecessarily hospitalized against their will. We hope to learn together from this pilot project and use what we have learned to keep constructing more multifamily groups to counter the confusion, blame, shame and loneliness that interferes with the healing power of hope. To meet with a group of people weekly to discuss how to make it better for those who follow us, and their families, is a rare privilege for which I am very grateful.

In 2016, I was approached by a reporter, Nicolae Tanase, about writing a one-page essay on the meaning of life. He was compiling a book featuring writing from an assortment of people from different fields. The essays were published in the book, What is the Meaning of Life and also can be read for free at https://excellencereporter.com/.

Below is what I wrote eight years ago and continue to believe.

Excellence Reporter: Dr. Bassman, what is the meaning of life?

Ron Bassman: Locked in the seclusion room of the mental hospital, secured in restraints with mind-numbing psychiatric drugs coursing through my body, my spirit found a safe hiding place where it could hibernate. Such was the major crisis that would be instrumental in determining the trajectory of my life. I was blessed to learn that the human spirit has the power to overcome an imprisoned broken body.

I am not privy to a universal truth that would assign and define a meaning that all living organisms share. I humbly submit what gives meaning to my life: that the unknown and unknowable nurtures in me an awe and respect for the power of spirit. My good fortune obliges me to use what I know in service to others. I believe that each of our lives has unique meaning that emerges as we play out our corporal existence.

To contemplate the meaning of life was more important to me during the years I struggled to emerge from my formative cocoon. Now I am aware that meaning is manifested in the way I live my life rather than in the ruminating. philosophizing and searching to conquer life’s mysteries. My decisions and the actions they generate are guided by an experience-based pragmatism vested in intuition, empathy and compassion. Meaning is embedded in the tough choices that inform my attempts to live with integrity.

What clears my vision and supports my journey are principles forged in a crucible that challenged my survival. I believe that in our darkest moments or in our greatest highs we have an opening to find the courage to seek clarity within our hearts. Meaning is developed through events where circumstances do not allow equivocation.

I offer what gives me meaning—what I strive for within my imperfect life. I wish for one principle to be accessible to all: A Never Give Up attitude that makes you available to the always possible mysterious miracle that hovers in all of our lives.