Editor’s Note: This is the first in a series written by Sean Gunderson, who was detained by the criminal justice system for 17 years after receiving a “not guilty by reason of insanity” verdict. The series documents the life of a forensic psychiatry patient—a world that few know, and which has rarely been written about by a former inmate. New pieces will be published the first weekend of each month. The full series is being archived here.

I am so glad that you are taking an interest in what life is like in the forensic mental health system. I lived that life for 17 years and in a very real sense, I am an expert on it. My expertise does not come from talking about the forensic mental health system as an observer, but rather living it and talking about my experiences as a participant-observer.

I have tried to take an ugly topic, one that is difficult to talk and read about, and make it fun and interesting, which is challenging to say the least. To be blunt, life in those places is nightmarish, especially when one does not know how the future will play out. Here I am, almost two decades after the initial events that led to my finding of Not Guilty by Reason of Insanity (NGRI), and I am able to discuss my experiences openly because they are finally over.

I have always wanted healing, but I was in the custody of not just people, but also an ideology. When my healing did not comport with the expectations of the medical model, I found myself in a struggle for survival.

Currently, the only narrative available for interpreting life in a forensic mental health facility is one-sided, discriminatory, and based on the intersection of medical model psychiatry and criminality in the US. Such a narrative is inadequate for truly understanding life in these places.

The current narrative casts forensic mental patients as “dangerous people who need medical model-based treatment in order to return to society.” While this narrative is useful for the community to justify the ongoing detention of forensic mental patients, it serves little purpose for helping the community to understand real life in those places. As this series is intended to help the audience understand real life in a forensic mental health facility and not to merely contribute to the justification for detaining human beings as forensic mental patients, I had to depart from the standard narratives we use to talk about forensic psychiatric institutions.

As I was contemplating the best way to present accounts of real life in a forensic psychiatric institution, I struggled to find the terminology to be able to capture a very complex and convoluted situation. Indeed, it is so unique that people who have never lived through it cannot understand it.

However, I realized there was a salient narrative that could potentially capture the constant, intense nature of the conflict that is at the heart of daily experience in a forensic psychiatric institution. This narrative is that of military conflict. First, it is easily recognized and understood by the audience. Next, it is highly effective at capturing the unique type of human conflict present in these places. Finally, it is creative and allows me to take an ugly, miserable topic and transform it into something that could interest almost anyone.  However, there is another reason why I chose the military conflict narrative.

There are few situations in life where the threat of death is so immediate. Military conflict is certainly one of these. The constant threat of death and harm seems to activate an animalistic survival instinct in human beings. When a soldier is in combat, self-preservation instincts take over. The mind of the solider is vigilant and intently focused on survival. The only thing that really matters is surviving the situation. The rest of the life of that soldier can only be realized if they survive, and the soldier recognizes this as an animal being hunted by death. Death or serious physical injury could be around any corner and the soldier must be prepared to look death square in the eyes and defend themselves.

The emotional intensity of war caused by this constant confrontation with death and injury translates well to daily life in a forensic mental institution. It is this constant state of vigilance against the threat of death and injury that is at the heart of daily life in a forensic mental institution.

Between the daily conflict and threat of death and injury, the military metaphor is ideally suited to serve as a literary device to help you, the audience, truly understand real life in a forensic mental institution—including not just events, but also feelings and mental states.

Arrival

Welcome to a new frontier in human experience. I will be your guide on a complex and convoluted journey that will take us through the Illinois forensic mental health system, including the historical and infamous Elgin Mental Health Center. Before we depart, I am going to issue you some important conceptual tools that you will need on this journey.

I will use the term “detention center” (DC) throughout this series. This term is used because it is broad enough to encompass various types of institutions of detention from a forensic mental institution to a jail to a prison to an immigration detention center (to name some salient examples in our current society). However, this term is also broad enough to include other types of detention centers such as concentration camps, institutions of forced servitude (i.e., enslavement), and really any social situations in which an artificial culture is created and maintained along the lines of a unique type of social division: those who cannot leave and those who can.

When these two groups are forced to exist in the same location for long periods of time, unique things happen that do not happen in The World. (Inmates in almost any DC refer to life outside the DC as “The World”). First, the  aforementioned social classes of those who can and cannot leave do not even exist in The World, so nobody living in those newly created classes has any outside reference point to help them understand how to navigate the complex social situation, whether as an inmate or staff. Second, these two classes are artificially created and imposed upon real human beings. The classes have little to do with any other type of social classification found in The World. The dividing line is simply those who cannot leave versus those who can. This social classification cuts right through and supersedes other types of classifications that exist out in The World, such as wealth, race, gender, etc.

You will be guided from the perspective of a unique figure within the class of people who cannot leave.

In general, DCs have ideologies attached to them which influence the artificial culture that arises and is maintained within them. A forensic mental institution is informed by different ideologies than a prison, yet both share the commonality of a strict division of classes between those who can and cannot leave. One cannot understand any type of DC without understanding this unique class conflict.

The name “staff” will be used to describe the class of people who can leave. “Inmates” will be the term used to describe the class of people who cannot leave. The conflict between the two classes exists because the staff must create, impose, and maintain an artificial culture upon the inmates against the resistance of the inmates. Inmates are no less human than the staff, no matter what led them to the DC. They still want to be human after being forced into the DC and will find ways to express their humanity within the limits of the imposed culture.

Next, I share with you the concept of a liaison. A liaison is one of the most significant members of the culture in a unit and/or the entire DC. One cannot understand DCs without understanding the role of a liaison. Lucky for you, I happened to become a liaison when I was confined in the Illinois forensic mental health system for almost 17 years. A liaison is a unique and complicated figure that arises organically out of a dialectical tension between the staff and inmates.

Both groups have an interest in constructing a culture that is agreeable to them. However, as they are forced into a superior (staff) and inferior (inmates) division, there is a certain “natural” rule that governs. This natural rule is the rule of consensus. If enough individuals of both groups agree to a certain type of culture on an individual living unit or the entire facility, then that becomes the culture. It is a sort of unofficial democracy that exists. That is, there is generally no official voting that occurs; rather, there is simple a consensus among those who share the most power.

A liaison is always an inmate who is seen as a leader by the other inmates with whom they live. Ongoing friction (between a superior and inferior class forced to live together in a close-quarters environment) results in a continual reshaping of the culture. The friction constantly creates a sense of instability which often is remedied by the liaison.

Both inmates and staff have incentive to ensure stability of the culture. For inmates, it mitigates the difficulties of being detained. For staff, it makes their job much easier. That is, if the inmates consent to a specific type of imposed culture, then there is less resistance among them. It is this mutual incentive which facilitates the consensus among major powers in both groups needed to “elect” the liaison. Consent is an extremely powerful force in a DC; indeed, it is the stabilizing force.

Power is a broad concept, but it is necessary to recognize how it operates in the DC. Governmental/official power created the institution which in turn uses its social legitimacy to create and maintain a binary class division. Staff powers include: making rules; punishing inmates; accessing and editing an inmate’s official records; communicating officially to the court about the inmate; having the presumption of correctness while interacting with inmates; granting access to events and items behind locked doors; searching inmates cells; knowing the intimate details of inmates’ lives; administering prescribed drugs to inmates; being able to tell inmates to do almost anything; and other powers resulting from their “parental” status over inmates.

However, inmates also have power themselves for various reasons: banding together into factions that may or may not use violent or coercive force to help shape the culture of the unit or facility; power previously held while out in The World; logic, reason, and effective argumentation; and the application of the law, among other forms of power.

The power of the liaison arises differently in different DCs. A liaison in a forensic psychiatric DC will likely look different from a liaison in a prison. The power that brings them to the position of liaison is different, as is the way the liaison subsequently applies the new power resulting from their liaison status. For example, a liaison in a prison may arrive at this position through overt violence and intimidation of both inmates and staff. However, a liaison in a forensic psychiatric DC would likely not use such violence as it is just not very conducive to acquiring power in those circumstances. While these are just examples, the takeaway is that the culture of each DC and indeed each living unit within each DC is unique and it is the unique tension between staff and inmates that gives rise to a particular liaison.

The liaison, once “elected,” has both great power and great responsibility. They have the responsibility to bring stability to the culture. Inmates look to them to create a comfortable-as-can-be culture on the living unit and/or facility. The staff look to them to do much of the work of maintaining an artificial culture so that the staff can allow the culture to function “on autopilot”; that is, with minimal intervention from them. Those readers who have been confined to or worked in a DC, especially for a prolonged period of time, may recognize these people as the ones who would “run the unit/deck.”

An example of a liaison is the “capo” described by Viktor Frankl in Man’s Search for Meaning. Based on the descriptions provided by Frankl, it appears that the capo was essentially fulfilling this liaison role. The capo was a Jewish person confined to the concentration camp who would receive perks from their German captors for helping to control the other Jewish inmates, sometimes brutally. While a manifestation of a liaison in a Nazi concentration camp would differ substantially in the type of power needed to rise to that position and the manner in which it was applied once attained, I can see the underlying themes which I have described present in the capos. In short, capos, like other liaisons, were inmates who helped to control the culture to make the job of their captors easier.

It is important to note that not all living units have a liaison. That is, if there is inadequate consensus among the staff and inmates as to whom should be in that role, then there will be no liaison. However, both groups are incentivized to find and “elect” one. For the inmates, it ensures a more stable and “less uncomfortable” experience, and for the staff it offers an easier workday.

Equipment

This little thing is far better than a compass or GPS system. It is your Inner Guidance System (IGS). A compass or GPS can only guide you in the physical world. However, your IGS can help you to find yourself within as well as to navigate the treacherous social environment through which we will be journeying. The trick with the IGS is that you need to remember to actually use it. There is no automated feature; instead, you will have to use it by connecting with that still silent part of you that many of us refer to as intuition.

You may think that such a thing would be easy to remember to use. However, in the midst of the zone of active human conflict into which we will be entering, it is easy to get distracted by the constant suffering that will be going on within and around you. At times it may hurt so much to be alive that you will not want to look within. Your life may be a daily nightmare that seems like it will never end. You may find yourself struggling to face the day and desperate for any distraction from the suffering within and around you. Ironically, these are the most important times to use your IGS; indeed, it may save your life.

You will need these, they are “strange nostalgia binoculars.” During prolonged psychological trauma resulting from extended periods of detention, I found myself looking back upon certain aspects of my experience with this strange nostalgia. That is, I remembered certain events with a mental filter that excluded all the negativity from them and what was left were the few elements of the experience that were positive. I call it strange nostalgia because one simultaneously recognizes that these memories were formed from experiences of the present moment, in which there was substantial distress. However, that distress does not make it into the memories.

I could recall feeling a sense of strange nostalgia when I would look back at softball games in the nightmarish Chester Mental Hell Center (not a typo). While each moment was a living nightmare, I would recall the games with a certain fondness. Indeed, I would engage in this strange nostalgic reflection to distract myself from the living nightmare that was the present moment. I give you these binoculars so that when you encounter situations that are just too difficult to think about, use them and you will only see the few positive elements present there. The negative 99% will be filtered out and the positive 1% present in that situation will remain.

Here, you will need these, too. They are “true vision goggles.” The true intentions of various people in there will be substantially obscured. You will have trouble distinguishing staff and inmates that can help you from those intent on harming you. These goggles will illuminate the “true colors” of individuals. Do not fall into the trap of believing that just because you see one good person in there who intends to help, that others surrounding them are on the same page.

This is your standard issue weapon. No, it is not a gun, knife, or club. In fact, it is not really considered to be a weapon at all in traditional human conflict. Your standard issue weapon is actually an integral part of who you are as a human being. It derives from the very humanity that will be taken from you once you step into the DC. This humanity will be taken by the narratives that justify the artificial class construction of those who cannot leave versus those who can. This standard issue weapon is simply your awareness. Lucky for you, the staff and society takes these narratives seriously so they will overlook this weapon, though it is a very real threat to any DC. They will generally forget about it, as they are hypnotized by the dehumanizing narratives used to maintain the strict class division.

You will need to be careful to protect your standard issue weapon. Due to the environment, various factors can reduce the acuity of your awareness and, thus, the efficacy of your weapon. These include the gross lack of mental stimulation in everyday life; stress; previous or current trauma; Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress (IIED or double-IED) by malicious staff; and brain-damaging therapeutics (BDTs). BDTs is the term that will be used to describe psychiatric drugs (i.e., medication). BDTs was an original way to conceptualize such chemicals at the time of their inception.

It is far more useful to understanding their role in the DC by returning to that conceptualization instead of using more modern ones that obscure the intent of the use of such chemicals in the DC. Certain staff recognize the potential for BDTs to be weaponized against inmates. We will be journeying through a zone of active human conflict, and I would not want you, the reader, to be misled and put in danger with a euphemistic narrative.

Always secure your standard issue weapon, as we will face IIEDs, which is what can happen when staff recognize and oppose your application of awareness. Be especially careful of IIEDs in situations where there is a power struggle between the staff and inmates. If they realized that your awareness can be applied effectively to secure your freedom, they would likely consider it contraband and try to reduce its acuity as much as possible prior to entry into any DC. Use your weapon prudently. Trust me; it will save your life.

Be on the lookout for additional “weapons” that you can pick up while you are in the DC. These weapons are tactics that can help you influence your environment. They will help you to construct “micro-narratives” which counter the official narrative and which you will need to find freedom. Your standard issue weapon alone will be insufficient to secure your freedom.

Put this vest on. It is a “reality-proof vest” (RPV). It will stop reality in its tracks and give you the ability to make your imagination real. You may need to use your imagination to convince yourself of nearly anything in order to find the will to survive. While some may construe this as advocating for fantasy or even delusional thinking, the concepts of fantasy or delusion do not capture the very practical nature of imaginative thinking while in the DC. This type of thinking is a grey area. It is not quite fantasy, as you may find yourself really believing it.

Yet, using labels that imply symptomatology are not a clean fit here. Symptoms of a so-called mental illness must interfere with your ability to participate in the life of whatever culture in which you find yourself. Making your imagination real may actually help you survive the DC, and thus using the term “delusion” can obscure the very real and practical benefit of using your RPV to survive a DC.

While believing strange things may interfere with your ability to hold a job in The World, these same beliefs may save your life in the DC. You will be under extreme duress and your mind may play tricks on you. You will need to be OK with thinking things that you may consider strange if you were in The World. Indeed, your imagination may help get you through this ordeal so that you can return to life. Trust me, your very survival necessitates a new kind of relationship to your own thinking. Nothing is really “off the table” on the inside.

The only thing I must caution you about is to stay aware of what is deemed acceptable to talk about in the culture of the DC. If your ideas would be considered acceptable in the context of the culture of the DC, then you can share them if you choose. However, if they would not be considered acceptable, I advise you to keep them within your RPV—it may save your life. But always remember that this vest is rather heavy and do not let it interfere with your ability to assess staff and inmates’ personalities for potential allies.

Finally, this is a sight for your standard issue weapon. It is the best problem solver you can use. It is called an attitude of gratitude sight (AGS) because it helps you find things for which to be grateful. Whenever you encounter a serious problem that you must find the will to face and overcome, you can use this sight to focus your awareness on things for which you are grateful. Indeed, in any problem situation, the first thing that you want to focus on is not the problem itself, but rather that which you are grateful for in the moment. It will give you a clear awareness with which to make a good decision. You will find that one of the problems that you will need to regularly use it for is waking up in the morning to face a new day.

Search for Contraband

As we are entering a secure institution, one where an artificial culture must be maintained against active resistance to its imposition, there are certain things that are restricted. Yes, we are going to have to search you prior to entering. You will not be allowed to take in certain things with you. Lucky for you, we are going on a descriptive tour and not a physical one. In the descriptive tour, you will be allowed to keep your cell phone, shoelaces, and keys. However, you will be searched for ideas that could pose a security risk to the DC. Namely, you will be required to put aside many of the narratives on which you rely to make sense of reality.

Many of the assumptions that we take for granted in The World could pose a security risk to the maintenance of this artificial culture. Indeed, they may give inmates ideas that the staff do not want them to have, and so you cannot bring them inside. You are literally entering a different world.

List of Contraband Ideas

Equality or egalitarianism is not permitted within the DC.  The DC must maintain a strict class division based on inequality. All humans are not created equal while in the DC. Those who can leave are equal and those who cannot are inferior to those who can leave.

Your understanding of morality is not permitted while in the DC. While general notions of morality may inform subsequent micro-narratives created within the DC, you will have to leave your morality behind. The new task you will have is simply this: saving your own life. That is, you will have to convince the class of those who can leave to release you, otherwise you will die a slow, miserable death in the DC. You will watch your life wither and die slowly over decades as you are drugged into submission day in and day out until finally your body quits and you die. You will look out your window and see The World, but never be able to participate in it unless you are released. So, trust me leaving your morality here may save your life.

Your sense of humor cannot come inside. Do not worry, you will find a new sense of humor while you are inside. It will still be uniquely “you” in that it will arise out of your personality. However, you may find yourself laughing at things that you would not find funny in The World. Once again, trust me, this too may help save you.

Your own self-image and how you believe that you relate to The World are not permitted. Maybe you are a doctor, lawyer, researcher, teacher, or store clerk. You have developed an image in your mind of who you are; you could call this your identity. This identity cannot come inside. However, you will be able to develop a new identity that comports with the available micro-narratives present in the culture of the DC.

Your sexuality cannot come inside either. I know, it is a major aspect of your life and identity. It is also a source of happiness and bonding with other humans. You will be assigned a new sexuality that will save your life, if you can adhere to it. Whether you like it or not, agree with it or not, you are now asexual. Trust me, this one is important and will save your life. If you try to sneak your now “contraband” sexuality into the DC, I am confident that you will regret it.

We will be entering a forensic psychiatric DC, sometimes referred to as a “hospital.” Indeed, these DCs are accredited by hospital accreditation commissions. Do not be distracted by this. This is not a hospital like the one that you went to when you had to have your tonsils removed. This is a DC, period. I have seen people struggle with this to their disadvantage. Holding onto your current understanding of a “hospital” will diminish your ability to successfully navigate—and ultimately survive—a treacherous and divisive culture. Ultimately, your life may depend on you letting go of the idea that these places are “hospitals.”

The expectation of privacy is not allowed inside. There is no room for privacy. You will have to be OK with strange people knowing you better than you feel comfortable with. You will need to learn to live with these people whether they are inmates or staff. You will also get to know some people more than you want to know them. Furthermore, the privacy of information enshrined in the Health Insurers Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA) will be largely irrelevant in these so-called hospitals.

You will quickly see how important the free flow of certain “private” information is for the maintenance of an artificial culture, especially for a liaison. Fortunately, as you will have the perspective of an inmate, HIPAA will not apply to you, as it only applies to staff. As I give you a guided tour of a forensic psychiatric DC, I will use privacy in accordance with how a liaison and the staff would use it. That is, when it is strategic to conceal information, privacy can be invoked in a micro-narrative. However, if it is strategic to share otherwise private information, then I will do so.

Departure

Great, now that you have been issued your equipment and searched for contraband ideas, let us depart on our journey. In this journey I will present various themes and related accounts out of chronological order. This presentation allows for the best understanding of real life inside a forensic psychiatric DC. We will essentially hop around time to explore various themes. Buckle up and secure your inner guidance system, strange nostalgia binoculars, true vision goggles, reality-proof vest, standard issue weapon, and attitude of gratitude sight, as it will be a bumpy ride. In the first account, we will explore the ground where death and life meet, and you will be shown why you were not allowed to bring your morality on this journey.

Each account will be accompanied by a briefing and debriefing. Not only does this support the military conflict narrative being applied, but more practically, it will allow you to discover important concepts prior to and after each account. They are intended to give you a deeper appreciation of each account. Furthermore, what you learn in any briefing or debriefing may be applied to other accounts. The series will be presented as if you, the reader, are embedded with me in a zone of active human conflict. You go where I go and do what I do, and you will survive just like I did. As you read this series, always remember that no one knew how the future would play out as the events were happening and that I was not guaranteed survival and a “happy ending.” One false move and I may very well have ended up stuck in the DC for life.

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Sean Gunderson
Sean Gunderson is a survivor of nearly two decades of psychiatric detention. He found solace during those times by engaging in a daily spiritual practice rooted in meditation. Now free of the psychiatric system that detained him for his entire youth, he offers his insights on the mental health system in hopes of transforming it into what it is intended to be: a system where people who need help can go to truly heal.

12 COMMENTS

  1. Now what can I say about forensic psychiatry? First of all, my twin brother and I were both victims of a criminal racketeering scheme involving using us as guinea pigs for unethical medical experiments on the brain. And the perpetrators did this in a complicated way using the legal system and the mafia.

    This now starts to get — well, I’ll be accused of name dropping but it is real.

    Harvard University was involved as was McLeans Hospital. And they used their connections to rope in some pretty high profile people in it as well.

    Actually, one truly horrible “twist” I might add is how much they warned me that, not only do they have connections to the government and can rely upon the government to cover things up for them, but they ensured me they also have connections to the New York Times and pretty much have the New York Times wrapped around their little finger. Meaning, if the govt does a cover up that smells really bad, e.g., disregards major evidence, well the New York Times will not only cover up the malfeasance of the government but will also work very hard to discredit me as well.

    Harvard insiders not only warned me of that but then, as if on cue, the New York Times and NYT owned Boston Globe then proceeded to do some slavish editorials showing extreme favoritism towards Harvard and shameless suck up toady behavior towards Harvard, as well as snarky attacks on a writer who criticized Harvard, so as to ensure that I’d know the threats by Harvard insiders weren’t empty threats.

    And then on two well timed occasions, the NYT published articles detailing how they had been “soft on Hitler” during the holocaust and buried news of it on their back pages in order to minimize the holocaust. Everyone knew, at the time I read the New York Times very thoroughly and would not have missed that.

    All stuff that might seem like coincidences, when viewed in isolation, but when viewed as a pattern, it just strikes me as too much like lighting striking at the same place over and over again too many times to be “just a coincidence.”

    But one can’t say there were any smoking guns because it was all very “Clintonesque.” As in “slick willy.”

    Anyway, one such time the NYT has to publish a “we were soft on Hitler” mea culpa was right after my identical twin brother was literally accused of stalking Lauren Bush, George W. Bush’s niece. And I knew something about that and knew that she and one other person were encouraging him or trying to set him up, lure him into doing something stupid so they could accuse him — and he WAS stupid, unlike me. And I will admit/agree he was REALLY stupid there, because I know what he was like.

    However, the case was never adjudicated because forensic psychiatrists went and dragged their feet and dragged their feet, delaying things until a judge ruled that the charges were so weak, even if they took him to trial, he would get off on “time served.” And then my parents got a guardianship over him where they had him forced medication, under the pretense that he was schizophrenic.

    However, privately I was told that what they really wanted to study was, they wanted to use healthy non-schizophrenic identical twins for a study on the brain to determine that, when studies show that schizophrenics have brain shrinkage, it’s the anti-psychotics causing the brain shrinkage and not the disease, schizophrenia causing it. And they wanted to do this research criminally, and then threaten to repeat same research in a non-criminal setting where it can’t be covered up, and agree not to do so if drug manufacturers give them massive bribes. This was Harvard and McLeans Hospital.

    I was the twin who was being used as a “control.” Anyway, I had a ton of documentary evidence showing that all mental illness diagnoses of my twin brother were blatantly fraudulent and indefensible, and that my parents were lying and not to be trusted and that I had caught them lying numerous times.

    All forensic psychiatrists refused to talk to me or answer phone calls but talked extensively with my parents. It was like a “white wall of silence.” Not only that, but my twin brother had a language disorder which was entirely the fault of my parents, who isolated him as a kid and deprived him of the opportunity to fully learn how to speak as a kid, so he did not fully learn how to talk until a teenager, and these late-acquired language skills were skills that could go dormant if isolated for too long — like a foreigner whose English language gets rusty if they go back to their own country for awhile.

    So what the forensic psychiatrists did was to put my brother in solitary confinement, at all times when he was refusing to take medication, until his language skills got worse and worse and worse, and then he would agree to take medication to get out of solitary confinement, and then the moment he was out of solitary confinement, his language skills came back. And then they misdiagnosed his language disorder as “schizophrenia.” Except this was all super super corrupt. And in order to get away with this, they not only had to stonewall me and refuse to even talk to me, but then I then had a group of people stalk and threaten me and threaten to kill me, in order to prevent me from intervening in the guardianship proceedings that were done via a faked “schizophrenic” diagnosis. And I even got fired as well from my job, where people who were complicit with what happened to my brother worked.

    And then afterwards I got date rape drugged and raped numerous times, framed by cops on false drug charges over and over again, and then almost murdered with rat poison but I survived, albeit with slight brain damage that causes occasional language issues just bad enough so nobody can deny I got brain damage from something. I was also involuntarily drugged with all sorts of unknown substances which I still to this day don’t know what they were. By criminals in my apartment, except I could not go to the police about them as they would not cooperate.

    By the way, one other issue. Though I refer to me being used as a guinea pig for unethical nazi like “twin” experiments, like how Hitler experimented on identical twins in Auschwitz, there seems to be another problem with the Bush family, having to do with what the motives were for the Iraq war and war in Afghanistan.

    Based on what I was told by a graduate student in the Harvard Math Department, apparently the motives for the war were to help the computer industry do a “medical revolution” quickly whereby they could cut ethical corners and do all sorts of human experimentation “quickly” and “cheaply” — which would lead to all sorts of advances in products involving robotics and medicine that could make HUGE amounts of money and assist with all sorts of interesting things, like robotic performed microsurgery, and other similar stuff.

    So apparently Iraqi and Afghanistan citizens were experimented on, en masse for all this, as were soldiers blackmailed over — well, these are war crimes, you know. Some soldiers were forced to do it to Iraqis, then blackmailed because they had done it to Iraqis, and experimented on themselves.

    Now let me also explain something. I was told all this secretive stuff even while Harvard did its to use its connections to the mental health system to have me tarnished as “mentally ill.” But in a way that wouldn’t really fly, so long as I was still alive. Too many contradictions, with portrayals of me drastically way off from what everyone knows my personality is.

    Well, just prior to the rat poison incident, police who framed me on false charges also made false accusations of “disorderly conduct” wherein — you should have seen the way they portrayed me. These were the most embarrassing and humiliating charges anyone can be brought up on, but I wasn’t embarrassed or humiliated because everyone knows it’s not how I would act. At least so long as I was alive.

    In some cases, the police made me seem like Marlon Brando in “on the waterfront” – which is not what I am like. In other cases, well, just very undignified.

    How did they try to rig the rat poison incident? Well, as luck would have it, I got only a fraction of the dose they thought I had gotten, and it wasn’t lethal. Well, someone goes and when I am in the bathroom, trashes my hotel room and breaks my laptop in half so I can no longer communicate with the outside world.

    Since I’d only gotten a tiny dose of rat poison, I was well enough to just run down and try to call the police after the intruder left, only to see that the front desk clerk was shocked, surprised, horrified, terrified. Because he wasn’t expecting to see me alive and well and they were in the middle of a murder that was intended to be covered up by faked forensics, and me coming down and complaining in front of everyone about an intruder is disastrous to would-be murderers in a mafia controlled hotel. He, of course, wouldn’t call the police and tried to urge me to go back to my room, so I ran and went to another business and made THEM call the police. Who took me to the hospital to save my life.

    I didn’t even know I had rat poison in me. But the police knew that’s what it was and the hospital knew that’s what it was and they didn’t even need to talk to me, they knew how to treat it without asking a single question. Because they had been working in cahoots with the criminals. But I guess they had to abort it once I was seen by too many witnesses running outdoors for help in my underwear in January.

    Anyway, it would appear to be the case that, if the rat poison incident had succeeded, I am guessing they would have said that I flew into a rage and trashed my hotel room and broke my laptop in half in a Donald Trump style temper tantrum.

    This whole organized crime scheme was perpetrated by a bunch of progressives, I should note. So, as can be expected, they would falsify things to have me portrayed in the same way as Donald Trump, all the while if my own family dared to suggest the death was suspicious, they’d have a bunch of little twits come out of the woodwork and explain they’d had a bad encounter with me “and it was terrifying.” Or something like that.

    In other words a whole bunch of little twits would have badmouthed me in very dishonest ways and I would not have been able to answer back due to being dead. For some reason, I almost think that’s funny and it also reminds me of the classical Jim Crow stereotype of the damsel in distress “terrified” about a black man who “menaced” her, therefore he needs to be lynched.

    Oh yes. One other disturbing fact. The Harvard Math graduate student who told me of a “medical revolution” motive for the wars told it to me even before September 11th. Which, of course, would imply that maybe the tech industry was involved in September 11th in some way, even if in a super indirect “laundered” way.

    By the way, I hate having to be the one to have to “come forward” about this type of stuff. It’s as if Harvard repeatedly set me up to be some kind of “point man” to “come forward” about lots of corruption. Or tell people about lots of corruption. As if they went out of their way to try to train me to be a conspiracy theorist.

    Oh yes and, by the way, regarding Harvard corruption, in the 60’s, my mother worked as a researcher for Jean Mayer in the area of nutrition.

    Oh here, this proves it, here is my mother “Lenore” on the lower left, Jean Mayer and other Harvard researchers pictured too. Weirdly enough, in part of the scrap book I didn’t include, my mother had even references a researcher who studied the affects of cold on human bodies in Germany of all places, I do believe. Isn’t that one of the experiments Hitler did on the Jews?

    https://pbase.com/damian1974/image/159785949

    https://associationofanaesthetists-publications.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1365-2044.2004.04034.x

    Oh wait, no, here it is:

    https://pbase.com/damian1974/image/159785937

    “Suisse woman who studied physiological adaptation to cold.”

    I don’t feel 100 percent sure if that might not have been an attempt on my mother’s part to hint about Nazi Germany or to hint as to having been privvy to info at Harvard pertaining to corruption as bad, but I suspect it because of things my mother privately told me, going all the way back to when I was a kid.

    According to her, what she told me when I was a kid in the 80’s, all the nutrition research from the 60’s was bogus, and was falsified as a result of donations to Harvard (and other places) by General Mills and grains’ manufacturers. At the time, when I was told that, my mother would have come across as a nut, because the findings from the 60’s still held sway. Only starting in the 90’s, all of those studies from the 60’s were debunked and what I witnessed growing up was to see everything my mother told me as a kid being proven to have been right over and over again.

    What my mother also told me, however, was of Liz Blount. Who my mother references here:

    https://pbase.com/damian1974/image/159785932

    Liz Blount drowned in her bathroom from an overdose of sleeping pills, and my mother was “officially” the last person to see her alive, so all witnesses said. It all worked out so police ruled it a suicide all the while — well, according to my mother, that’s why she was forced to raise my twin brother and me as guinea pigs in the first place. “They won’t put us in jail, so long as we move to Maine and raise you the way we are raising you.”

    But it is also true that all of the other nutrition researchers from the 60’s knew what had happened to my mother. The truth is, the research from the 60’s was inconclusive, it’s not that studies even showed we should stop eating saturated fats and instead eat lots of grains, high carbohydrate foods, and margarine. A bunch of high status Harvard educated professional men just bullshitted their way through it and “decreed” stuff that wasn’t supported by the data. But no one whistle blowed or called them on it.

    Though my mother did tell me something about knowing the woman who used the mechanical calculator to calculate the data, a woman who was “always so tired,” and for some reason that was part of how/why my mother knew the nutrition recommendations from the 60’s were bogus and a scam.

    Well, they are, aren’t they? Everyone knows about that too.

    • I also suffer from repressed memory syndrome, or maybe it’s that I suppress full memory recall of troubling facts, even though they are relevant to the point I am making, because it’s so triggering and so scary and I’ve worked so hard to get over PTSD and part of that was deliberately “trying to forget” some of the stuff that happened to me.

      The rat poison incident was not the only attempted murder. Here is a description of another incident, which I miraculously survived too. And in part I was very clever, which was interesting. Well, I am just someone who survives. Survival instinct can be very powerful.

      However, this attempted murder was something police were trying to do and stage as a “justifiable homicide” — or so that’s what it looked like.

      One interesting part I should note is how I talk of my parent’s trying to discredit me by calling me “bipolar.” Well, that’s the thing. I think they did that because they knew, if police can’t cover something up by portraying it as a “mental health issue,” they will instead cover it up by arranging for some kind of covered-up murder.

      So first it was going to be a police shooting. Allegedly “justifiable,” so they would have claimed. Then there was the rat poison incident. Which didn’t work. And then, after the rat poison incident was over with, there were zero other incidences. I decided “I have enough proof now to nail the perpetrators on everything.”

      OK, so here is the description of the Connecticut incident that happened right before I hired the second lawyer. The rat poison incident happened after I hired that lawyer.

      ——–
      This was ten years ago and, since then, Black Lives Matters has been going on and on and on about police shootings. In this instance, the man in CT was trying to set things up so as to make me look like a drug dealer who had just sold him drugs he already had at his place when I got there, and appeared to be trying to “set up” a scene whereby police could potentially shoot me and pretend they didn’t know better, e.g., “justifiable homicide.”

      Let me explain what this man did. I won’t go into all details but I knew something was wrong and I knew I had to leave and get out of there. He was not being nice about it. When I get outside, he suddenly says very loudly so everyone can hear “I will get you the money later” or something like that. As if I had delivered him drugs and expected money. But that was not all. I look at my cell phone and saw that I’d gotten three texts from strangers I did not know, all asking me about drugs in a manner so as to make it look like I was a drug dealer. It was scary. Then I go to the back yard and the neighbor next door is there, just waiting, and says “hi” in this almost friendly tone but it wasn’t friendly – it was passive aggressive “we are going to get you” nice.

      I suddenly knew this was a dangerous situation. It was dark and police could easily have pretended not to see well, thought I had a gun or weapon, and shot me. I thought to myself, what can I do that might be unpredictable in just the right way so, if they are going to kill me, they decide to abandon the attempt? I stripped naked, went to the ocean to swim, so that it would be clear I did not have a gun on me so they could not shoot.

      Police waited there for an hour while I was in the water – that’s exactly what the nurse in the hospital told me “they watched you for an hour before going into the water” – without saying a word and waiting for me to come out. Had I come out of the water, there was nothing stopping them from pretending to think I had a weapon on me, and shooting. I eventually started getting tired and then I pretended to start thrashing around in the water as if I was perhaps drowning. Immediately, they yell “Damian,” turn on five very bright strobe lights, and come rushing into the water so quickly with a rubber raft to “save” me – I wasn’t really drowning, I was just sick of waiting.

      The way it worked, so long as I was in the water, they could not shoot me IN the water and pretend they thought I had a gun. However, waiting for an hour for me to come out was not compatible with them having innocent intentions. But it could have worked maybe. Except, if they had LET me drown, then everyone would want to know, why did they see me in the water and wait silently without making a noise and just let me drown? When they obviously could see me the whole time? The only answer to that question was: they were trying to stage a “justifiable homicide” shooting scene, with witnesses there ready to lie and testify to whatever was necessary justify it.

      I could tell, though, by the panicked tone in their voices, that they were really scared at the thought of me drowning and them not having an explanation that could fit with a non-murderous narrative. Also, they got to me so fast, it was like they were panicking. I have never seen anyone in a rescue operation go and take a rubber raft and put it in the water faster and paddle out to me faster. In most rescue operations I ever see, they are not that frenzied. And, also, it was true that I dealt with them afterwards and they were VERY sheepish. Like they had a guilty conscience.

      It is also the case that I had been active enough in the water so that my legs were covered with scratches all over them from the rocks. Actually, the reason I was constantly diving down and picking up or looking for heavy rocks was in hopes of shielding myself in case they tried to shoot me while in the water. The CT man also had a neighbor who was an accomplice and was waiting out there.

      I wake up in a hospital in Connecticut. The doctor – a female – goes and tells me that police somehow got my father’s number (even though I was unconscious) and called up my father and he said “he is bipolar.” I remember asking how did they get my father’s number, I did not have it on me, they said they got it from my license. Which does not make sense. The doctor, though, who was the same one who told me that “police watched you for an hour on the water” told me my father said I was bipolar, and she said “but I can tell, you don’t seem bipolar, you are calm.” I wonder if she was warning me or something.

      However, I note, let’s play devil’s advocate and pretend that cops were not up to something really dirty. All the things I had done to elude what looked like an intentional covered-up murder were some of the craziest things anyone can do. And there I was, and you could see my legs covered with scratches from being in the water. The doctor didn’t even ask me why I ended up in the water or how I got those scratches or what the hell had happened. It was as if she kind of already knew, so it didn’t matter. No need to ask me.

      And, guess what? They didn’t pink slip me to a mental ward. They let me go nearly right away. That was another thing very ironic to how this whole mafia situation was handled. I was hospitalized so many times, and in all cases doctors covered up the crimes. However, SOMETIMES they go and act like “you have a serious mental health problem if this happened to you” and force me into a mental ward for one or even two weeks. In other cases, I get let go right away. And there was no rhyme or reason to it. In some of the instances where I was discharged right away, IF you were to say “this wasn’t the mafia, this was him having a mental health episode,” then the things I had just done were some of the craziest things a person could do. In other cases, where I get hospitalized for two weeks, I hadn’t done ANYTHING but they hospitalize me anyway. Oh yes and even the doctors hospitalizing me admitted to knowing about some of the crazy things the police HAD just done. “Oh yes, we know, they are like that sometimes.” Because the whole thing was rigged and this was just part of a pre-planned program I was being put through.

      Anyway, I wanted to post this because I thought I should include this. This is relevant. Relevant because, especially, Black Lives Matters has been making a big fuss about police shootings that are murders. What happened to me really helps prove just how pre-meditated these police shootings can be.

      I am not even all too anti-police, I should note, because I did not think the cops were bad men. It’s a big problem the corruption that hospitals engage in. You can’t trust a hospital to save the life of a cop who defied the mafia, and police sent him on some sort of emergency “call” to some crime scene, where he suddenly gets shot and shooter miraculously escapes and it remains forever an unsolved murder, and the hospital (playing dumb here) “just tried and tried and tried but couldn’t save him.” Hospitals commit murder too. Police who don’t obey can get killed too.

      Also, hospitals have access to the types of drugs that incentivize the street thugs who would be one of those who’d “take on” a cop who disobeyed the mafia. Also, another common problem is just how many illegal drug “overdoses” are really pre-meditated murders, and they wouldn’t have succeeded but for what the hospital did. There are so many illegal drug users and they are a huge army that outnumber the police substantially.

      If corruption among the rich, the super-rich, large corporations, universities and other charities and government agencies is not taken on, how can you expect police to not also be trapped in the same web of corruption? They are just one tiny little cog in a very big wheel. The biggest factor, I believe, is the massive outpouring of wealth from the top, in the form of systematic bribes.

    • Oh now I remember what else I wanted to say before, but it slipped my mind because the very process of recollecting what happened with those cops on that seashore in Connecticut aggravated my memory repression issues.

      Notice how these intended deaths were to be drug overdoses or justifiable homicide shootings, wherein it’s all covered up by portraying me I guess as a menacing person or something like that. E.g., a dangerous perpetrator type.

      Well, the interesting thing about the mafia is they are super practical about stuff. Many years previously, what was the “threat” that some people levied against me? Around 1998 when certain problems I was having at Harvard were “coming to a head” so to speak, I became a subject of repeated warnings that I need to watch out not to become a victim of a Matthew Shepard style hate crime. And I am a very big strong and muscular person too. I was always wondering “why me?” This was when I first started cruising at this cruisy park in Boston.

      And I once did indeed have a problem with several drunk college kids parking their car surrounding mine and then acting threateningly for awhile — but I was able to stave them off.

      This was all around the time of the Matthew Shepard “hate crime” murder, and then once that murder happened, it all stopped and never happened again. Even some Harvard students went and did things to hint at knowing that I’d been at the fens (that’s the name of the cruisy park), which is where I was repeatedly warned.

      I even have a threatening email from the President of the Harvard Organ Society, which he timed literally to coincide EXACTLY with Matthew Shepard actually dying. (He was in a hospital for awhile before he died).

      Here he writes, and I copy and paste:

      “Date: Mon, 12 Oct 1998 21:50:56 -0400 (EDT)
      From: Seth Moulton
      To: Damian Schloming
      Subject: organ society

      Dear Damian,

      I just wanted to take a moment to get in touch with you regarding your
      place in HROS. Although we’ve barely talked at all this year, I have
      heard of your problems with The Memorial Church. I certainly don’t
      intend to take sides in any disputes you may have, but I hope that you can
      put them aside and still be a member of the Organ Society. With your
      diligent work and wonderful playing, your contribution is not something I
      would like to miss.

      That said, I do think, however, that you should actively try to
      straighten-out your relationship with The Memorial Church or at least with
      Murray. Perhaps there have been more recent developments, but last I heard
      you missed an appointment for lunch to do just that. Unfortunately, it
      seems that it’s a situation you must deal with; everyone can’t just forget
      about it.

      Please be in touch if I can be of any help, and I’m hoping to see you at
      our meeting next Monday. Hopefully you’ll be able to play at Halloween as
      well!?

      -Seth”

      ——–

      It so happens to be the case that there was no appointment ever scheduled for lunch in the first place. However, I happened to go to the fens when Matthew Shepard was murdered — I was initially TOLD about that murder AT the fens, by a man whose tone I still remember because he said it in this very weird way, almost as if to tantalize or intimidate.

      So I stayed up late, and this caused me to oversleep and not see that email. Either that or the Harvard computer center went and slipped that email in later on, back dating it to coincide, and that’s why I didn’t notice that email until months later, when I go over my correspondence from the past. (They WERE that corrupt at Harvard regarding fudging of the records).

      The Matthew Shepard murder is also something where it’s been publicly exposed that the official narrative is bogus, and I know that the vast majority of gay men do not believe the official narrative and wouldn’t. If you really ARE gay, and this involves the politicized murder of a gay man, survival instinct is not compatible with believing in a bogus narrative. Some people might pretend to believe for the sake of others. Privately, you do what you know works best to protect yourself.

      Anyway, I had wanted to include this point about Matthew Shepard in my above comment on the CT incident involving the potential shooting. And it slipped my mind and I was not able to remember, because that’s how my memory repression issues work and the CT incident was a very scary incident to remember. I finally just remembered it now.

      • One more thing I forgot to mention about the Connecticut incident which eventually resulted in them rescuing me from the water. The way it was, I was terrified — well, they didn’t announce themselves for an hour but just waited silently for an hour before abruptly coming to the water to rescue me and lighting up five strobe lights all at once too. Which they had set up super quietly in the dark.

        Btw, I thought about it and did wonder, maybe they were trying a “justifiable homicide” murder and then when I started yelling “help help” and started thrashing around in the water, perhaps they thought it was a shark or something. Somehow felt if they didn’t rescue me right then, or if they let me drown, that would just not look good for some reason.

        Not sure. But, anyway, afterwards, well first of all when they got to me the injected something right away that put me straight to sleep. I wake up in the hospital and the doctor says, first, that “they watched you for an hour before coming to rescue you” and then she said that “they said you said you were to swim away from the shore to escape the mafia” or something like that. This was Milford, CT so apparently they were accusing me of having said to them that I had planned to swim from Milford, CT to Long Island.

        I, of course, told her that was nonsense.

        This doctor was good in the sense of kind of indicating she didn’t believe any of the others, she believed me. It was as if she was kind of warning me, she found all of their stories inconsistent and knew I was calm and in my right mind. But in a very cool and subtle way.

        However, I do note, all the information is consistent with cops, after having watched me for a whole hour, having to pretend I’d swum away from shore only to swim back, I guess, so as to perhaps explain why they had taken so long.

        All I can say is, the facts are consistent with an attempted pre-meditated “justifiable homicide.” But, I mean, if this is the mafia and Harvard’s involved and etc. etc. etc., one could still speculate: was this to manipulate me into getting the second attorney?

        Anyway, the circumstantial evidence all adds up and fits a “justifiable homicide” interpretation. Including why they felt they had to say something to cover up why they were waiting that long.

  2. DEADLY FORENSICS IN THE UK

    Though by the age of 61 I have never broken the law, I was allocated a Forensic Psychiatrist at the London Maudsley Hospital in 1980. His name was Dr DC Mawson, who went on to look after gangster Ronnie Kray in 1995 (at the time of his death).
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kray_twins

    I don’t believe I had ever met Dr DC Mawson. Most of my contact had been with his assistant a Dr Barry Stone who died on the 11th of October 1999 at 51 years of age as a result of injuries sustained in a house fire on October 9th 1999.

    BMJ Obituary Dr Barry Stone by Dr S Lieberman
    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1117166/

    Dr Barry Stones Grave
    https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/214245905/barry-leonard-stone

    Dr S Lieberman was suspended from practising Medicine by the GMC within 6 months of the writing of this Obituary:-
    “..Doctor banned for prostitute advice..”
    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/712614.stm

    Also within 6 months of Dr Barry Stones death – the doctor (now a Psychiatrist in a neighbouring County) that copied my History & Formulation at Galway Southern Ireland in 1980 from Dr Barry Stone…

    https://www.theargus.co.uk/news/5143048.amp/

    …was banned by the UK GMC from Practising medicine due to “Gross Misconduct” (though it is possible that this doctor had left the UK before any charges were brought against him).

    I had mixed socially in Amsterdam in 1980 at Barndesteeg 21, 1012 BV Amsterdam, with a chap that bears a strong resemblance to …

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kevin_McGrady

    ..who had been concerned about a conversation we were supposed to have had, that I couldn’t place. I believe my heavy duty treatment had been as a result of this – there was ‘No Amsterdam’ anywhere on my UK Medical Records.

  3. The Ghosts of the Civil Dead.

    “Aye, i’m talkin ta you. Now ya put us in a cage, a cage for an animal. Don’t you know that a long period of incarceration, without proper medical diet, breeds psychosis. Ya know what psychosis is? It makes one become predatory, compulsive. Do ya know what your doing here? Do Ya? You are creating a lot of angry men is what you are doing. And one day, those men are going to go out there, and that day, those people out there are going to pay for what your doing in here. You remember that. That day you are going to pay”

    Don’t know if you’ve seen the movie Mr Gunderson, but well worth the effort.

    There was some ‘debate’ (is it really a debate when it’s a doctor versus anyone else? Your anosognosia means your wrong) on this site in a previous article regarding the comparison of “liasons” with “capos”, some taking offence at the comparison. Eat herring, expect bones (an old cat saying from Red Dwarf).

    Part of me is of the opinion that the people who actually suffer the most from such environments are actually those who are free to leave. At first their attitude to the place seems to be ‘it’s a good job’ etc. But whilst the inmates have no choice, imagine looking back over a 20 year career and saying that you had spent all that time in the place of your own volition? Whose insane now? In a similar manner to those who subject people to torture actually coming out of the situation worse than their victims. (see Frantz Fanon in this regard? As a victim of State sanctioned torture and cover up, the thought has been part of why I survived to this point)

    Opinion, not fact. Lots to be learned though for what is about to come into our lives on a global scale it would seem. Survival skills of this type may become a little more important than people actually realise. Given that in our communities, what was once seen as being desirable (we’ve got your back) is now a situation which is to be exploited (a knife in your back). Trust being one of the values in short supply.

    I wonder if you can see the changes since the time when you were incarcerated to now?

    Anyway, I look forward to more of your writing. Good luck.

  4. Additional

    You write;

    “Furthermore, the privacy of information enshrined in the Health Insurers Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA) will be largely irrelevant in these so-called hospitals.

    You will quickly see how important the free flow of certain “private” information is for the maintenance of an artificial culture, especially for a liaison. Fortunately, as you will have the perspective of an inmate, HIPAA will not apply to you, as it only applies to staff. As I give you a guided tour of a forensic psychiatric DC, I will use privacy in accordance with how a liaison and the staff would use it. That is, when it is strategic to conceal information, privacy can be invoked in a micro-narrative. However, if it is strategic to share otherwise private information, then I will do so.”

    “Only applies to staff”? This is not correct. I can give you a number of means to breach these types of laws which are not worth the paper they are written on. For example, a psychologist married to a psychiatrist obtains employment at a Private Clinic, accesses private and confidential medical records at that establishment, and then through ‘pillow talk’ releases that private information, which is now public knowledge. (protection of ‘spousal privilege’ means the law can not be applied. Information released and the two parties will refuse to testify on the grounds of self incrimination. Not worth the paper they are written on, but a really good way to get people to say things they otherwise wouldn’t [respect for your privacy? “Trust in haste, regret at leisure”]. And then combined with the way such documents are often ‘verballed’ anything becomes the truth. Amazing to find out that your 12 year old child who committed suicide was accusing you of sexual abuse when you get access to the documents. And it does mean your reluctant to make any further complaint because …. well, you wouldn’t want that coming out at trial would you? Ever seen such ‘coercive measures’ used Mr G? I’d be surprised if you hadn’t. Not that it’s true, just that they put that there in case it should be needed at a later time. eg should you complain about the ‘treatment’ that resulted in the death.)

    Similarly, lawyers make application for documents they have a right to access, and instead receive documents which have been “edited”, and which include documents not requested, and which have been included for the sole purpose of character assassination.

    What people think is covered under our Privacy Act can be easily breached, and hardly ever is anything done about these Federal offences. The good thing about it is that should the person who has been the victim of such confidentiality breaches complain, they actually spread the poison of the breach even further. The slander and back biting will take care of the rest.

    Staff are protected by law? Not if the State wishes to ‘fuking destroy’ them and their families. Their “edited” medical records will be distributed far and wide. I found something particularly painful which I had discussed more than ten years earlier with a Social Worker included in documents provided when the lawyers had requested ONLY documents from a certain date included in the “edited” legal narrative. And they were fully aware that I was not a “patient” and had every right to be asked if I consented to the release….. but slandering people with such information given in confidence (and taken in good faith by others with no evil intent) is just so effective when you are given the authority by the State to fuking destroy a victim of torture, who is pointing out your duty to report public sector misconduct.

    Best you keep silent when the State is enabling torture and arbitrary detentions, or even as staff (or someone with human rights) your medical records will be released…….. sorry, there was a terrible mistake, we will try harder…honest.

    And those defenders of our rights? Well, i’m sure we can go through their records and dig up some dirt. Surely they have said something during the ‘confessional’? And they are witness to the fuking destrution of others which I feel sure they do not wish to be subjected to themselves, so ……I guess you would hear the words I heard of “it never happened” from someone who personally witnessed the truth. Self preservation is paramount when police are threatening your family. Not so easy for staff in the real world either. And here comes the bus to run you over ….. (shove)

    • So staff could and are subjected to the unlawful release of confidential information for ‘political’ reasons, just as much as ‘patients’ I would suggest.

      And the ways of achieving this are many and varied.

      Incapacitating someone by ‘spiking’ their drink with date rape drugs, thus they are not capable of consenting to the release of their confidential records, and that decision can now be made by someone with a conflict of interest, the self appointed ‘carer’. And once in custody, a prescription can be written to make the drugs used to ‘spike’ them with their “regular medications”. Compounding of offences (trick cycling in criminal argot) basically.

      So my medical records which were court sealed, end up being handed on to the Senior Medical Officer (from the Private Clinic) who wrote the prescription for the date rape drugs which had been used to incapacitate me. “looks like a criminal conspiracy” said one Senior Constable, who then tried to arrest me for having my medical records and the proof.

      In the other direction, it is also possible to commit criminal offences to conceal medical records from people who have a right to access them. So for example, the FOI Officer did not want me (or God forbid the Law Centre) to gain access to the crimes committed by the Community Nurse (create false belief, procure person not suffering from mental illness). So she pretended that I was a “patient” and maintained that she was therefore permitted to conspire with my ‘carer’ to deny access to my documents, whilst they arranged to have me sign documents that would make what they wanted to be true, a reality. ie have me made into a “patient’ post hoc, which then allows them to conspire to conceal their conspiring.

      Sounds confusing right? And it’s fascinating observing whilst the ‘watchdog’ authorities look like a 5 year old trying to put together a life size replica of the Sydney Harbour Bridge. Instead preferring to do cover ups, and fuking destroy victims. Which to me is a fairly good explanation as to why our hospital system is in the absolute mess it is in, and why career criminals would be better getting medical degrees, and save the money being paid for legal advice.

      Mind you, I make it sound easy and it isn’t. You need to be really careful if anyone who understands the ‘system’ actually spots what your doing, and lets you run with it. And then just at the critical moment …….. Possible to drive people absolutely insane? When the ‘world’ starts collapsing in on them? You just deal with one cover up, and another appears to be dealt with? And another? And another? And all the while your fearful fo being exposed because ……. they simply wouldn’t understand why you needed to do what you’ve done right? It all seemed so easy at the start, commit the offence, and make it look like it was someone else.

      My heart goes out to such people, who, lacking a heart couldn’t possibly have any empathy for my plight.

      So who is worse off? The ‘patient’ who is fully aware that they have no human or civil rights? Or the person being targeted by the organised criminals who are being enabled in ‘working the system’? Don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone, or living in fear of losing what you think you have. The old adage about terrorism seems appropriate, kill one to scare a thousand (see the story about Sun Tzu and the Emperor of Wu). Hardly effective if the results are not seen by those who need to be ‘coerced’ into behaving in a certain manner. Though it does need to be ‘coded’ by the use of euphemisms etc.

      “political language has to consist largely of euphemism, question-begging and sheer cloudy vagueness. Defenceless villages are bombarded from the air, the inhabitants driven out into the countryside, the cattle machine-gunned, the huts set on fire with incendiary bullets: this is called pacification. Millions of peasants are robbed of their farms and sent trudging along the roads with no more than they can carry: this is called transfer of population or rectification of frontiers. People are imprisoned for years without trial, or shot in the back of the neck or sent to die of scurvy in Arctic lumber camps: this is called elimination of unreliable elements. Such phraseology is needed if one wants to name things without calling up mental pictures of them.”

      (Orwell on Political Language)

      Hence we have reports of “unintended negative outcomes” in the forensic unit, rather than “his neck was snapped during a restraint by staff”.

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