Mental health and mental illness (in the abstract, without ever being clearly defined) are discussed far more than the abusive conditions which often create the suffering that lasts a lifetime.
Recently in a support group I’m part of, a young woman spoke of being whipped with belts by her parents. My shut down heart woke up and felt something.
Since I was a child, child abuse has been a subject of my subconscious interest. As a kid I had recurring dreams of children of different races than my own being hit and abused by their parents. This was the most common type of dream I had.
My own home life included violence towards the children, and growing up in New York City where I took public transportation daily as a teenager, I often witnessed child abuse in public. But not just on the subway.
At the ice skating rink I saw a woman smack her son for being in the “wrong area.” I then witnessed her saying to him, “I’m sorry I hit you,” on the bench next to me as I took off my sneakers and put on my ice skates.
I saw my friends in my drama class get smacked by their mom in the hallway, and another family friend nurse a bloody nose after his mom hit him, on the front stairs to their house, in front of everyone.
A lot of blood and fascia move around my body as I recount these “small” incidents. A lot of blood and fascia is stagnated in my being that got frozen in terror when the physical assault of children happened in my own family.
I can feel that on a level of cause and effect, the abuse of children that I experienced firsthand and second hand, and still experience residually and vicariously, has led to most of the suffering I have experienced as an adult.
That’s a pretty bold statement to make in a culture that blames the suffering on mental health problems and prescribes pills to check out of the pain. Yet in my blood and breath, it’s one thing I know very well to be true.
Writing about children being hit or whipped is the most cathartic thing I can think of. (It also terrifies me.)
This is because a big part of the abuse was the silencing and subsequent distraction.
After abuse in my own family, there often followed love and generosity. While these gestures had elements of honesty, they were also control and silencing mechanisms.
As an older sibling of divorced and suffering parents, I was far too protective of my parents to break the code of silence about the violence they inflicted.
This silence has eaten away at me my whole life. It has ruined my life; it has led to all kinds of addictive behaviors to check out of that pain, the pain of children being hit by adults. The layers of shame and guilt that get buried deep underneath mental health diagnoses, pills, health problems, addictions or simply unhappy adults who spend their days escaping in one way or another.
The medical and psychiatric systems often aid and abet this abuse. Psychiatrists don’t ask who was hitting who and how often in your family. Medical doctors surely don’t, even though child abuse has been shown to lead to chronic illness.
These questions would largely put them out of business and invalidate their industries. These questions would make a mockery of their many years of schooling and many prescription pad options.
These questions would heal. They would bring us back together with the truth of who we are, who we were, who we could have been if we had not lived with chronic fear, shaming and physical assault.
Psychiatrists have a long way to go in atoning for these malpractices. Numbing the brain of a person who was chronically hit and yelled at as a child is a great way to create the kind of society we are living in now, one where more and more people are able to pretend to be “okay” but very few feel even close to good.
As long as we are protecting abuse practices and keeping old stories of family unity and the mentally ill outcast who has a chemical imbalance for some unknown reason, well, we’ve kept the shelf on its hinges.
This is a great way to keep the chains of abuse locked: don’t talk about the abuse, call it a mental illness, take drugs, protect the abusers.
This sends the message that abusers are protected by society and the victims of abuse are subject to further abuse by psychiatry, so the most important thing is to have the upper hand.
Of course most abusers have been hit themselves. The cycle goes on, until a true psychiatry (literally: medicine of the soul/psyche) emerges, puts down its tools of silencing and advocates for us all to speak out about who hit us, when, where and how often. And what were they saying or shouting when they did so?
And are they the same people invested in creating a diagnostic distraction to point the spotlight away from their crime?
The truth will set us free.
Abusers retain guilt for their blows and either feel it or, more likely, check out themselves. Facilitating dialogue and amends-making processes would bring consciousness to these dynamics. It would be liberating for all parties.
It would be a true psychiatry.
Mad in America hosts blogs by a diverse group of writers. These posts are designed to serve as a public forum for a discussion—broadly speaking—of psychiatry and its treatments. The opinions expressed are the writers’ own.
“These questions would heal. They would bring us back together with the truth…” is an extremely articulate description of causation for most “mental health” problems. Psychiatry is currently deemed a medical science and thereby advocates that “mental health” problems are medical problems rather than social problems; this obscures the truth and thereby worsens “mental health” problems.
Yes. “Mental illness is nobody’s fault. Not your fault your ‘loved’ one is an irredeemable monster. So it doesn’t matter if you hit him.”
Yetanotheraccount, yes the mythology we are told.
Thanks Steve. I absolutely agree.
Yes, I did not experience much violence as a child but I have listened to those in the mental health system who have. Their histories were ignored by psychiatry and their distress drugged.
Not all child abuse is physical. Ever have a Sunday School teacher call you a “wicked child” at age 4 and describe Hell in detail? You could avoid the Inferno by being a cheerful, obedient child who never bothered your parents by crying.
Yetanotheraccount- for sure, there are all kinds of emotional and mental abuse children endure as well, and again the “blame” for their reaction is falsely placed on some kind of yet to be discovered mental imbalance.
Sadly my younger brother and I experienced similar problems. The teacher never said anything I remember about Divine love. My parents were troubled and mystified when Bro and I would stay up at night crying because we were scared of dying and going to Hell. Years later we told them. We thought that woman was right in her behavior and Dad and Mom knew what she was teaching.
That must have been scary yetanotheraccount.
Abuse – yes, I endured emotional and some physical abuse as a child. I experienced more – substantially more – as a inmate in the L.A. County jail – and then the lawyers I was given could best be described as generally being between callous and deprived indifferent. Abuse has been integrated into our system of government – and denying and covering up abuse has become common. Len Downie Jr, in his 1973 book, Justice Denied (self-published in Great Britain) claims the plea bargain system began in New York City, shortly after Miranda v. Arizona (384 U.S. 436; 1966). At the time, many attorneys refused to use it, considering it unethical. At first, it was used solely in the most serious cases. However, in 1982 Los Angeles began using it routinely. The conviction rate soared from 81% in 1981 to 98.6% in 1988, falling to only 96% in 1997 when the State of California stopped publishing The California Criminal Justice Profile. It is at least possible that publication stopped due to the letters I sent to various elected and non-elected officials in both Los Angeles and Sacramento.
While Gideon v. Wainwright (372 U.S. 335; 1963) established the right to an attorney for indigent defendants, Miranda expanded when an attorney would be required as well as spawning many concerns such as inadequate funding and training of attorneys, excessive workloads and conflicts of interest. In my book, Liberty and Mental Health – You Can’t Have One Without the Other, I make arguments against Miranda, as well as Frazier v. Cupp (394 U.S. 731; 1969) which permits police to lie to the public just about any time they want, Imbler v. Pachtman (424 U.S. 409; 1976) which encourages malicious prosecutions and Bordenkircher v. Hayes (434 US 357; 1978) which permits the prosecutor to blackmail defendants. – Then there is Economics – Did you realize that catastrophes work to increase GNP – which every politician will tell you is good for the economy and the American people. That is because only the money that goes into the affected area is counted – the losses from the destruction isn’t. (See Buddhist Economics by Clair Brown for more on this) Additionally Geoffrey Heal, in his book – Endangered Economies: How the Neglect of Nature Threatens Our Prosperity, however argues that the need is to return to capitalist fundamentals where the true cost of products and services need to be factored in, including environmental costs. His main focus is on externalities – situations whereby actions impose a cost, yet the cost isn’t taken into account. He contends that we in the cities have gotten so far away from the natural world which we are totally dependent that we will see catastrophic environmental change unless changes are made to our economic systems. Like it or not, we are the cutting edge which has the potential to lead the world (especially the U.S.) back to sanity. More about this in my new play – Sugar Daddies – Rehearsals to start in a week or so.
Thanks mhadvocate. Yes abuse definitely has been integrated into our systems of government.
“The medical and psychiatric systems often aid and abet this abuse.” They absolutely do, today “the prevalence of childhood trauma exposure within borderline personality disorder patients has been evidenced to be as high as 92% (Yen et al., 2002). Within individuals diagnosed with psychotic or affective disorders, it reaches 82% (Larsson et al., 2012).” Silencing child abuse victims is, hands down, the number one function of today’s psychiatric industry.
“Psychiatrists don’t ask who was hitting who and how often in your family. Medical doctors surely don’t, even though child abuse has been shown to lead to chronic illness.” And they outright deny child abuse that occurs outside the home. Why?
“These questions would largely put them out of business and invalidate their industries.” Yes, if the psychiatric industry got out of the business of drugging up child abuse victims to silence and disorient them, which is a form of gas lighting a person, which is a known form of mental abuse not mental health care, they would lose about 90% of their business.
But we could decrease the rate of those psychiatrically claimed to be “mentally ill” by about 90%, merely by getting the psychiatric industry out of the illegal business of aiding and abetting child abusers and molesters, especially if our society started actually arresting child molesters again as well.
But, alas, today’s American psychiatric child abuse covering up system is a multibillion dollar industry. And unfortunately Western civilization has apparently been totally taken over by fiscally irresponsible, globalist, “luciferian” child sacrificing banksters (“the borrower is slave to the lender”).
“A society will be judged on the basis of how it treats its weakest members,” our current Western civilization is in for a harsh judgement.
Thanks someoneelse. Well put.
To me the word psychiatry itself is abuse. It is the blind from birth cyclops ,unleashed by the oligarchs upon the people including the children. It is a form of virulent unregulated, government owned by oligarchs ,systematic abuse . The blog rings with truth everyone should know,and too many of us have experienced, but advocating that some variety of psychiatry , a reformed psychiatry, a “true psychiatry” (an oxymoron if I ever heard one) is the answer, is false and it seems could only be put forth in this manner by someone that does not actually understand the psychiatric industry.Apologies yes, reparations yes , kindness and friendship yes , jail sentences yes, payback yes , no more child abuse tolerated , no more wars for Oligarch profit, no more coercion,no more oppression, and no more psychiatry.
“The cycle goes on, until a true psychiatry (literally: medicine of the soul/psyche) emerges, puts down its tools of silencing and advocates for us all to speak out about who hit us, when, where and how often.”
The word psychiatry means medicine or healing/treatment of the soul. The “reformed psychiatry” is the one we see now-corrupted by all the things you mention.
” For every human being is part of the single soul that is the spirit of the universe.” ( The Thirteen Petalled Rose by Adin Steinsaltz )
I read your blog again and followed the link by your picture (coaching people coming off psychiatric drugs).Seems you are, in a sense occupying psychiatry , being and living the change you want to see happen, using your considerable understanding and your talents without compromise . You are very brave and we are very fortunate to have you blogging here. The help you offer to people is priceless.
The actual quote in The Thirteen Petalled Rose by Adin Steinsaltz is “For every human being is a part of the single soul that is the spirit of the entire universe.”
That quote is a perfect example of why no one can be outcast as fundamentally “psychiatrically or psychologically ill”. How could any soul be a mistake that needs to be permanently drugged into compliance?
Thanks for checking out my work. I appreciate your recognition.
This is the ultimate truth that psychiatry and the drug companies have been empowered to cover up. And it’s not just parents – our social institutions are very responsible for abuse, physical and emotional. Churches and schools promote fear of authority. In my case, this included being hit and sent out of the classroom in second grade for speaking up when the teacher tossed a book across the room in a rage, as well as being laughed at and abandoned in a hallway by a Sunday school class at the age of 4. These are only the more obvious manifestations. The maxim “It’s no one’s fault” was created to protect adults from responsibility for their hurtful behavior toward our society’s children, and also from becoming conscious of the fact that they were abused in the same way when they were kids.
Thanks for speaking the truth, Chaya, and eloquently!
Thanks Steve. Totally agree and well said. Yes, social and familial abuse go hand and hand. I read something really good about that recently that I will need to send you. It was about how Hitler was so severely abused and treated as subhuman by his family. It talked about how we often replicate the abuse we experience in our families and then expect/accept that treatment from society (or perpetuate it, depending on the level of socioeconomic power).
A lot of survivors of abuse in childhood go on to have abusive conditions at their jobs, but it just seems normal or comfortable as that was all they/we knew.
Sounds like Alice Miller’s work. She’s amazing if you’ve never read her. Totally gets the impact of even more diffuse trauma, like constantly getting the message you’re not living up to parental expectations, or being expected to emotionally care for a parent who is not specifically abusive but needy and self-centered. Of course, she has been ignored or castigated by the mainstream.That’s usually a sign you’re onto something, when the Powers that Be get upset with you!
Definitely a sign you’re onto something.
NAMI is not just a front for pharmaceutical companies. It also enables abusive parents and partners.
Not all NAMI family members are abusive. Some honestly want to help the loved one and don’t know another way.
They get discouraged when the loved ones deteriorate and all their friends at this group say is, “Make sure they keep taking their ‘meds!'” NAMI’s only solution to everything. As long as we die with our rights OFF everything’s hunky dorey.
Yetanotheraccount, thanks for your point about NAMI.
Chaya, you wrote, “These questions would heal. They would bring us back together with the truth of who we are, who we were, who we could have been if we had not lived with chronic fear, shaming and physical assault.”
I say you are completely off base.
Most child abuse is no longer physical. The people who hit children will usually end up being handled by law enforcement, one way or another.
The people who are above the law are the well off and educated. They read books. They consider themselves above those who hit children. They know what they can get away with and what will make them look good. When this fails, they open the Yellow Page and find a child therapist. The abuse is psychological.
Go to a big chain book store and look at the pedagogy manuals. They tell people to have children and often use the images of children to sell the book. Chlld exploitation is a huge business, and it caters to those educated and well off and who would never hit a child.
So they have children, as that makes themselves look good and maintains marital peace, just like buying a new car or a new washing machine or dryer.
So no one ever ‘heals’ from being used like this. How could anyone ever heal when they live in a world of continual abuse and denial. They are being further abused anytime anyone tells them about therapy and healing, or about forgiveness. Even the concepts of healing, therapy, and forgiveness are just more abuse being perpetrated on survivors.
If you live in a world based on lies, denial, and abuse, there are only two ways to go. Either you find ways to resist, fight back, and punish the perpetrators, or you decide that it is easier to collaborate with the perpetrators.
Hi Tirelessfighter. I disagree. Hitting children is commonplace and most people do not end up enforced by the law since hitting children is legal as long as it isn’t “severe” or leaving heavy bruises.
Are you saying well off educated people don’t hit children? That is simply not true.
It seems you didn’t read what I wrote about healing coming from NOT continuing to live in denial. That was the whole point.
Saying someone is completely off base and then not referring to what was actually written here isn’t helpful.
I agree with some of what you say at the end here about choosing not to collaborate with perpetrators…but that is not contradictory to what I wrote.
I am with Chaya. I have worked for many years with foster youth and I can say that hitting, beating, burning, sexual abuse are by no means restricted to the poor or working classes. That being said, I do agree, Tireless, that rich and middle class folks are often able to avoid the consequences of their violence and abuse, as they can afford to hire threatening attorneys, they live further away from neighbors and mandated reporters, and their status enables them to claim “I wouldn’t do something like that” with more credibility. That’s the nature of privilege.
I would also disagree with you that no healing can occur. It’s true, like any injury, that spiritual injuries leave a scar behind, but I have known many people who have made very workable lives for themselves and who have achieved a large degree of happiness and peace of mind despite abuse they experienced. It can never be like it never happened at all, but it is possible to find a way forward for many folks. I think each has their own path to get there, but don’t give up hope – it can and has been done!
Thanks Steve. You say this well and I completely agree. Some very powerful people like Oprah Winfrey come from abusive childhoods/backgrounds.
Steve McCrea, Thank you for replying. Yes, kids end up in foster care. And yes, all kinds of physical and sexual abuses occur. But the reason the kids end up in foster care is that our society knows that these things are WRONG.
But, foster care does not even deal with emotional abuse. And you are correct in explaining all the ways well off people can avoid the authorities.
But Steve, when you talk about the problem as one of healing, and describe these things as scars, and talk then about achieving happiness and peace of mind, your are making the same fundamental mistakes that Chaya is making, turning the problem back on the survivor.
These abuses, the physical, sexual, and psychological, are not aberrations. They are a built in part of our society and the middle class family. Most people realize that physical and sexual abuse are wrong. But most still accept psychological abuse because they don’t call it abuse. The middle-class family exists because people have children in order to use them.
So when you or Chaya talk about scars, and healing, and peace of mind and happiness, you are siding with the parents and promoting denial and continuing abuse.
No one heals from systemic abuses, and no one should try to. Talking about healing is just another layer of abuse.
If you live in an unjust world, your either find ways to resist and fight back, or you instead collaborate with the abusers, as you Steve and you Chaya are.
I never heard Steve or Chaya say emotional abuse was wonderful or that they thought Faye Dunnaway from Mommy Dearest was heroic.
We had another commenter who talked like you and kept ranting about the “law of primogeneteur.” He seemed to think we live in Regency England with the Bennett sisters.
If someone hits you with a car, and your leg is broken, is it invalidating to talk about your leg healing? Is it blaming the victim of the car crash to say, “Hey, if you set that bone and splint it, you will probably be able to walk normally again?” Does it make it like the bone was never broken? No. Does it mean you’re able to function better, even if you’re not back to 100%? Yes. Does it excuse the person who hit you with the car? Absolutely not. I am the last person in the world to blame children for the abusive behavior by their parents or by the system. I am simply saying that there are things that a person who is hurt can do to make their lives more livable. Part of that healing might very well involve taking political action to fight the systemic abuse of kids and others.. It often does. But healing does not, in my mind, imply even forgiveness of the abuse, and absolutely does not include blame of the person so harmed. It’s just a question of whether you have to sit on the road with your leg broken for ever, or to take action to help it mend after the trauma of the accident. Hope that makes things clearer.
Maybe some folks enjoy walking on broken legs, Steve. That way the pain can make them meaner than snakes so they can feel more motivated for revenge! 😀
I would rather feel better myself. Too iatrogenically sick for revenge right now.
No one said you can’t heal yourself! Go for it!
And when you talk about “powerful people like Oprah Winfrey”, you are again promoting denial, turning the problem back upon survivors, and making fitting into society the goal of life.
One thing good about Winfrey is that she did identify perpetrators publicly.
But how about people who have taken effective actions to hold perpetrators accountable, like for example the Attorney Sharey Karney, and then of course Patty Reagan Davis. The latter is one who was dealing with ‘only’ emotional abuse. So lots of people made verbal attacks against Davis. And Davis has had her own difficulties, but this did not stop her.
I guess Chalya and Steve would lecture her about healing, peace of mind, and happiness. Fortunately Davis did not listen to any people like either of you.
You two, what you put out is just like heroin. It is a lie, the idea that one can live a good life without taking redress in every possible available way.
Sure, punch pillows in your therapist’s office, but don’t ever do anything which could negatively impact perpetrators, you have to live up to your parents’ expectations. Even if they did somethings wrong, you still have to live up to the self-reliance ethic.
I hope neither of you are making money off of counseling sessions. And I ask, are either of you doing counseling sessions with children, cases where the child is not presently being represented by an attorney in court?
So I read your two above posts. Are you endorsing therapy, recovery, or healing? If you are then you are endorsing lies and denial. If someone has two broken legs then that is the way it is. But having survived societal abuses, no one can possible every heal because the source of those abuses is our society itself. If you are telling people that they need to heal, then you are telling them a lie, telling them that it is their awareness and honesty itself which are the problem.
When you live in an unjust world, you either find ways to fight back, or you become an accomplice abuser yourself.
Therapy, Recovery, and Healing are simply the survivors abusing each other, in order to be able to stay in denial themselves.
My two replies to Tina:
In finding ways to fight back one must be able to observe oneself and watch how anger can grow inside like a giant billowing storm cloud and then watch how it can subside . Anger can sometimes take on a life of its own and make a showing where it’s not really intended. Then innocent people can get hurt and a person, without wanting to , can become what they hate . Justice is important . Getting an apology and reparations would be helpful and are necessary . Resorting to violence except in self defence could be the continuation of an unwanted cycle. Didn’t someone say living well is the best revenge . Can relentlessly seeking revenge ruin a person’s chances to reach their full potential and use their talents in a positive way . My mother and father were both Holocaust Survivors .I could see how my father’s justified anger twisted him . I saw how when we made peace between each other how relieved and happy we both were. Yet my mother who endured even more, and told me that I went through a lot ( more than 40 years till I freed myself from psychiatry and big pharma ) It’s been 10 years free now. My mother reminded me often ,” Fred today is the first day of your life .”
We must fight for justice and human rights in the wisest way possible , not adding hurt on to ourselves , and in a way that can be sustained over the long haul in the company of friends, and allow ourselves to take a break when needed to tend to our own well being in ways of our own choosing. Also we need to understand there are many idea’s out there , and that the best ones come when we are relaxed and at peace with ourselves .
And right here we have Fred Abbe demonstrating for us exactly what the problem with psychotherapy and recovery are. Not at all coincidentally these are also the problems with religion, and psychotherapy has never been very far from that, supposedly a liberalized version of it judging by Freud.
An excessive fear of one’s own impulses and desires, believing that they are wrong. So if you feel anger, then you have a self-improvement project ahead of you in making that anger go away, instead of becoming aware that you need to act to correct the injustice which is causing the anger.
And instead of learning to use your anger, and learning what is effective, be it just issuing a verbal rebuke, or bit it fighting in a revolution, your are afraid to learn, afraid to try. Afraid of your own anger, defining that as the problem, just like Freud.
Now given that acting on your anger could kill innocent people, or you could get yourself killed, or into the very highest levels of trouble, it is essential that we all study and learn and find out what is effective, and then act.
But no, those influenced by psychotherapy, Freud, recovery, or religion will not act. They are afraid of their own feelings. They have been made this way, and this alone is their real sickness.
What else is it to be an adult than to act when needed?
Fortunately there have been some who have done so:
To Live And Die With Honor
But as long as we have therapy and recovery, the survivors of abuse will continue to abuse each other, finishing the job that the parents attempted, and promoting the same self-reliance ethic that the parents were committed to. After all there are very financially successful survivors such as Oprah Winfrey, and so we are to practice denial so that we can become like them.
The real crime committed by therapists and the recovery movement is simply that they harm people, they make them feel that they themselves are the problem, and they make them feel that the only way to redeem themselves is to practice so much denial that they are no longer capable of being angry anymore.
The anguish which most people feel on a daily basis is not the direct result of childhood abuses of long ago. Rather, it is the life affirming and very positive impulse arising from the compromised civil and social standing. Any time a survivor is told about therapy and recovery, that is further abuse. Any time a survivor is told about the Good Family and about new pedagogies, that is more abuse, as it is all based on lies and denial.
Really we are all survivors because we live in a world which is built on child exploitation. So it really divides down into those who support the exploitation and do so by preaching the new pedagogies, and those few of us who do not support it.
So we must make sure than when ever these therapists do any of the following that there are legal consequences for the therapist:
1. Forced procedures
3. ECT, Lobotomy etc.
4. Acting on children who are not currently being represented by an attorney in court. These have to be considered forced procedures, and being an accomplice to the parents, because the therapist has zero authority over the parent, and so they are aiding in child sacrifice.
” living well is the best revenge ”
That’s the best cop out. It is also a lie. When your social and civil standing are seriously compromised, the only way you can regain that standing is by taking effective action and vanquishing foes. You either fight, or you become an Uncle Tom.
The abuses of the middle-class family continue 365 days per year. Our society is run by those who preach the Good Family, and usually make lots of money from this. They get to walk all over anyone who doesn’t practice the same denial and child exploitation systems they do.
And we get walked on when we are lectured to about therapy and recovery, and about how our anger is wrong. And we are walked on because our lives don’t look like the lives of those who have practiced denial and abused survivors.
The way we restore our social and civil standing is by demonstrating prowess in how we vanquish foes.
I helped put one perpetrator in prison. That has given me more social and civil standing than I have ever had in my entire life. And in so doing I also discredited a number of psychotherapists and a church, as they were on the side of the perpetrator.
Now I am engaged in political conflicts at the ground level on a daily basis. My foes are powerful, but I am slowly winning, and I am gaining social legitimacy on a daily basis.
If I went the lies and denial route, I would be in my therapist’s office punching pillows and screaming at them, making ritual testimony to my own impotence, until I was so numb I could not feel anything. I would be then what my parent’s, and what all parents, what their child to be.
The most important step at this point is to rally survivors committed to zero tolerance for psychotherapy, life coaching, motivationalism, or salvation seeking, and instead for reparations for the survivors and penalties for the perpetrators. And therapists, life coaches, and motivationalists are most definitely perpetrators.
“not adding hurt on to ourselves”
In most cases this is impossible, believing it is just another part of the denial.
We live in an unjust world, a world committed to denial, and a world committed to abusing survivors with therapy, recovery, and more lies.
So just like most all people who are born into wars, we either fight, and maybe die, or we become collaborators.
“Resorting to violence except in self defence could be the continuation of an unwanted cycle.”
Always reasons for not acting. Remember, I have not specifically advocated violence. You Fred Abbe are the one who talks about it. I suspect that this is because you know that violence is being done to survivors everyday, and you don’t want to deal with it.
Therapy and recovery are based on lies and abuse, on making survivors believe that they are the problem. This creates an economic underclass who are subjected to all manner of violence every day. This underclass is then attacked using social darwinist and eugenic arguments. Our entire economic system runs on these kinds of arguments.
Harriet Tubman had been committed to non-violence. Even John Brown had been committed to non-violence.
Martin Luther King did not understand Gandhi, except maybe during the last year of his life. King went on thinking that non-violence was about claiming moral superiority. He did not understand that Gandhi’s doctrine of satyagraha, meaning applying pressure, meant creating problems, forcing the other side to act, and likely violently. Gandhi talked about non-violence while in an extreme explosive mix of violence ready to erupt at any time. As Cornell West put it, for Gandhi, non-violence was a tactic, not a strategy.
“I don’t know whether or not my men can kill”
“Getting an apology and reparations would be helpful and are necessary . ”
The apology is almost impossible, and meaningless. Most of the time you’ll be dealing with people who are senile and suicidal. They want you to kill them.
But reparations could be. The United States is just about the only industrialized nation where it is possible for a parent to disinherit their child.
“the best ones come when we are relaxed and at peace with ourselves .” And yes, this is the major mind fuck perpetrated against survivors.
We must start with zero tolerance for Therapy, Life Coaching, Motivationalism, and Salvation Seeking, and by getting legal action against such where ever possible.
Nothing hurts one more than failure to act where action is clearly called for.
Right now today, someone is being worked on by therapists, psychiatrists, and prayer warriors, all accomplices of the parents, and the results are as you would expect:
Removed for moderation
TirelessFighter3, Ground control to Major Tom :
You presume a lot about people that is not accurate, but you also make some important points. Your ideas that all middle class families should be broken up sounds weird to me . I can’t spend the time it would take to teach you stuff , may you grow understanding . I read all 25 or so comments you’ve made here at MIA. Before you start judging me feel welcome to read at least all of the over 800 comments of mine . You may really learn something by doing that. Basically I’m Anti-Psychiatry and for HealthFreedom that ensures for the individual the inalienable right to accept or reject for themselves any type of care from anywhere on the planet. I’ve probably been fighting against psychiatry, to the best of my ability in my own way for longer than you’ve been alive . Best Wishes, Check Out https://www.YuenMethod.com
“middle class families should be broken up sounds weird to me ”
I never said that. Like everything else you’ve tried to direct at me, your statements are completely off base.
Yes, another feel good site!
More people who refuse to stand up and reclaim their social and civil standing, and instead opt for feel goods, which more children and survivors are abused.
I thank G-D I was able to learn directly from the most effective energy healer that I know of on the planet , Dr. Kam Yuen D C and learned directly from Dr.Joseph Liss N D the most effective Traditional Naturopath I ever met and that I taught myself Homeopathy, and so much more in fields that first do no harm . I’m thankful I was treated by Scott McAdoo DDS a Hal Huggins DDS trained dentist after which I was able to completely come off any psychiatric “care” or “meds” of any kind. I Feel Good . People need the space and freedom to follow their own path. https://nationalhealthfreedom.org
If you live in an unjust world, you either find ways of fighting back, or you just become a collaborator.
I stand with those who have fought back, like in the Warsaw Ghetto. They lived and they died with honor.
Talking about ‘healing’, is just a way of further abusing survivors. The survivor does not have any healing to do. They feel distress because their social and civil standing has been trashed. They should feel distressed as their survival is being threatened.
Once they are able to fight back and make some gains, they fill feel exuberant. Believe me, I know.
Telling people that they need healing will must make them more tuned out and more distressed. They could even end up killing themselves, like Matthew Warren, 27yo, youngest child of Rick and Kay Warren of the Saddleback Church.
I stand with and for survivors, and this means taking definite actions to fight back, and practicing zero tolerance with anyone who preaches therapy, life coaching, motivationalism, or healing.
Feeling exuberant seems like a “healing” experience to me!
So Yoko, you see that I don’t go along with the denial systems which underlie psychotherapy, recovery, and life coaching, and so you try to impugn me? You think that because this is online instead of f2f that you can do that?
Still involved with the mental health, therapy, recovery system? Oh no! What I am saying is that all any of them do is turn a survivor’s experience of injustice into a self improvement project. It all works rather like the religious concept of Original Sin.
And the homeless, these are some of the most severely abused people in our society. There is no such thing as mental illness, there is merely justice for survivors which has been long delayed.
Robert Whittaker has written some great books. He shows how the so called ‘mental illness’ epidemic is created by the psychiatric system and its medications. I for one don’t need to read a book to see that. But his books nevertheless are extremely important for convincing those who still don’t get it.
I did not though see anything in his books which endorsed the idea of therapy or recovery?
And it is unfortunate that this forum has long been taken over by people who avoid facing the truth in their experience by letting therapists and the recovery movement convince them that the problem lies within themselves. I have seen nothing in Whittaker’s writings which supports this. It is only on this forum, as it is on most all Recovery Forums, that people seem to believe this, and are often profiting from it.
And Steve, feeling exuberant is great. Lots of people get that with things like heroin and ethanol. Denial produces this, and this is why people go for denial, they are addicted to the emotional high. It might even by something like the endorphins which opiates mimic.
But some people also get it from simply the knowledge that though justice has been delayed, eventually, working with others, they will be able to obtain justice.
Telling people that the problem lies within themselves, and it is because they are ‘angry’, or ‘carrying things around with them’, or ‘fixated on the past’, is simply another layer of abuse, and a very severe one. And in fact, online is one of the most dangerous venues because people will try to abuse in ways which they know not to try f2f.
Hardly any of the ‘symptoms’ of psychological distress may correctly be seen as medical matters. The so-called psychiatric ‘disorders’ are nothing to do with faulty biology, nor indeed are they the outcome of individual moral weakness or other personal failing. They are the creation of the social world in which we live, and that world is structured by power.
Social power may be defined as the means of obtaining security or advantage, and it will be exercised within any given society in a variety of forms: coercive (force), economic (money power) and ideological (the control of meaning). Power is the dynamic which keeps the social world in motion. It may be used for good or for ill.
One cannot hope to understand the phenomena of psychological distress, nor begin to think what can be done about them, without an analysis of how power is distributed and exercised within society. Such an understanding is the focus of this web-site.
The ability to abuse survivors, by telling them about healing, forgiveness, and other forms of denial, is an exercise of power. It can be done f2f, like in the therapist’s office, or it can be one online. Either way it produces distress.
I am not aware that Robert Whittaker ever does this in any of his books. But in online forums, like this one, it is endemic because people are attached to their denial systems. And often this is most extreme in therapists, life coaches, motivationalists, pedagogues, and clergy.
When someone sees that they are being marginalized, they will feel distress. This is not a moral or medical failing on their part. It is an evolutionarilly developed response when one’s life is being placed at risk.
The way survivors can prevent marginalization is not by learning to practice lies and denial and to abuse other survivors. No, the way is by organizing and standing up for themselves. And a great place to start is by exposing therapists, life-coaches, etc, and exposing all the denial systems in play, and all the ways that the vulnerable, like children and survivors are being preyed upon.
And then of winning justice, even in limited form, there is no exuberance like that. In fact, there is nothing which opens life doors, like finally through hard effort being able to obtain justice against oppressors.
Tireless fighter, I get your point and it has some validity. Yet, if you look for everything to be “therapy, healing, life coaching and motivationalism” you can make any simple human act of striving to survive or live well into your idea of a demon.
People are doing their best and sometimes have the time/energy/resources to fight and other times are doing what they can to survive and live their lives the best way they can.
As Steve said, living well is the best revenge. Your point that taking action is necessary is valid though.
I do appreciate where you are coming from, and agree that systemic injustice is at the root of it all and denying that will not “heal” anything. So thanks for your relentless belaboring of this point.
It was also the direction of this article, which had nothing to do with therapy, life coaches etc etc. but rather acknowledging the injustice and addressing it.
We likely have different strategies, since I don’t tend to believe in violent retaliation, though many have the impulse for revenge.
“simple human act of striving to survive or live well into your idea of a demon”
If someone’s social and civil standing have been nullified, then they should and will feel distress, and likely anger. People need to restore their ability to trust their own feelings.
Therapy, life-coaching, motivationalism, and talk about healing are con games, they are telling people not to trust their own feelings, but instead to listen to an ideology of denial. They are being told that they should learn to live without complaint in an unjust world.
In France such a person would be called a collaborator. Because we in the US have a different history, such a person is called an Uncle Tom.
Uncle Toms are hated, and with good reason. The people who are respected are those like Frederick Douglas, Nat Turner, Harriet Tubman, and John Brown.
So when you are 80 years old do you want to say, I spent most of my life living with my parents before I finally realized that they were abusing me, and I spent most of my life on psychiatric medications, and then with psychotherapists and life coaches? I was trying to recover and live well.
Or would you rather say, I spent most of my adult life fighting in a war on behalf of the survivors of abuse. I vanquished foes in great numbers. And because of that I have been able to claim my rightful place in this world, rather than having to live in the very very small space which the abusers tried to leave for me, a situation which leads many to suicide.
A victim goes to the police station to report that they were raped. What the desk officer tells them is, “You sure came to the right place. We have therapists and life-coaches on duty 24 hours a day to help you recover from your condition and to get beyond all this anger.”
The bright light today is that some people are starting to sue their psychotherapists.
Now, these therapy malpractice attorneys are still saying Good Therapist – Bad Therapist. I do not agree that there ever could be a good therapist, because the entire enterprise is wrong and is based on exploiting survivors. But at least this is a start. And these attorneys mostly want to sue licensed psychotherapists, not life coaches or anyone else, because the former likely have insurance. But this is still a good start.
And these attorney’s are mostly looking at “transference”. In part his is because of what has already been established in case law. And it is rightly recognized that that is where the therapist has lots of power.
It if a Freud idea. To put it in more simple language, at some point the client will realize that they have been spilling their guts to someone who only wants to use it all against them, and usually just like their parents did. The therapist is another abuser, and the client sees this and they are pissed. Its just that Freud wants to vindicate the parents and the therapist, so he puts it back on the client.
So the client either submits, like they probably did with their parents, or in those very rare cases they tell the therapist off, and maybe now even file a lawsuit.
If anyone wants to share info about one of these lawsuits, I would love to hear about it. If anyone wants to file such a lawsuit I would love to be able to help in anyway possible. And if you are an attorney, I would love to be able to help you do what you do.
Now it is hard to outlaw talk between consenting adults. And a therapist’s license does not protect the public, it protects the license holder, and this is especially malicious when it comes to children not currently being represented by an attorney in an open court case.
But even though we cannot outlaw talk between consenting adults, if one of those parties then comes to see that they have been conned and taken advantage of, buy all means sue.
And meanwhile the survivors of abuses need to band together, reject all forms of therapy and recovery with the highest possible level of prejudice, and instead work for obtaining justice. There is no way of living well until you are able to stand up for yourself in public. Otherwise you are just helping the abusers and their therapist and life-coach accomplices.