On January 24th, 2023, after months of debilitating insomnia and polypharmacy, Lindsay Clancy strangled her three children before attempting to take her own life. She is currently on trial for their deaths, which her defense attorneys argue resulted from postpartum psychosis.
It may seem strange that I could relate to Lindsay Clancy at all. I’ve never been pregnant, and I’ve certainly never been accused of killing anyone. And yet, despite our differences, I can’t help but see a little of myself in Lindsay.
It all started three years ago during my last semester of college. I had been tossing and turning more than usual at night, and so, like Lindsay, I was prescribed a benzodiazepine to quell my anxiety—Xanax, in my case. At the time, I didn’t know much about Xanax, but my doctor assured me that it was no different than taking a shot of vodka. Reassured, I figured I’d take it for two weeks, get through my midterms, and after those two weeks, my life would go back to normal.
That was over three years ago. I’m still not quite back to normal, and I’m not sure I ever will be.
My heart pounded violently as I walked into the ER a little over two weeks later after my prescription had run out. I didn’t know what was wrong with me—sure, I had trouble falling asleep sometimes, but not like this. To stay up for one night, let alone three, was highly unusual. It was as if, without Xanax, my body had forgotten how to sleep on its own. But after conducting an EKG, the ER doctors insisted I was healthy. I was given an Ativan, a script for hydroxyzine, and sent on my merry way.
By the time I saw my psychiatrist a few days later, I had done my homework. I learned that I was likely going through rebound insomnia, a common symptom of Xanax withdrawal. I learned that Xanax is a highly addictive drug that can cause dependency within merely three to six weeks of continuous use—vital information I hadn’t been aware of before. Some sources claim dependency can occur even sooner. My doctor insisted with a chuckle that it was “impossible” that my unusual insomnia was being caused by Xanax withdrawal. Rather, it was a sign that my anxiety was getting worse, and the right course of action would be to up my dosage.
But, like Lindsay, I was terrified of getting addicted to benzos, so I insisted that I try something else to help me sleep. And similar to Lindsay, over the course of a month, I was prescribed a slew of strong medications to be taken in unison—including Seroquel, Trazadone, Librium, Lithium, Latuda, and Lunesta.
I still didn’t sleep. Instead, I’d lay wide awake until around four in the morning, at which point I was permitted to take half a Xanax. But after a while, my body adjusted to Xanax, which is a short-acting drug, peaking within one to two hours—so even though it still put me to sleep, I definitely wasn’t staying asleep.
What people don’t understand about insomnia is that it isn’t just the occasional struggle to fall asleep at night. When you’ve struggled with severe insomnia, like Lindsay and I did—I’m talking one to four hours of sleep every night for days, weeks, even months on end—the way you interpret reality shifts.
At first, I was just physically uncomfortable. My body was tense and shook at all times. I swallowed air so rapidly that I belched constantly. I took upwards of five hot showers per day to ward off the persistent stabbing sensations in my chest. I felt sharp pains in my stomach as my food refused to digest.
But the less sleep I got, the more distorted reality became. I felt so dizzy that the words I read on my computer seemed to float off the screen. The world around me felt dull and gray. I was irritable, pessimistic. I suffered from panic attacks daily. The bright lights from the TV were enough to throw me into a rage. I was angry, even violent—mostly towards myself, other times towards benign household objects.
Strangest of all, I developed what I can only describe as a sleep phobia.
On the one hand, I became terrified that I wouldn’t fall asleep. As I walked to my bed every night, my stomach shuddered with butterflies and my heart pounded rapidly with the fear that, once again, I would lay awake in agony for hours.
But even worse was that part of me actually became scared of falling asleep at all. Suddenly, this thing that I had done every night for years, this thing that I could no longer do on my own, had become mysterious and elusive, completely out of my control. And if I couldn’t control it, was it truly safe? The bridge between consciousness and unconsciousness began to feel fragile and dangerous, like a tightrope tremulously walked by a trapeze artist.
And sure enough, despite the fact that I was severely sleep-deprived, it was as if my brain began to actively resist sleep. Often, when I would fall asleep, my body would jerk itself awake, as if sleep itself were a wild animal to be avoided.
Simply put, insomnia was the worst mental and physical torture I’d ever known.
During this ordeal, my doctor didn’t seem to take me seriously, brushing off any side-effects I got from my various medications—including heart palpitations and restless legs—as “psychosomatic.” Worst of all, he seemed to find my ordeal amusing. So, when he laughed at me for the last time, I resorted to what some might call “doctor shopping.”
Much has been conjectured on social media about Lindsay’s alleged doctor shopping. Some say that she was just an addict trying to get a benzo prescription. But for me, it wasn’t about getting a fix. It was about getting answers.
Of course, in an ideal world, you stay with one doctor and give the prescribed treatment a fair shot over the course of a few months. But while I’m not condoning doctor shopping, I know what it’s like to be so sleep-deprived and desperate, so terrified of losing everything you hold dear—your family, your career, your health—that when your sleep meds don’t work immediately, or when you get strange side effects that your doctor brushes off as being “all in your head,” it’s easy to panic and seek a second opinion. I’m not sure if that’s what happened to Lindsay, but that’s what happened to me.
And while I know that great doctors do exist, the fact of the matter is, many of the doctors I saw during this time weren’t. They were terse and uncaring as they rushed me through twenty-minute appointments. The idea that benzos aren’t that addictive, and, in fact, I may want to consider taking them long-term, or the idea that it’s “impossible” for antidepressant discontinuation to cause withdrawal, are just some of the sheer absurdities I was told by my doctors. I don’t have an M.D.—but when doctors are repeatedly telling you things that brazenly contradict the latest medical literature, it can be easy to lose faith in your treatment. I have to wonder if Lindsay had the same experience.
In the end, due to persistent insomnia and anxiety, I was prescribed around fifteen medications over a three-month period by five different doctors, including Klonopin, Ambien, Remeron, Trazadone, Buspar, Prozac, Lithium, Librium, Seroquel, Propranolol, and medical marijuana—many of which Lindsay Clancy was also prescribed. And despite the stigma of doctor shopping, none of my doctors were unaware of my medical history. Each of them knew what I had been prescribed previously, and each of them had opinions that contradicted the previous doctor.
And like Lindsay, despite the medications, I didn’t get better—instead, I only got worse.
I’ve seen a lot of chatter on social media that Lindsay wasn’t truly overmedicated—that, like me, she was switching medications so frequently that there simply wasn’t enough time for them to affect her adversely. I’ve seen others say that if she had just given her meds more time to work, this tragedy never would have happened.
On face value, this seems compelling. Take Zoloft, for instance, which Lindsay took briefly before discontinuing due to worsening anxiety and insomnia. Zoloft takes around four to six weeks to reach a full therapeutic effect for depression. You might expect, then, that adverse effects of Zoloft wouldn’t fully appear until several days or weeks after starting. Or, if she did experience adverse effects initially, they would simply go away with time.
But most people who’ve ever started an antidepressant know that in the first few days of taking it, you often feel a bit strange. When I myself took Zoloft several years ago for depression, the first night I took it was marked by restless sleep, terrifying nightmares, and intrusive thoughts—symptoms that never fully went away after the four-to-six-week mark.
Likewise, after a few days of taking Latuda—described by my doctor as a “mood stabilizer” rather than the atypical antipsychotic it actually is—I developed severely restless legs, a condition often associated with akathisia, which I can only describe as the overwhelming desire to climb out of your own body. When another one of my doctors bumped me up to 20 milligrams of Prozac, within a couple of days, I experienced restless sleep and intense burning sensations down the back of my neck, which resulted in me titrating back down to 10 milligrams.
How could any of this be possible, unless the medications are, in fact, having a significant impact on your brain chemistry over a short period of time?
By the time I checked myself in the hospital, I was exhausted and seemingly out of options. I had tried everything I could think of. Every sleep medication. Every over-the-counter supplement. Every night-time tea. Every sleep podcast. I was running three miles per day and lifting heavy weights. Nothing was working. The idea of hurling myself into traffic had begun to feel reasonable.
And, like Lindsay, I don’t feel like I got the help I needed at the hospital. I always thought that if you were going through a crisis, then a psychiatric hospital was the right place to be. I was wrong. Instead, I spent most of my time watching The Hunger Games, making beaded bracelets, and avoiding the ire of overworked nurses. If I thought that the doctors and nurses were cold on the outside, they were even more so on the inside.
In the three days I was there, I only saw a doctor once for a brief appointment. From talking to my fellow inmates, many of whom had been to that hospital several times, I quickly learned that a mental hospital, or, at least, the one I was in, wasn’t really a place to “get help”. Rather, it was a place where you were allowed to take a brief pause—to get temporary respite from the rest of society.
And when I left the hospital, I felt more hopeless than ever.
But upon leaving, I came to the realization that no external medication was going to fix what was ultimately an internal problem. I had been on-and-off psychiatric medications since I was sixteen years old, but nothing had really changed. I had tried every big-name antidepressant, and yet, I was still depressed. I was still anxious. I had tried every sleep med, but I still wasn’t sleeping. What if it wasn’t psychiatric drugs that would fix me? What if I needed to try fixing myself?
When I got home, I threw out most of my meds, save for a few of the “lighter” ones, like Buspar. And without the influence of heavier medications, I nearly stopped sleeping entirely. But while before I would panic and seek a new doctor for another opinion, another prescription, this time, I just accepted my sleeplessness. I wasn’t sleeping, and that was okay. After all, now I had more time to read books, watch movies, and take walks on the beach. Somehow, despite my insomnia, I managed to graduate that semester.
And here’s when things really changed. On my twenty-seventh birthday, nearly three months after my ordeal had started, I went to a Buddhist temple to learn how to meditate. From there, I embarked on what I can only describe as a spiritual journey. I also found an excellent therapist, one who really listened to me, who recognized signs of OCD and treated me accordingly. It wasn’t easy—in the first few weeks, whenever I sat down to meditate, it was if my brain was writhing around on the floor in pain—but after a while, with a lot of hard work, I managed to reset my nervous system. Eventually, I was able to sleep again, though the imprint of that terrible summer remains.
But while I got better, Lindsay Clancy never did.
Instead, on January 24th, 2023, she did the unthinkable. And, despite our striking similarities, our stories are still very different.
On top of mistreated mental illness, debilitating insomnia, and destabilizing polypharmacy, Lindsay was also raising three young children and dealing with precarious postpartum hormones. According to her defense team, she was also dealing with postpartum psychosis. While it’s easy for me to say I wouldn’t ever do what Lindsay did, the truth is, when I was most ill, I became someone very different, someone who was capable of flying into uncontrollable rage. And while I don’t know if Lindsay’s mistreated mental illness exonerates her from her actions, at the very least, it should be taken into heavy consideration.
With all of the mental health discourse surrounding this case, it can be easy to forget that it isn’t the psychiatric system that’s currently on trial. But despite her monstrous act, and despite the fact that she should face consequences, I can’t shake the feeling that Lindsay may have also suffered at the hands of a broken psychiatric system.
If there’s any good that can possibly come of this case, it’s that we’re finally having long overdue discussions about postpartum mental health. But I think the conversation should go even further. Why does there seem to be such a disconnect between psychiatrists and patients? Why are some psychiatrists so reluctant to believe that medications can, sometimes, cause serious damage? Why is inpatient mental health treatment often so poor?
And at what point has psychiatry done all it can do? And when a patient has reached that point—what’s next?
It’s possible that as more information comes out during the trial, I’ll relate to Lindsay Clancy less and less. And yet, right now, try as I might, I just can’t help it.
I can’t help but relate to Lindsay Clancy.
Hi Tatiana,
Thank you for your story and how it relates to Lindsay Clancy. I experienced much of the same treatment at the hands of numerous doctors about 30 years ago and Mather had similar experiences 60 years ago. I do think, in a way, the profession of psychiatry is on trial in this case. The idea that a newly psychiatrist, with woefully inadequate experience and judgment, was treating Lindsay is its own crime in a way. Hope you do well on your journey.
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Hi Ann,
Thank you for the kind comment. I’m sorry to hear about your experiences with psychiatry and I hope that you have found healing. Unfortunately, I have met more people who have had negative experiences with psychiatry than positive ones. Surely that says something about the psychiatric industry.
You’re right – the efficacy of psychiatry is definitely a huge part of this trial, and maybe I didn’t emphasize that enough in my essay. Interestingly, my initial doctor that I spoke about in this essay who prescribed me many medications over a short period was also a young, relatively new doctor. I have to wonder if inexperience is leading young psychiatrists to take a ‘shotgun approach’ with medication, whereas a more seasoned doctor would take a more measured approach.
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It’s inaccurate to say that this newly psychiatrist was woefully inexperienced. A psychiatry residency is a 4 year long program (sometimes 5 years) during which the psychiatrist is already a licensed medical doctor. It’s 4 years of intensive training across the areas of psychiatry meeting with hundreds of patients, and each year they have to pass exams to move to the next year. She was also board certified which not all doctors are. The failings of psychiatry in this case don’t have to do with this one doctor’s inexperience, they are far more systemic and wide ranging. She testified to the widely held beliefs that medications (SSRIs) are very effective (which they are not) and to the idea that depression and anxiety are disease entities (they are not). Those are psychiatry’s fallacies.
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If you’re well trained and experienced doing ineffective or destructive things, you’ll still be ineffective or destructive. Maybe moreso!
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Lets dissect my old buddy Steve here. Pretend I am god. The maybe moreso thing is what rings a bit. He’s a bit angry. That’s good. The rest is just bla bla bla bla blaaaa bla. Right Steve McQueen.
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Thank you for a very thoughtful and informative article.
You write:
“Why are some psychiatrists so reluctant to believe that medications can, sometimes, cause serious damage?”
In my experience, all psychiatrists refuse to believe that psych drugs often cause serious (and irreparable) damage.
As for why – I would have thought that was obvious. If they admitted it, they would have to shut up shop. The “cures” they are selling are worse than the “diseases.”
People sometimes ask me for advice on stopping psych drugs, as they know what I’ve gone through (and continue to go through) with my husband’s withdrawal from “anti-psychotics” and “mood stabilizers.”
Unfortunately, all I can tell them is that it’s hard and continues to be hard, 16 years on. 16 years after stopping those drugs, my husband is basically still like someone who has traumatic brain injury (with the occasional psychotic episode thrown into the mix). Well, he does have traumatic brain injury.
Let’s see you find a psychiatrist who will admit that this is what their drugs do.
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Hi Judith,
Thank you for the comment. I’m so sorry to hear about you and your husband’s experiences with psychiatry. I don’t know if many people realize how hard it can be to get off medications. I remain on a low dose of antidepressants to this day, not because I think they do much for me, but because I simply haven’t been able to get through the tough withdrawal phase. Interestingly, anytime I’ve ever gone to a psychiatrist to ask for help tapering off antidepressants, they seem either very resistant to the idea, or they insist that tapering off over a couple of weeks should be sufficient (which is obviously untrue, especially if you’ve been taking meds for years).
When I asked that question you referenced in the essay, I was mostly being rhetorical, because I completely agree with you – psychiatrists are in a strange position, because they have to defend their profession, and the only way for them to do that is to invalidate the experiences of their patients. I can’t tell you the number of doctors I’ve seen who are extremely skeptical when I tell them of the various side effects I have gotten from medications, such as vivid nightmares or anhedonia.
I always wonder how many psychiatrists have ever taken medications themselves, and if they have, perhaps they’ve been lucky to only have positive experiences. Maybe some of them truly do believe in the efficacy of psychiatry, and they just chalk up any side effects patients face as a result of worsening mental illness. I’m not sure. Regardless, psychiatrists tend to be very defensive regarding the safety of medications, like you said. It’s frustrating.
Anyways, I wish you and your husband continued healing.
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“Why are some psychiatrists so reluctant to believe that medications can, sometimes, cause serious damage?”
They have student loans!
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Haha, very true!
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Tatiana, agree long term severe insomnia is “the worst mental and physical torture”. I went for over a year dealing with it. Some mild-moderate sleep issues first began in cancer treatment due to 3 chemo drugs and steroids you must take with the chemo. So I was Rx’d a “Z drug” called Imovane (aka Zopiclone) For the first 3 weeks it let me get 6 hours of sleep. But 2 months later it only allowed me to sleep 4 hours and soon I was only able to sleep 3 hours per night. After sleeping 3 hours a night for an additional 4 more months I was told I needed another surgery. I was very concerned to be going into a major surgery so sleep deprived and was sent to a psychiatrist for “help with sleep meds”. What transpired was the most sickening display of apathy and unethical, deceitful behavior by this young psychiatrist. I had told her it was the Imovane that really messed up my body’s ability to sleep as I had developed a major tolerance to it and severe withdrawal if I didn’t take it. I told her I REALLY wanted to get off of Imovane and was shocked when she mockingly stated “Oh you’ll probably never be able to get off of it, most people can’t”.
As to why most psychiatrists don’t want to believe, or acknowledge how damaging psych drugs can be, I believe it’s because that is all they have. They randomly put phony DSM labels on people and prescribe drugs, that’s it, that’s all they have in order to collect their big paycheck. Glad to hear you got yourself to a better place and back sleeping again.
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Hi Rosalee,
Thank you for your comment. I am absolutely infuriated reading about what you went through! The lack of transparency around sleep medications is abhorrent. The fact that you will eventually build up a tolerance to the point where you can only sleep a few hours per night – and the fact that getting off sleep medications is brutally difficult, if not nearly impossible for some – is information that should be divulged BEFORE you take the medication, not after, when your body is already dependent on it.
If patients knew beforehand that sleep medications can cause insomnia far worse than the initial insomnia that led them to get on the drug in the first place, there’s no doubt people wouldn’t take them as often. I wish I had done my research before taking sleep meds, but honestly, I just always trusted my doctors. Now, I am far more cautious.
I hope that you are cancer-free, and that you are sleeping well again. Severe insomnia truly is a nightmare.
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Indeed if one is to hear “i hope you are cancer-free” it could spark a sudden outburst. two additional words and two !!
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I lived in an apartment 10 years ago that had to replace a garage door which used to roll up. Some bright spark had rammed into it when it was nearly up and therefore broke it. A simple act caused me four years of misery because they replaced the garage door with a massive single rolling door that I could hear four floors up every time it opened and closed which was upwards of 60 times a day and often starting at 4 am when the first person left for work. I had sound test done by the council. I wrote letters to the body corporate. I begged for them to check the wheels, I was it seemed that they were rolling on a railing that was installed on top of hollow concrete. What you describe about going to bed with fear and terror around knowing that you will be woken was the worst torture ever. The bed became a War-zone. I tried sleeping in the living, room the spare room. I would even stay at hotel rooms just to get some relief. I didn’t want to be dependent on sleeping pills because I think long-term they aren’t great for you and I would stop everything I could get into my ears but the worst part with the vibrations but the floor. These low-grade rumblings every 10 to 15 minutes during the day as people came and went just about sent me in my nervous system into a spiral of epic proportions. And no one believed me. No one else seemed to hear or feel this door opening the way I did, That was the worst part.
Then Covid hit.
And all of a sudden, people didn’t go out. One day, I sat in my living room and something was different. I realised that my nervous system was not on high alert…that I hadn’t heard any door opening for a day. The elation was indescribable. When the second lockdown came came, the silence continued and I asked the Building manager. Why was the garage door so quiet?
He said, ‘oh that. Well, while back we got them to put nylon wheels on the garage door because they were an improvement on the old metal wheels’. Which meant that THEY knew that the wheels were the problem and I was right all along, that it should’ve been properly installed FOUR years ago. I was too happy to be angry that I had to live through all that.
If anyone is suffering with insomnia due to noise issues, I can’t recommend enough the Otiflek brand of silicone ear plugs. They are a game changer. They stay in your ears and they literally block out about 95% of any sounds.
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Thank you for sharing your story, Maria. What you went through sounds awful! I’m so happy that the issue is resolved, but it should have been resolved so much sooner. I really don’t think that people who have never struggled with insomnia understand how terrible it can be.
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Hey Tatiana, I totally hear you, and applaud the courage of you saying this… from 2024-2025 I lived through some heavy abuse at The Guidance Center in Flagstaff, AZ. I am about to write a story much like yours – but what was my ondoing was the heavy and extreme medical gaslighting I was exposed to…. Ugh!
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Thank you for the kind words, Malene. I just read your blog post, and I am appalled at what you went through. I am glad that you are doing better now, and I wish you continued success on your healing journey. I know how hard it can be.
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I found a YouTube channel called Insomnia Talks to be very helpful.
The Clancy case is utterly shocking, from the Court TV and headlines in main media with many thousands viewing and understanding the woefully inadequate care Lindsay recieved, from the words spoken to affect of the psychiatric professionals who engaged her, the truth about psychiatric mental heath care is hitting home to a much wider audience.
Can only hope people realise it could be or have been any of them and demand change.
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Hi Chris,
I agree with you. The details of this case are exposing the general public to how corrupt psychiatry as an industry can be.
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Hi chris, i agree with you. Who on this godforsaken dump of a planet would come up to a person the never met an d say i agree with you. maximum meltdown.
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This case brings up a conflict for me I hadn’t realised was so fundamental.
On the one hand I have always believed that these drugs cause the very problem they claim to ‘fix’. After being ‘spiked’ with benzos and a doctor who was not informed that I had been ‘spiked’ gave me a ‘provisional diagnosis’ of three serious mental illnesses that disappeared by the time I was examined by a psychiatrist, I have little doubt that they do. The drugs caused the symptoms he saw, he just wasn’t informed of the drugging by the Community Nurse who was conspiring to pervert the course of justice and forged the Forms to conceal it.
But then I look at what occurred and realised that the cover up was to ensure that my wife was not held accountable for her actions (or the ‘counsellor’ at the Private Clinic who explained to her how to arrange one of these ‘swattings’), and the Community Nurse fabricated evidence of domestic violence to slander my character and justify his unlawful detention.
“A wise man once said “when a man does something bad everyone becomes a prosecutor, but when a woman does something bad everyone becomes a defense attorney””
I’m guessing that a prosecutor would point to the three children, whereas a defense attorney would point to the psychiatrist.
As I’ve said, I’m torn by this one. I’ve personally witnessed what the State means by the “editing” of documented legal narratives for Courts, and believe me providing deliberately misleading legal narrative is the forte of the ‘mental health professionals’ where I live. They are literally forging documents with the post detention fraud in mind. They are working as a team on using the fraud to get around the protections afforded the community by the law.
I went from being subjected to a month of abuse, and being ‘spiked’ with date rape drugs and having a knife planted on me to ensure police used their weapons to unlawfully detain me (‘swatting’), to being a knife wielding, drug abusing, psychotic wife beater in a matter of two documents. That ‘switch’ was then concealed from my legal representatives, and I was then a long term mental patient whose complaining about being ‘spiked’ was a paranoid delusion requiring treatment. The gaslighting and organised ‘gang stalking’ (by the hospital staff and their recruits) something to behold.
Not a chance of a fair trial in my State………. given that where it comes to psychiatric abuses, the State has a blanket cover up policy and will go all the way and provide fraudulent legal narrative to the Courts in that regard.
I’m guessing the Attorney General becoming a ‘patient’ at the Private Clinic was a means of ensuring that the conversation (tip off) could be seen as confidential? Not that confidentiality meant a lot when my medical records containing extremely personal information, not requested by lawyers, was being released instead of the factual documents showing the crimes?
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Thank you for sharing your story. I’m so sorry for everything you went through, it’s absolutely appalling. I’m not sure that people who haven’t experienced the dark side of psychiatry truly understand how pervasive the dishonesty and gaslighting can be. And of course, if you talk about it, you’re just accused of being mentally ill. Truthfully, if I had never experienced the gaslighting myself, I might have never believed it. But here we are.
I hope that you are healing.
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Just a point about my ‘paranoid delusions’, the only problem with truth is that it can’t be ‘treated’, only drugged and electricitied from memory in a shithole torture centre the State calls a hospital.
The great news is that if one knows what to look for, you can spot when the State is going to use it’s powers against it’s ‘enemies’ (that is, people speaking truth they prefer not spoken).
In my instance there became an urgency in seeking to cease my heartbeat because of my approaching the police with the proof of the conspiracy to torture and kidnap. That was when the intent was ‘spotted’ by the person who interrupted matters. What wasn’t known by those plotting to end my heartbeat was that the police were not going to do anything anyway……….they had support in the plot to torture and kidnap, and thought the police would perform their duty. The police weren’t going to act over the murder of someone who documents had been forged to make into a ‘mental patient’. That ‘path’ is quite convenient to the State, and the thugs they have procured for political purposes.
And certainly once they had done the cover up via the Chief Psychiatrist they weren’t going to act against the people they had committed acts of fraud and uttering to protect (keep in place knowing they were compromised). It takes a lot to get someone in a position where they can ‘follow orders’ and unintentionally negatively outcome for the State…….. only to have the whole thing exposed because someone wanted to run one through for a ‘friend in need’ (ie his wife might be held to account for ‘assisting’ with setting someone up for torture and kidnapping).
Still, what I know is that I can be drugged without my knowledge with date rape drugs by a bus driver, have a weapon planted on me and then police can shoot me in my bed and no one would ask a single question……. the Chief Psychiatrist says he has no problem with such outcomes, and he doesn’t refer such matters on for investigation. Zero accountability as far as he is concerned. The documents can be forged and “edited” for ‘human rights lawyers’ (waaahahahahahaha who the Hell are they kidding?), and the corpse can be added to the list from the “Targeted Review” the State needed to conduct to ensure their little ‘units’ work was well and truly covered up.
I’m guessing at this point in time that the State wants me to speak about these matters as it is a warning to anyone considering speaking a truth they do not want spoken. Because they certainly weren’t in a hurry to dismantle the whole chain of people who were ‘following orders’. Sure those using the ‘mechanism’ for their own benefit seem to have had some consequences (heart attack and died, fled the State) but Dr ‘Cocaine psychosis harvest the morphine from another patient, and cocktail with midazolam for a code black’ is still holding Court in the E.D. like Cesare Borgia.
Oh to be allowed a lawyer to retrieve my property and leave this vile shithole. Though I guess keeping me pinned down here (because my Consulate turned their back on my request for assistance when I approached them) allows me to be murdered at the States leisure. And it’s not like I don’t have the proof…… the problem is that people are afraid to look, and prefer to live with the delusion that they are safe in their consumption of food and in their beds……. when the State is enabling ‘chemically enhanced coercive interrogation techniques’ with a finger point from a Community Nurse no less. Terrorist? Criminal? Nope, I upset a woman by telling her I was leaving………… and the wheels went into motion with a conspiracy at a Private Clinic, and a public officer who likes to exercise his powers where he has none (just like a rapist really).
And the Community Nurse gets the benefit of people who will “edit” documented legal narratives for lawyers and the Courts……. I wonder if our footballers (Sydney Swans) who seem to have been up to a bit of ‘mischief’ will receive the same sort of ‘support’ from the State. Or will they too be ‘spiked’ and jumped in their beds and have a weapon put to their heads and a ‘confession’ forged for convenience? It’ll be interesting to see what it means when their ‘rights’ are on display.
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Hi Tatiana, After reading your harrowing story, I am so glad to read that you are doing so much better now. Psych meds are clearly dangerous. I want to use this moment to announce the end of a program that I have sponsored for 12 years. But the good news is that for the next 2 months it will be FREE. Announcement:
Thanks to madinamerica, Robert Whittaker gave me a platform to announce a project that was groundbreaking and potentially transformative to the whole field of mental health therapy. The article was titled, “A Self Help Version of EMDR Could Make Healing From Trauma Easier”. It was in the July 2, 2021 edition. This was EMDR therapy, combined with elements of 5 other therapies that people could do at home. It succeeded in many ways, spreading to 36 countries and selling thousands of programs. It is in use by therapists in many countries. But, no institution was ever far sighted enough to experiment in adopting it. There is so much wasted time in group treatment hospitals, or in prisons, so much potential for use for veterans returning to civilian life. It is the most anti-suicidal program that has even been created. Many people have written to me to say it has helped them when traditional therapy has not and helped them even more than in-office EMDR sessions.
The web-site is heavy with information, and apparently not very persuasive. Chat GPT assesses it as “this is a classic case of great product, weak packaging. The product is probably 10x better than the website suggests.”
We live in a dark time when there is a tendency to distrust everything. There is so much disinformation, and worldwide scam artists that even something for free ignites suspicion. I have doubts about how many people will overcome their suspicion and take my offer of a free download of the Se-REM program. For the next 2 months, for Sept. and Oct. the cost of the download will be zero. In November the website will be closed and sales will end.
I started the program with the hope of changing mental health delivery. Obviously, an outlandish goal. But mental health treatment could be shortened and improved if Se-REM was used as a template and re-designed to fit a variety of traumatic circumstances. I still believe this is true. The power is in harnessing and directing REM brain activity. Maybe this will still happen, but years from now.
For those that doubt my sincerity, I can only ask you to see that I am an open book. I became a therapist because I am fascinated by any individual’s life history, personal story, values and thoughts. Being a therapist was a privilege. I once thought to be successful I would need to manage people. As a therapist I realized I did not ever want to tell people what to do, to manage or control them. I valued connecting. My wife and I agreed we would never charge more than most people could afford, (then around $50.), because we did not ever want a client to have to stop therapy due to not being able to afford it. We valued the long-term relationships more than we valued income. We valued one parent always being home with our two kids, so we job shared, and had equal roles at home and at work.
Recently, a purchaser complained about the $19. cost of the download. I did not bother to explain that the cost of producing the program, lawyer’s fee, music rights, website development, advertising all told was more than 10 thousand dollars, Se-REM has manage to break even, but this year expenses are greater than revenue. My commitment was to provide the program up until the point that it impacts my own retirement finances. That point has been reached. If there was a donor, or an institution that was interested, I would happily donate Se-REM so that it would continue to be available.
Even if you have doubts about needing a program like Se-REM, I encourage you to download the free program and keep it for future use. Human experience always involves loss of loved ones, among other potential tragedies and traumas. Se-REM can help you through any trauma once it is over and in the past. The free download can be found on the buy page of the website: Se-REM.com
It has been a thrill to me to know that my voice, and my program has been in use in widespread parts of the world. That is my motivation. I will continue to give free consultations to anyone who uses the program, for as long as I am alive. I am 77 and who knows how much time we each have. And I will end with the same words as I used in the program,
“I wish you well”.
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Hi David,
Thanks for the kind comment. I am doing much better, but admittedly, it is still a process.
I’m sure that for some people, psych meds can be beneficial. Unfortunately, I know of more people who have been harmed rather than helped by meds, and I put myself in that category as well.
Thank you for sharing your program. Congratulations on your great success, and I hope that your program continues to positively impact people around the world!
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hi Tatiana
You are correct so easy for the psychiatrist to dismiss the patient by applying a label. And carers if they dare to suggest their precious drugs are causing any side effects, let alone extremely serious ones, are neurotic or antipsychiatry. Adverse drug reactions,poly pharmacy,over medication all a delusion. I’m glad you are healing take care much love from Australia -it is equally bad here… K
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Thank you for the kind words, k.
Yes, it is extremely frustrating and disappointing. In my experience, psychiatrists tend to become very defensive if you bring up even very common side effects of medications.
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https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/alex-beam/gracefully-insane/9781586481612/?lens=publicaffairs
Gracefully Insane The Rise and Fall of America’s Premier Mental Hospital
By Alex Beam
Boston Globe reporter Alex Beam (Robert Whitaker knows?) wrote about psychiatrist suicides at McLeans.
Did Lindsay Clancy’s defense bring up the psychiatrist suicides at McLeans? The ones they don’t talk about? Psychiatry can’t recognize impending suicide among psychiatrists, therefore can’t detect or help others.
Mad has reprinted studies saying same.
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