Most thankfully, I found it. Or better said, it found me, once I got not only psychiatry but all things “mental health” industry out of my way, including myself. I left psychiatry behind over 15 years ago after a 20-year relationship with it, got very dysfunctional toward the end there, and it almost killed me. But layer by layer, over a period of years, I got out of that weird web and put myself back together again with new life tools and perspectives, and found what I wanted in life and from life. That was quite a trek, and not without battle scars, as you are knowing now; definitely not for the faint of heart and spirit. What I learned in my journey was that when we heal to the point of feeling predominantly our own light channeling through us, and appreciating that to the nth degree, then we automatically have an abundance of it to share with others. It’s pretty cool! Win/win :).